Mid-Season Report: Voltron
For our second divisional look, it's Voltron up to the deck. The division is pretty much sealed up and it's a surprisingly team up at the top. Let's take a look!
So Buckets (7-5)
A stunning turnaround for Josh's sophomore year in Slam Nation. After going 3-9 last season, the So Buckets are now almost assured of a spot in the playoffs -- they have won five of their last six games. They're doing it with the combination of good shooting from the field, strong rebounding, excellent ball distribution, and fantastic steals. All of this and they aren't bad in any category. This is a solid team.
The turnaround is fueled by Kyrie Irving, who is averaging 23.7 PTS, 5.7 AST, 2.0 3PT, and 1.8 STL. Paired with Sixth Man of the Year candidate Jarrett Jack and the serviceable Darren Collison, the three combine to give this backcourt plenty of underrated oomph. While the other four keepers have been pretty disappointing -- Pau Gasol, Andre Iguodala, Gerald Wallace, even Evan Turner a bit -- GM Josh has done a great job using the waiver wire. Case in point, Larry Sanders and his team leading 8.4 REB and 3.2 BLK. With a three game lead on the next closest competitor, this division is just about locked up. We're a bit early but let's just go ahead and give Josh a big hand for a great turnaround!
MoRRie's Pogiboys (4-8)
Coming off the heels of a 5-14 season in 2011, Alvin's team was trending up with a fantastic 8-4 record last season. After winning the Toilet Bowl and the right to draft Anthony Davis, we figured the Pogiboys were going to be the Voltron champs. Well, things aren't as they should be. While Davis has been good -- 13.0 PTS, 7.9 REB, 1.9 BLK, 1.1 STL -- and fellow rookie Michael Kidd-Gilchrist has contributed nicely all around, this team is lacking something. A backcourt featuring Brandon Jennings and Mike Conley Jr. should be able to do it all (except for shooting efficiently), and they do boast a combined 11.7 AST, 4.4 STL, and 3.3 3PT per game. But somehow this team is only above average in two categories: third in BLK and fourth in STL.
Everywhere else this team seems to be lacking. Roy Hibbert and Marcus Thornton have both regressed badly, Brandon Knight hasn't improved, and the disappointing draft only unearthed the new and improved J.R. Smith. There is some room for improvement here, as Tristan Thompson will now get all the minutes he can handle on the heels of the Anderson Varejao injury -- and it looks like he'll be a nightly double double threat. While the post-season is not mathematically out of the question, it's more likely Alvin will find themselves back in the Toiet Bowl as they've lost six of their last seven.
Super Ninja (3-8-1)
Thien's team has won this division two years running and boast a roster of versatile talents capable of beating anyone. They have been contenders year in and year out. Until now. Most of it is injury related, as Andrew Bynum has yet to make an appearance and John Wall has only played seven games. But this team is sliding backwards across the board. Dwayne Wade is still a fantasy stud, but not a top ten player by any measure. Paul Pierce and Rudy Gay are both losing their passing touch, while shooting horrifically from the field. Tyson Chandler is the lone man in the middle, swatting about a shot a game and producing a nice 12.1 PTS and 10.9 REB. He needs help though, and while Nikola Pekovic is in the midst of a semi-breakout season, he's currently injured.
Looking over this roster, there's still plenty of talent on board but Super Ninja has slipped dramatically. They aren't top three in any categories, and are only above average in FG%, PTS, and TO. It's hard to tell if a healthy slate will make this team a contender again, but this season is basically a lost one for Thien. Seeing as they've won the Toilet Bowl before -- for the rights to John Wall -- they are probably aiming to do the same so they can reverse this year's slide.
Human Amoebas (0-12)
We've never had a winless team in SlamNation but former champion Human Amoebas is going to threaten that mark this season. Management has realized that this season is a complete bust, and moved accordingly, initiating a mega-trade that netted Kevin Love at the cost of short term competitiveness. Then again, calling the 2013 version of this team "competitive" would have been a stretch. When underwhelming rookies Austin Rivers and Harrison Barnes are logging the second and third most games played for your team, you know there's a problem. Losing the talented trio of DeMarcus Cousins, Monta Ellis, and Andre Drummond will certainly hurt, but Kevin Love is a fantasy monster when healthy.
With Love, Derrick Rose, Dirk Nowitzki, and Eric Gordon back to full strength, this team would be a strong contender. The question is if all four will ever get on the floor at the same time. Rose and Gordon will have half a NBA season to regain their form, but it's an open question how much Dirk has left. Who would have thought that the Andray Blatche for Nowitzki trade would mostly be a wash so far? If the big guns can get healthy, Eric-A has the makings of an outstanding team -- perhaps even a very interesting small ball one, especially with a Paul Millsap, Love, and Nowitzki front line. But right now they are last in FG%, STL, BLK, and pretty much useless everywhere else. It's okay though, this team is being built for 2014, we just have to hope they have a win in them this season!
So Buckets (7-5)A stunning turnaround for Josh's sophomore year in Slam Nation. After going 3-9 last season, the So Buckets are now almost assured of a spot in the playoffs -- they have won five of their last six games. They're doing it with the combination of good shooting from the field, strong rebounding, excellent ball distribution, and fantastic steals. All of this and they aren't bad in any category. This is a solid team.
The turnaround is fueled by Kyrie Irving, who is averaging 23.7 PTS, 5.7 AST, 2.0 3PT, and 1.8 STL. Paired with Sixth Man of the Year candidate Jarrett Jack and the serviceable Darren Collison, the three combine to give this backcourt plenty of underrated oomph. While the other four keepers have been pretty disappointing -- Pau Gasol, Andre Iguodala, Gerald Wallace, even Evan Turner a bit -- GM Josh has done a great job using the waiver wire. Case in point, Larry Sanders and his team leading 8.4 REB and 3.2 BLK. With a three game lead on the next closest competitor, this division is just about locked up. We're a bit early but let's just go ahead and give Josh a big hand for a great turnaround!
MoRRie's Pogiboys (4-8)
Coming off the heels of a 5-14 season in 2011, Alvin's team was trending up with a fantastic 8-4 record last season. After winning the Toilet Bowl and the right to draft Anthony Davis, we figured the Pogiboys were going to be the Voltron champs. Well, things aren't as they should be. While Davis has been good -- 13.0 PTS, 7.9 REB, 1.9 BLK, 1.1 STL -- and fellow rookie Michael Kidd-Gilchrist has contributed nicely all around, this team is lacking something. A backcourt featuring Brandon Jennings and Mike Conley Jr. should be able to do it all (except for shooting efficiently), and they do boast a combined 11.7 AST, 4.4 STL, and 3.3 3PT per game. But somehow this team is only above average in two categories: third in BLK and fourth in STL.
Everywhere else this team seems to be lacking. Roy Hibbert and Marcus Thornton have both regressed badly, Brandon Knight hasn't improved, and the disappointing draft only unearthed the new and improved J.R. Smith. There is some room for improvement here, as Tristan Thompson will now get all the minutes he can handle on the heels of the Anderson Varejao injury -- and it looks like he'll be a nightly double double threat. While the post-season is not mathematically out of the question, it's more likely Alvin will find themselves back in the Toiet Bowl as they've lost six of their last seven.
Thien's team has won this division two years running and boast a roster of versatile talents capable of beating anyone. They have been contenders year in and year out. Until now. Most of it is injury related, as Andrew Bynum has yet to make an appearance and John Wall has only played seven games. But this team is sliding backwards across the board. Dwayne Wade is still a fantasy stud, but not a top ten player by any measure. Paul Pierce and Rudy Gay are both losing their passing touch, while shooting horrifically from the field. Tyson Chandler is the lone man in the middle, swatting about a shot a game and producing a nice 12.1 PTS and 10.9 REB. He needs help though, and while Nikola Pekovic is in the midst of a semi-breakout season, he's currently injured.
Looking over this roster, there's still plenty of talent on board but Super Ninja has slipped dramatically. They aren't top three in any categories, and are only above average in FG%, PTS, and TO. It's hard to tell if a healthy slate will make this team a contender again, but this season is basically a lost one for Thien. Seeing as they've won the Toilet Bowl before -- for the rights to John Wall -- they are probably aiming to do the same so they can reverse this year's slide.
Human Amoebas (0-12)
We've never had a winless team in SlamNation but former champion Human Amoebas is going to threaten that mark this season. Management has realized that this season is a complete bust, and moved accordingly, initiating a mega-trade that netted Kevin Love at the cost of short term competitiveness. Then again, calling the 2013 version of this team "competitive" would have been a stretch. When underwhelming rookies Austin Rivers and Harrison Barnes are logging the second and third most games played for your team, you know there's a problem. Losing the talented trio of DeMarcus Cousins, Monta Ellis, and Andre Drummond will certainly hurt, but Kevin Love is a fantasy monster when healthy.
With Love, Derrick Rose, Dirk Nowitzki, and Eric Gordon back to full strength, this team would be a strong contender. The question is if all four will ever get on the floor at the same time. Rose and Gordon will have half a NBA season to regain their form, but it's an open question how much Dirk has left. Who would have thought that the Andray Blatche for Nowitzki trade would mostly be a wash so far? If the big guns can get healthy, Eric-A has the makings of an outstanding team -- perhaps even a very interesting small ball one, especially with a Paul Millsap, Love, and Nowitzki front line. But right now they are last in FG%, STL, BLK, and pretty much useless everywhere else. It's okay though, this team is being built for 2014, we just have to hope they have a win in them this season!
Mid-Season Report: Silverhawks
Let's start our look at each division as the playoffs start creeping towards us -- only seven weeks away. The first division up is the Silverhawks, which features a few flip flops, especially at the top! Here was their pre-season preview.
Fob Stars (7-4-1)
After going 1-11 last season, Jimmy's team is leading the division, a shift that came without any warning. The Fob Stars started off the year in familiar fashion, limping out of the gates with two losses in three tries, but then they ripped off six straight wins -- including taking down the mighty NJ All Stars in WK5. They've recently stumbled a bit, with two losses and a tie, but already they've impressed with their turnaround this year. The big mystery is how they're winning. They're not top ranked in any category, and their strongest stat is TOs, where they rank fifth.
The strength of this team is in the frontcourt, where Zach Randolph and Joakim Noah are both averaging strong double doubles. Noah has 2.0 BLKs and 1.3 STL each game too. Perhaps the real reason for the turnaround is the shocking emergence of Kemba Walker, who is averaging 17.4 PTS, 5.8 AST, 1.9 STL, 1.2 3PT a game during his sophomore campaign. And with young guys like Dion Waiters and Tyler Zeller starting to step up, the Fob Stars could be getting stronger, even though they just lost Louis Williams for the season. Can the Fob Stars finish off a strong 2013 and win the division?
Sour Snails (7-5)
Understanding that the division was wide open, Trieu swung for the fences and made a splashy trade last week. Of course, that resulted in a disjointed WK12, as they got manhandled by Eddie's team, 0-6-3. The Sour Snails had control of the division early, vaulting out to a 6-2 start, before falling back to the pack recently. We could talk about their rankings in the various categories -- dominant in 3PT, second in PTS, third in AST, dead last in FG% and TO -- but none of that really matters as the team is clearly totally revamped.
Steph Curry is the cornerstone here, with 20.5 PTS, 6.6 AST, 3.1 3PT, 1.7 STL, and even 4.1 REB. With Damian Lillard and Monta Ellis flanking him, Curry just might lead the best backcourt in the league. The Snails are a high powered run and gun team, with everyone averaging in the mid-teens. Now to see what low post presence DeMarcus Cousins can add to the mix. A year after finishing out of the playoffs, Trieu has rebuilt and is ready to challenge once again.
Fat Jubas (6-6)
It's not looking good for the defending champs. They're only one game out of the division lead but management has not been happy with the effort they've seen. Sure they started strong and they've won three out of their past four games, but that was against opponetns who had a combined seven wins. Eric-L's team hasn't been able to handle the contenders this season and that doesn't bode well for their championship defense. Are they the 2011 Mavericks? The GM has been working the waiver wire, and made a big trade already this season, but that has all amounted to a roster that is suddenly quite unbalanced. The Jubas are good at protecting the rim, excellent putting down their free throws, but can't rebound or steal the ball. Everywhere else they are mediocre.
Swingman Nicolas Batum fills up the stat sheet, with 16.8 PTS, 5.9 REB, 4.4 AST, 2.5 3PT, 1.5 STL, and 1.1 BLK per game, but he's not going to carry a team. Kevin Garnett has been slow to start, Steve Nash has only played sixteen games so far, and Gordon Hayward has regressed badly. The jury is still out on the Marc Gasol and Tyreke Evans acquisitions, as neither has wowed their new owners with their play. The bench is a deep pit of lost souls. Is it time for the Jubas to rebuild? Or is there one final gasp left in them?
Jedi Knights (3-8-1)
Before the season, Superlum made a number of big moves. They had their sights on playoff contention and weren't afraid to shake things up to get out of their doldrums. The good news is that after back to back four win seasons, the Jedi are on pace to eclipse that figure. The bad news is, they are probably not heading to the postseason. After starting off 0-4-1, the team is trending up, but very slowly. Mostly, there isn't a solid identity here. These Knights have great FG% and terrible FT%, but nothing of note anywhere else.
We'd say that trades for Luis Scola, DeAndre Jordan, Amare Stoudemire, Greivis Vasquez, and Danilo Gallinari are all positive, but the real growth this season has been from an impressive draft. O.J. Mayo is averaging 18.2 PTS, 4.1 AST, 2.1 3PT, and 1.3 STL this season. Thaddeus Young has emerged as a very useful forward behind 15.0 PTS, 7.3 REB, 1.7 STL, 0.9 BLK. And then there's David Lee, who is the only player averaging a 20-10. Heck, we even love Chandler Parsons and his very even all around game. On top of that, Mo Williams was very good before he got injured. Looking over this roster, we see a lot of interesting pieces, and the potential is there for maybe a very competitive small ball team. Right now though, the Jedi seem to be content emerging from the shadows, and just picking up side pieces, before shaping what they have into a post-season run.
Fob Stars (7-4-1)After going 1-11 last season, Jimmy's team is leading the division, a shift that came without any warning. The Fob Stars started off the year in familiar fashion, limping out of the gates with two losses in three tries, but then they ripped off six straight wins -- including taking down the mighty NJ All Stars in WK5. They've recently stumbled a bit, with two losses and a tie, but already they've impressed with their turnaround this year. The big mystery is how they're winning. They're not top ranked in any category, and their strongest stat is TOs, where they rank fifth.
The strength of this team is in the frontcourt, where Zach Randolph and Joakim Noah are both averaging strong double doubles. Noah has 2.0 BLKs and 1.3 STL each game too. Perhaps the real reason for the turnaround is the shocking emergence of Kemba Walker, who is averaging 17.4 PTS, 5.8 AST, 1.9 STL, 1.2 3PT a game during his sophomore campaign. And with young guys like Dion Waiters and Tyler Zeller starting to step up, the Fob Stars could be getting stronger, even though they just lost Louis Williams for the season. Can the Fob Stars finish off a strong 2013 and win the division?
Sour Snails (7-5)
Understanding that the division was wide open, Trieu swung for the fences and made a splashy trade last week. Of course, that resulted in a disjointed WK12, as they got manhandled by Eddie's team, 0-6-3. The Sour Snails had control of the division early, vaulting out to a 6-2 start, before falling back to the pack recently. We could talk about their rankings in the various categories -- dominant in 3PT, second in PTS, third in AST, dead last in FG% and TO -- but none of that really matters as the team is clearly totally revamped.
Steph Curry is the cornerstone here, with 20.5 PTS, 6.6 AST, 3.1 3PT, 1.7 STL, and even 4.1 REB. With Damian Lillard and Monta Ellis flanking him, Curry just might lead the best backcourt in the league. The Snails are a high powered run and gun team, with everyone averaging in the mid-teens. Now to see what low post presence DeMarcus Cousins can add to the mix. A year after finishing out of the playoffs, Trieu has rebuilt and is ready to challenge once again.
Fat Jubas (6-6)It's not looking good for the defending champs. They're only one game out of the division lead but management has not been happy with the effort they've seen. Sure they started strong and they've won three out of their past four games, but that was against opponetns who had a combined seven wins. Eric-L's team hasn't been able to handle the contenders this season and that doesn't bode well for their championship defense. Are they the 2011 Mavericks? The GM has been working the waiver wire, and made a big trade already this season, but that has all amounted to a roster that is suddenly quite unbalanced. The Jubas are good at protecting the rim, excellent putting down their free throws, but can't rebound or steal the ball. Everywhere else they are mediocre.
Swingman Nicolas Batum fills up the stat sheet, with 16.8 PTS, 5.9 REB, 4.4 AST, 2.5 3PT, 1.5 STL, and 1.1 BLK per game, but he's not going to carry a team. Kevin Garnett has been slow to start, Steve Nash has only played sixteen games so far, and Gordon Hayward has regressed badly. The jury is still out on the Marc Gasol and Tyreke Evans acquisitions, as neither has wowed their new owners with their play. The bench is a deep pit of lost souls. Is it time for the Jubas to rebuild? Or is there one final gasp left in them?
Jedi Knights (3-8-1)
Before the season, Superlum made a number of big moves. They had their sights on playoff contention and weren't afraid to shake things up to get out of their doldrums. The good news is that after back to back four win seasons, the Jedi are on pace to eclipse that figure. The bad news is, they are probably not heading to the postseason. After starting off 0-4-1, the team is trending up, but very slowly. Mostly, there isn't a solid identity here. These Knights have great FG% and terrible FT%, but nothing of note anywhere else.
We'd say that trades for Luis Scola, DeAndre Jordan, Amare Stoudemire, Greivis Vasquez, and Danilo Gallinari are all positive, but the real growth this season has been from an impressive draft. O.J. Mayo is averaging 18.2 PTS, 4.1 AST, 2.1 3PT, and 1.3 STL this season. Thaddeus Young has emerged as a very useful forward behind 15.0 PTS, 7.3 REB, 1.7 STL, 0.9 BLK. And then there's David Lee, who is the only player averaging a 20-10. Heck, we even love Chandler Parsons and his very even all around game. On top of that, Mo Williams was very good before he got injured. Looking over this roster, we see a lot of interesting pieces, and the potential is there for maybe a very competitive small ball team. Right now though, the Jedi seem to be content emerging from the shadows, and just picking up side pieces, before shaping what they have into a post-season run.
Love Hurts
It's been a quiet season, too quiet. Until now! In one day, Trieu has reshaped the entire direction of his team. His first move was an ultra doozy that shipped out Kevin Love and a 2014 RD1 (first pick protected) to Human Ameobas for DeMarcus Cousins, Monta Ellis, Andre Drummond, and a 2014 RD3 pick. The two former SlamNation champions faced off last during the 2011 Finals and now they find themselves partners in crime.Since then, both teams have fallen on some hard times. The Sour Snails went 4-8 last season and hit rock bottom. This year they are 7-4 and leading the Silverhawks division, so they seem to have recovered well, especially after this fortifying trade. As for the Amoebas, they had a 9-10 record last season -- missing the playoffs during their championship defense -- but are winless so far this year and headed nowhere.
Wisely deciding to scrap the 2013 season, Eric-A moved for a top five fantasy stud. Let's look at if Kevin Love was worth the huge haul. Remember, Love was essentially traded for Lebron James back in 2010, so there was a lot at stake here for the Sour Snails, who patiently waited out the deluge of low ball offers. So far this season, there's no denying that Love has been a gigantic (injury) disappointment. However, in eighteen games he was still putting up 18.3 PTS, 14.0 REB, and 1.1 3PT. His FG% was atrocious, but that will recover when he's healthy. Love is the kind of foundational player that you can build a team around. You overpay for a guy like him.
Having said that, the Amoebas definitely overpaid by giving up a trio of very useful fantasy pieces. DeMarcus Cousins is already a fantasy beast, with 17.6 PTS, 10.2 REB, 1.4 STL and more upside. To celebrate his trade, Cousins put up the best game of his career last night -- 26 points, 14 rebounds, 6 assists, 2 steals, 3 blocks. Even though he has the field goal percentage of a streaky guard (43.4 FG%), that's a small price to pay for potential domination.
And we're all familiar with Monta Ellis' work. The guy scores at a good clip, swipes the ball, and provides more assists than you'd think. His FG% is horrific but that comes with the territory. And then there's Andre Drummond, whom we love. While the rook is only averaging 7.1 PTS and 7.3 REB a game this season, he's already fantasy relevant with 2.2 BLK over the past month. With only twenty plus minutes to do his work, we're already scared of the type of lines that Drummond is capable of in the future.
Losing these three players will definitely hurt the Amoebas but Eric-A is setting the table for a (hopefully) full season of Derrick Rose, Eric Gordon, Dirk Nowitzki, and Kevin Love next year. We love the Love trade, because you either go big or you go home, and Eric-A is all about championships. Fantasy wise, Love will now be the lone plus rebounder on the Amoebas, as there's nobody else on this squad capable of averaging double digit rebounds -- Paul Millsap is next best at about eight per game. Everyone else is at five or below. We'll be interested to see how Eric-A builds around Love's unique capabilities. Or if maybe he'll go with some sort of small ball.Trieu's team started off as dominating semi-small ball squad -- outfitted with LBJ, Josh Smith, and Gerald Wallace to win tons of REB/BLK matchups -- and then transitioned into more of a normal small ball team over the years. The past few drafts have brought on Klay Thompson and Damian Lillard so we thought they'd tilt even more in that direction. However, the addition of Cousins and Drummond signals a shift to a more balanced approach. Clearly they'll have more BLK from Drummond -- Josh Smith will finally have a buddy to help protect the rim -- and together they could almost replace Love's rebounding. The Snails roster could see a few more tweaks, with the only thing we know for certain being that they will be punting FG%, as they are already dead last in that category.
Trieu's second move wasn't a blockbuster, but it was still interesting as the younger Danilo Gallinari was swapped for Jedi Knight's Metta World Peace. Part of us suspects this was purely to get a Laker on the Sour Snails but Metta has also been outright amazing the past month with 14.6 PTS, 6.4 REB, 2.0 3PT, 2.2 STL, and almost a block a game. World Peace has been unleashed by D'Antoni! Gallinari can match the PTS, REB, and 3PT numbers, but has no auxiliary stats to talk about. Still, he'll be a nice piece for Superlum's team as Metta's days are numbered -- Reached for commentary during a break from sweating it out in the war room to plot his next move, Trieu said that he was basically looking to rid his team of the lighter skinned players. "White men can't jump, we all know that. Love and Gallo were good but they were holding our team back during the dunking warm ups, and making us look soft too. By taking on Cousins and Drummond, we just upped our crazy by 2000% and we'll also have World Peace on hand to mentor them. The Snails will either beat you on the court, or come at you somewhere else. You better watch out!"
One Month: Losers
Last week we looked at the four best teams so far. Now we'll look at the four worst.
Human Amoebas (0-5)
Eric-A's team can't shoot; not from the field, the charity stripe, or the three point line. They have trouble rebounding, they don't pass the ball, and they are dead last in points scored. Hey at least they're leading the league in the TO category! Facing oppponents who were a combined 17-8 has not helped one bit. With Derrick Rose, Eric Gordon, and Dirk Nowitzki with big fat "O's" next to their name, there isn't much light at the end of the tunnel here. Or wait, is there? I mean, We are high on rookies Harrison Barnes and Andre Drummond, but both are at least one year away. Austin Rivers has been disappointing, but he's getting the reps to find out if he has any NBA career ahead of him. Coach Eric-A is living and dying -- mostly the latter -- with Monta Ellis, DeMarcus Cousins, and Paul Milllsap as their replacment stars. Until the Amoebas can get some their actual superstars healthy, they could be in contention for a winless season.
Jedi Knights (0-4-1)
GM Chris hasn't dipped into the free agent pool yet this season, but a lot of pre-season trades, as well as a recent exchange of Wes Matthews for Greivis Vasquez means this team needs time to gel. Currently they are weak in FT%/STL/BLK, and pretty middle of the pack everywhere else, aside from a sterling FG%. They've faced a very tough schedule so far, as four of their first five opponents have had winning records. What's strange is that almost every player on the roster is outperforming their pre-season expectations. O.J. Mayo has been great, Chandler Parsons is dropping in 3PT, DeAndre Jordan is more than serviceable again, Thaddeus Young is emerging Mo Williams is averaging 7.1 AST, David Lee is a double double machine. Even Metta World Peace is useful with his 1.8 STL and 2.3 3PT. The retooled Knights haven't won a game yet, but they are an encouraging winless team, if that's possible. Note: The rest of the Silverhawks division is tied at 3-2, leaving the Knights way behind the eight ball already.
Funk Coalition (1-4)
After an encouraging first win, the reconstructed Funk Coalition have been in a tailspin. Playing a strange brand of fantasy, the Funk dominate in FG%, punt FT% and 3PT, have stellar AST numbers, but can't play enough defense, or score enough to pick up victories. The recent trade of Marc Gasol and Tyreke Evans should give th GM Jon more big men to deploy, but something is deeply flawed here, as results have been a headache for fans and front office alike. Dwight Howard has been as good as advertised with 18.8 PTS, 11.5 REB, 2.8 BLK, 59.5 FG% but rumors are that his goofy personality is not sitting well with the stoic leadership provided by Rajon Rondo. Russell Westbrook is back up to 8+ AST but rumors are he could be headed out of town soon. The early season stumble of the gate could have killed the Coalition's playoff hopes already, as they are in a very tough division. Basically, the Funk suck.
Super Shocker (1-3-1)
It could be time to go back to the "Super Horizon" nickname for this franchise. Their current iteration can put the ball in the hole, but are light on the boards and assists, and about average everywhere else. Not having the services of John Wall and Andrew Bynum hurt of course, but there could be more going on here. The front line can't protect the rim, as Tyson Chandler and Nikola Pekovic are averaging only 1.8 BLK per game. Dwayne Wade, Paul Pierce, and Rudy Gay are still scoring, but their auxiliary stats have dipped a bit, plus Pierce and Gay are shooting horrifically from the field. After starting off 0-3 though, Thien's team picked up a quality win and tie against Squirtle Squad and Half Man Half ImAsian recently, so there is a light at the end of this tunnel. A third straight division title for Super Shocker is not out of the question here, even with the early season hole they've dug themselves into.
Human Amoebas (0-5)Eric-A's team can't shoot; not from the field, the charity stripe, or the three point line. They have trouble rebounding, they don't pass the ball, and they are dead last in points scored. Hey at least they're leading the league in the TO category! Facing oppponents who were a combined 17-8 has not helped one bit. With Derrick Rose, Eric Gordon, and Dirk Nowitzki with big fat "O's" next to their name, there isn't much light at the end of the tunnel here. Or wait, is there? I mean, We are high on rookies Harrison Barnes and Andre Drummond, but both are at least one year away. Austin Rivers has been disappointing, but he's getting the reps to find out if he has any NBA career ahead of him. Coach Eric-A is living and dying -- mostly the latter -- with Monta Ellis, DeMarcus Cousins, and Paul Milllsap as their replacment stars. Until the Amoebas can get some their actual superstars healthy, they could be in contention for a winless season.
Jedi Knights (0-4-1)
GM Chris hasn't dipped into the free agent pool yet this season, but a lot of pre-season trades, as well as a recent exchange of Wes Matthews for Greivis Vasquez means this team needs time to gel. Currently they are weak in FT%/STL/BLK, and pretty middle of the pack everywhere else, aside from a sterling FG%. They've faced a very tough schedule so far, as four of their first five opponents have had winning records. What's strange is that almost every player on the roster is outperforming their pre-season expectations. O.J. Mayo has been great, Chandler Parsons is dropping in 3PT, DeAndre Jordan is more than serviceable again, Thaddeus Young is emerging Mo Williams is averaging 7.1 AST, David Lee is a double double machine. Even Metta World Peace is useful with his 1.8 STL and 2.3 3PT. The retooled Knights haven't won a game yet, but they are an encouraging winless team, if that's possible. Note: The rest of the Silverhawks division is tied at 3-2, leaving the Knights way behind the eight ball already.
Funk Coalition (1-4)After an encouraging first win, the reconstructed Funk Coalition have been in a tailspin. Playing a strange brand of fantasy, the Funk dominate in FG%, punt FT% and 3PT, have stellar AST numbers, but can't play enough defense, or score enough to pick up victories. The recent trade of Marc Gasol and Tyreke Evans should give th GM Jon more big men to deploy, but something is deeply flawed here, as results have been a headache for fans and front office alike. Dwight Howard has been as good as advertised with 18.8 PTS, 11.5 REB, 2.8 BLK, 59.5 FG% but rumors are that his goofy personality is not sitting well with the stoic leadership provided by Rajon Rondo. Russell Westbrook is back up to 8+ AST but rumors are he could be headed out of town soon. The early season stumble of the gate could have killed the Coalition's playoff hopes already, as they are in a very tough division. Basically, the Funk suck.
Super Shocker (1-3-1)
It could be time to go back to the "Super Horizon" nickname for this franchise. Their current iteration can put the ball in the hole, but are light on the boards and assists, and about average everywhere else. Not having the services of John Wall and Andrew Bynum hurt of course, but there could be more going on here. The front line can't protect the rim, as Tyson Chandler and Nikola Pekovic are averaging only 1.8 BLK per game. Dwayne Wade, Paul Pierce, and Rudy Gay are still scoring, but their auxiliary stats have dipped a bit, plus Pierce and Gay are shooting horrifically from the field. After starting off 0-3 though, Thien's team picked up a quality win and tie against Squirtle Squad and Half Man Half ImAsian recently, so there is a light at the end of this tunnel. A third straight division title for Super Shocker is not out of the question here, even with the early season hole they've dug themselves into.
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