The Ecstasy and the Agony

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It's four weeks into our SlamNation season and after a week of heated debate and some settings snafus, we're ready to launch into the meat of the season. Let's take a look at our 4-0 and 0-4 teams. There are two of each and strangely, one per division. So without further ado, let's get it on!

Sour Snails (4-0)
Oh it's nice to have the King. I'm gonna tell you right now, the best team in the league is sitting right here. Let me wow you with some early season stats. First in three point shooting and assists. Second in blocks and steals. Third in points scored. If you're counting at home, that's five categories where the Sour Snails are elite level. So if you can't get to top three in one of those categories, you've already lost to the Snails (on paper). And how about my retarded pre-season prediction that the Snails would have "almost no chance to win any rebounding battles." They are ranked fifth in rebounds too! Gerald Wallace has been a beast at 12 REB a game, and Josh Smith is at almost nine per, with Lebron and Channing Frye chipping in six or seven apiece.

Remember how much we liked the all athlete trio of Lebron, Gerald, and Josh? Well they are combining for four plus STL and BLKs per game. Add in Corey Brewer's equally quick hands (2.0 STL) and the Snails are off the races. The real find of the early season for Trieu has been Channing Frye -- with a shout out to Chris Douglas-Roberts. The skinny "center" is averaging 2.7 3PT and almost one block and steal. Teamed up with Aaron Brooks (2.0 3PT) and Danilo Gallinari (3.0 3PT), the Snails bombs away from the perimeter. I imagine a game featuring the speedy Snails to be run and gun, full of dunks, long range shots, spectacular steals, monster weak side blocks, and many Sportscenter highlights. I'd pay premium prices to watch those games, wouldn't you? If the Snails have a chink in the armor, it's that their weaknesses are pretty distinct. They are near the bottom in both percentage categories and second to last in turnovers. But hey, you don't have to be perfect to be winners right?

Korea! Korea! (4-0)
As predicted, the Transformers have been a powerhouse division. Heading into last WK4, both Korea! and Squirtle Squad were riding 3-0 records. But Squirtle lost in a battle of undefeated teams, to Sour Snails, so we turn our laser focus onto Team Korea. We had been excited to see the team Steve put around Dwight Howard since pre-season and four weeks in, he's at the top of the charts. To nobody's surprise, the team looks a lot like the Orlando Magic -- or dare we say it, the Spurs? Team Korea is very strong on the boards and protects the rim like Fort Knox (4th in REB, 5th in BLK). Offensively, they space out the floor with excellent three point shooting while keeping their turnovers low. The Koreans are predictably terrible in FT% with Dwight and they have some problems scoring, at least statistically -- ranking 12th in PTS -- but they've won three of their four PTS category matchups so far and we attribute their scoring woes to the early season inaction of Antawn Jamison.

All those three point shots do turn into some horrific FG% sometimes because three of their top five players (Jason Kidd, Vince Carter, and Rodney Stuckey) are all in the low 40%. However, they are producing in other areas (Kidd and Jason Richardson both average 2+ 3PT a game) and best of all, Korea is winning with their formula. Early season surprise Erick Dampier has translated into help for Dwight on defensive end, averaging 2+ BLK a game -- in a contract year of course. All this and the road ahead looks pretty good as Manu Ginobili is making a return to action while the waiting game for Antawn Jamison has resulted in ten games worth of 20 PTS, 8.7 REB, 1.2 STL, and 1.5 3PT. So, with Steve's activity on the free agent lists and a deep roster, we see no drop off in their performance. Mothers of Korea, fire up the BBQ, your boys are in for a long and successful season.

Chunky Monkeys (0-4)
It hasn't been easy for the Monkeys so far. Their franchise player, Chris Paul, took a stumble early on and is out for another few weeks. You can't replace a fantasy superstar like CP3 so predictably, the Monkeys have been winless out of the gate. Preseason expectations had the Monkeys thriving in an uptempo small ball lineup with some rebounding power, but that hasn't turned out to be accurate. The Monkeys are purely small ball, ranking dead last in REB, BLK, and FG%. CP3 won't help in any of those categories, even as he returns. The good news is that Evan's team does have good 3PT, STL, FT%, and potentially AST when Paul is back. For a team predicated on running and gunning, their TO rate is actually pretty good at middle of the pack, which is great because their point production isn't overly high for a run and gun team.

The Monkeys almost won in WK4 versus the Fobsters but lost by a handful of blocks or one 3PT. Other than that one week, they've been run off the floor. A big problem is that the front line is not doing stellar, with Mehmet Okur and Rasheed Wallace underachieving -- an understatement in Rasheed's case. The two of them only average about twenty points combined, even if they do toss in almost three 3PT per outing. Andrea Bargnani has been really good in the early going, and is at 16.7 PTS, 6.5 REB, 1.6 3PT, and 1.1 BLK. And all those Trevor Ariza doubters? Well, he's been stellar, highlighted by his 2.2 STL and BLK per game. The great news is that Chris Paul is back and looks like a force already. And speaking of forces, Monta Ellis has been insane in his comeback year, with two 40+ point games and averages of roughly 25 PTS, 5 AST/REB, and 2.4 STL. With his top players back, Evan can look forward to a win soon. Maybe.

Morrie's Pogiboys (0-4)
It looks like an uphill climb for the Pogiboys again, but they've been here before and built their way toward a championship through good management and patience. It's not going to be easy though as the Pogiboys have some significant weaknesses. For one, thirteen is a horrifically unlucky number for them. They are ranked 13th in FG%, FT%, and STL. Add in their three 12th place rankings in PTS, REB, and TO and they are fighting hard to stay competitive each week. The good news? Well, if middle of the pack in 3PT and BLK is good news, then Alvin will take it. One thing for sure, they are lacking AST big time as they are second to last in that category. This might all sound bad but looking over their roster, the Pogiboys show a lot of promise.

A large part of their winless season so far is due to the fact that they've had to deal with injuries to Caron Butler, Devin Harris, and Tyrus Thomas. Franchise cornerstone Amare Stoudemire is treading water a bit but is still at 19 PTS, 7.8 REB, and 1.1 BLK per. What is really exciting about the Pogis is that they have Brandon Jennings, the absolute steal of the draft. Despite cooling off a bit recently, he's the clear ROY and has become the face of the franchise in Milwaukee while averaging 21.3 PTS, 5.8 AST, 2.3 3PT, and 1.1 STL. And young centers Roy Hibbert and Spencer Hawes are definitely keepers, even if they've been a little erratic. Alvin has been relying on Steve Blake and Ramon Sessions in the backcourt but that will change as Devin Harris makes his return. The mercurial Charlie Villanueva holds down the backup swingman position and could potentially get better. So there's hope here, even if most of this points to a less then stellar chance for Alvin to defend his title. But anything is possible and the season is still very young.

Update: Alvin also wanted me to note that he lost his two starting SGs to season ending injuries, Kelenna Azubuike and Raja Bell.