What was once a powerful division has crumbled as only one team sits with a winning record and the worst team in the league resides in Thundercats. Ouch. [
2015 Pre-Season |
2014 Early Season]
Team Spade (9-6)
After assembling a juggernaut in
the dispersal draft, Randall saw his powerful team fall to Earth due to numerous injuries. Still, Spade’s first year in SlamNation was an unqualified success as they got a playoff appearance, and
a semi-upset win, under their belts. This year, Spade started off 5-1 before going 4-5 in recent weeks, but they'll likely still win the division and face off against one of the strong Voltron teams. A 2015 draft heavy on veterans reflected Randall’s championship aspirations. The return on that draft, fifteen weeks in, is David West and Paul Pierce, as guys like Ersan Ilyasova, J.R. Smith, Anderson Varejao, and Nene Hilario are all gone, after logging about 25+ combined games for Spade.
Injuries have again been an issue this season as Kawhi Leonard has only recently returned, Kobe Bryant is gone for months again, and Al Horford was slow the start the season. Also, franchise cornerstone Kevin Love has been good, but his 42.7 FG% and non-All Star status must hurt. But let’s not weep for Spade as they still have one of the best and most balanced rosters. Horford and Millsap are a wonderful tandem, Eric Bledsoe has adjusted to life with Isaiah Thomas, and Pierce plus Wilson Chandler is just right on the wing. There’s still enough here to contend, as this team has no true weaknesses and is also ranked tops in REB, third in PTS, and fourth in STL. Let’s see what Spade can do in the playoffs for their sophomore season!
Chunky Monkeys (6-8-1)
This is kind of a weird team. Despite a team of mostly gunners, Monkeys rank first in FG% (not to mention third in FT%). Much of that can be attributed to Marc Gasol and Goran Dragic’s high volume shooting combined with ultra-high efficiency. Plus, MVP candidate James Harden is throwing up 27.5 PTS on 18.3 shots and 45.5 FG%. This team is also pretty good at AST/STL, which is expected for a guard heavy team. But then they are near the bottom of the league in 3PT, and near the top in BLK. Very strange!
We can’t continue without shining the light on the #1 and #2 overall picks, Andrew Wiggins and Jabari Parker. Wiggins is already on the cusp of stardom and while Parker is out for the year, he showed enough in his twenty five appearances. The two of them will team up with Harden, Gasol, the wonderful Jeff Teague, and either Dragic or Jrue Holiday to form a core that could soon bring Monkeys back to their winning days. In fact, maybe they’re already on their way now. After coming out of the gates with three losses, Evan’s team has managed three straight wins. They are also in the playoff race, as a non-winning record could still get them into the post-season. They have huge weaknesses in 3PT and REB, but after the
greatest draft positions ever, we don’t expect Chunky Monkeys to be down for long.
NJ All-Stars (5-10)
Our division winners the past two seasons has seen their season collapse into a disorientating mess. Eddie has never faced this sort of adversity before. Can he stay mentally strong? The thing is, NJ All-Stars is still sort of the in the playoff picture. Sure, they’re on a six game losing streak, but LeBron James is back! And if All-Stars can hit the playoffs, could Paul George return also?... This team is last in FG%, turns the ball over a lot, and can’t really rebound. The good news is their motion offense generates a lot of assists and open looks, but you know, that bad shooting isn’t translating to lots of points.
Kyle Lowry has been a stud this year, but Reggie Jackson and Lance Stephenson have lost some of their shine. Both are still doing some versatile things, but their FG% is awful. And Joakim Noah — the answer that wasn’t the answer last post-season — has had trouble with his health and staying in the lineup. The good news is that GM Eddie 2015 RD1 pick, Tobias Harris, has been awesome, with 17.4 PTS, 6.6 REB, 1.1 3PT, 1.0 STL, and 46.5 FG%. He has really helped fill the void left behind by George. However, this season seems like a lost one All-Stars, and they might be better off rallying for the Toilet Bowl and securing a top pick.
Funk Coalition (2-13)
Well, here we go, officially the worst team in the league. Funk started off with six losses, notched two wins, and then slumped to a still ongoing seven game losing streak. They’ve won one category on three separate occasions, likely turnovers. Overall, Funk are pretty terrible at FG%, league worst in PTS, FT% and 3PT, and about league average in AST and STL. They are great at REB and BLK but that just leads to lots of blowout losses and moral victories. The big
mid-season trade away of Al Jefferson and Derrick Rose have been a wash so far, as Funk awaits Ricky Rubio’s return to full form. What is owner Jon doing?! Answer: Nobody knows.
On paper, the trio of Rubio, Rondo, and Michael Carter-Williams should throw up an array of counting stats while nuking the percentages and TOs. And the Andre Drummond plus DeAndre Jordan frontline should be enough to provide plenty of everything while also nuking percentages and TOs. However, real life NBA trades have sapped Rondo’s AST numbers and then there’s Josh Smith, who has only found his footing post-Dwight’s injury. Adding insult to injury, sixth keeper Eric Gordon, who was cut earlier this season, is now fantasy relevant again. The most consistent, and only bright spot on this team has been DeMarre Carroll... And let’s not even talk about the 2015 rookies, Dante Exum and Marcus Smart, who have both been erratic to say the least. What’s next for Funk? Another rebuild?!
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