Playoffs / Toilet Bowl: RD2

Playoffs
Chamberlain: #1 Sour Snails (19-0) vs #3 Fat Jubas (11-7-1)
We hinted that maybe Fat Jubas was the better team with two regular season defeats of Another Bad Creation, and they proved it again with a close upset in the first round. It came down to a pure PTS battle and CJ McCollum, Chris Paul, and Nicolas Batum out dueled Kevin Durant, JJ Redick, LaMarcus Aldridge, and Dwayne Wade. Impressive win for Jubas and now they get to face the juggernaut that is Sour Snails. Needless to say, the new-look Snails wiped the floor with Fob Stars. Oh yeah, new acquisition Dirk Nowitzki dropped 40 points versus Portland. I guess he wants (another) SlamNation championship.

Russell: #1 Team Spade (15-4) vs #2 Death Star (11-6-2)
No real upsets in the other conference but we’re looking at a possible Brother Bowl II as Thien’s Death Star overcame a W-L disadvantage to sort of upset Chunk Monkeys. New franchise center DeMarcus Cousins contributed 7 STL/BLK and that was huge in this matchup, especially since Evan was down Jae Crowder. Then again, maybe it just came down to hot shooting as Rudy Gay, Michael Beasley, and Josh Richardson (who?!) combined for to shoot 44/77, a 57.1 FG%. #4 seed Soup Dumplings put up a surprising fight against Team Spade — with Bismack Biyombo averaging 15.7 REB and 3.3 BLK — but lost out to Spade’s balanced scoring. Now we’ll get to see our only #1 versus #2 matchup for a Finals appearance!

Toilet Bowl
Russell: #3 Funk Coalition (6-13) vs NJ All-Stars (4-14-1)
Over in the Russell Conference, both higher seeds got upset as Funk Coalition beat an ailing MoRRie’s Pogiboys squad — and had Anthony Davis shut down for the season on Sunday — and then NJ All-Stars took care of So Buckets pretty handily behind a huge Paul George outburst. Now #3 Funk and #4 All-Stars will face off for the right to a top draft pick. Note: All-Stars traded Tobias Harris to Funk two weeks ago, so this should be interesting…

Chamberlain: #1 LA Buffy (9-9-1) vs#3 Squirtle Squad (3-15-1)
As expected, #1 seed Buffy waxed #4 Jedi Knights behind Isaiah Thomas and surprising turns by PJ Tucker and Lance Stephenson. A short handed Squirtle Squad was able to upset Silent Crows behind the offensive powerhouse that is Zach LaVine! And yes, there was a Nik Stauskas sighting as the ex-Wolverine played four games for Brian’s team. With Chandler Parsons ailing, it’ll be hard for Squirtles to pull off another upset but if they can, it’ll be a well deserved victory.