Rise of the Decepticons

Seven weeks in, the standings for this volatile division are exactly inverted from how they ended up last season. Up is down, down is up. Let’s take a look! [Pre-season Transformers look]

Eron, Joven, and Chandler (5-2)
In their second season in SlamNation, EJC jumped out of the gates at 4-1 before drifting a little back to Earth recently. Still, they’ve faced four other 5-2 teams and emerged a respectable 2-2 against them. Holding their own against tough competition is the mark of a team that’s going to compete all year long. For a franchise that only notched six wins all last season — and a mere five wins in 2012 — this winning stretch has to be reassuring.

EJC is the rare team led exclusively by forwards. Blake Griffin, Carmelo Anthony, Jeff Green, and Derrick Favors lead the team in GP and the top eight player rotation consists of six players with some type of forward eligibility! Ricky Rubio paces the team in AST and STL but Eron, Joven and Chandler are pretty weak there, ranking near the bottom of the league in both categories. However, all those big men mean they are high on REB/BLK, and there’s plenty of scoring on-board too. Nick Young and Ray Allen are around to sling some 3PT but short of Danny Granger coming back strong, EJC is lacking in the backcourt department something awful. Derrick Favors has emerged to the tune of 13.5 PTS, 9.2 REB, 1.4 BLK, 1.2 STL, and 52.2 FG%. While his Jazz teammate Enes Kanter hasn’t fared nearly as well, GM Lucas was able to unearth Jordan Hill for some excellent hustle stats. We’re still not entirely sold on the Green for Jeff Teague swap, but there’s not denying that this team has been rolling and will remain in contention for a division title.

Half Man Half ImAsian (5-2)
Nipping at EJC’s heels is Half Man Half ImAsian, who has some very interesting statistical strengths and weaknesses. They currently lead the league in REB and FG%, are strong in FT%/BLK/TO, and can’t shoot 3PT or accumulate any AST. On paper, this team is suffering from erratic help from anyone not named Kevin Durant, LaMarcus Aldridge, or Greg Monroe. There’s an especially big hole at point guard as the rotating spot features Randy Foye, Nate Robinson, and one game of Mario Chalmers. That’s not good. Tony Allen and rookie Ben McLemore share the shooting guard and backup guard positions but with J.J. Redick out, both have been pressed into service. There's no easy way to say this: McLemore has been quite disappointing. Could Oliver already be regretting drafting McLemore #1 overall ahead of Victor Oladipo, Michael Carter-Williams, and Trey Burke?

The good news is that Amir Johnson has been throwing up some eye popping stat lines during his last seven games: 17.1 PTS, 8.1 REB, 1.6 BLK. Along with Anderson Varejao, Johnson has helped mitigate the loss of JaVale McGee. And of course, Ersan Ilyasova won’t heat up till March or April as has now become tradition. All in all, Half Man Half ImAsian has become an intriguing semi-big ball team with Aldridge having a career year, plus the Monroe, Varejao, Johnson trio punishing front lines. Coming off a seven win season last year, they are just happy to be trending upward. However, how far can this team go with such a weak backcourt? Seriously, Randy Foye has played a team leading seven games at lead guard. Someone trade this team a point guard!

Squirtle Squad (3-4)
We thought Squirtle Squad would have their typical stroll into the playoffs but it looks like they’ve lost too many pieces this off-season and are struggling to stay around 0.500. Some of the regression has been by design, as Brian went heavy on young additions. However, Tobias Harris has been injured, Patrick Beverly averages nice STL but is stuck in a time share, rookie Kelly Olynyk hasn’t been near ready, and Brandan Wright is averaging 19.0 PTS but he’s only suited up for one game. Add in injury plagued Deron Williams and Bradley Beal and it’s easy to see why Squirtles have been hurting, and have gone 1-3 over their past four weeks.

So far Squirtles are ranked low in FG% and FT%, can’t REB or STL, and are absolute last in PTS. They have Serge Ibaka keeping them average in BLK but he needs more help than Nikola Vucevic can provide him with. Vucevic has been a 14.1 PTS, 11.4 REB, 1.1 STL, 1.0 BLK, 53.1 FG% monster so far though. (It would have been intersting to see this frontline with Brook Lopez and/or Greg Monroe still on board.) There is a silver lining to all this though. Williams, Harris, and Beal are all back from injury. The Greek Freak, Giannis Antetokounmpo, has been getting some playing time and that could prove very interesting very soon. With all his pieces back, Brian could soon pilot his slow starting team back to the top. We wouldn’t bet any money against that happening certainly. Greeeeek Freeeeeak!

LA Buffy (2-5)
We tried to say that Buffy was over the hill two years ago. They subsequently went 13-6 the following year and almost won a championship. Now they’ve lost four of their last five and are about to go three rounds against teams that are currently 17-4 on the season. They are last in FG%, last in STL, don’t have any areas of strengths save slightly above average in REB/BLK, and have suffered nagging or long term injuries to seven players who have suited up for them. Currently I see four players with “O” next to their Active Stats page.

There isn’t a 20.0 ppg scorer in sight. Heck, Joe Johnson leads this team in GP and points per game with 15.5 per game. Tim Duncan, Carlos Boozer, and Chris Bosh are all taking it easy so far this season for a variety of reasons -- and none of them are young. The only bright spot has been Tristan Thompson, who has been a nice surprise with 11.4 PTS, 10.0 REB, and um, 43.3 FG%. For a team of mostly big men, ranking last in FG% is embarrassing. Jeremy Lin has found his NBA game returned to him but quite frankly, Jameer Nelson has probably been a better fantasy point guard. Kirk Hinrich and Raymond Felton have been thrown into the fire, but both are, as you guessed: injured. Buffy isn’t headed toward a lost season necessarily but it could be time for a revamp or perhaps a reevaluation at least. Then again, last time we doubted Roger he came back strong so it's probably time to shut my mouth. Go Buffy!

Everyone is a Winner/Loser

Well this is exciting. The entire Voltron division is 2-4, with no clear winners or losers. While it’s great that everyone in SlamNation has gotten out of the winless column, I’m real intrigued by what’s happening in Voltron as it’s turning out to be our version of the putrid Atlantic division. Let’s take a peek. [Pre-season Voltron look]

Inept Henchmen
We weren’t entirely sure where Henchmen were headed before the season, with a dispersal roster and a draft that was veteran heavy. Well, now we know: They’re headed down and are near the bottom in PTS, REB, AST, and STL, with only an above average ranking in TO. Still, they nominally lead the division right now and that puts them in playoff contention! The bad news is that first round pick Kevin Garnett has only averaged 6.5 PTS and 7.5 REB in his way way over the hill season — and he’s still played 17 games for Henchmen, out of necessity. Also, Kenneth Faried has taken a step back statistically, along with his Nuggets. The really awful news is that franchise player Derrick Rose has been relegated to the bench for the entire season, setting this team back even more.

At least Dirk Nowitzki has returned to semi-franchise status, albeit with much lower REB than we're used to, and gunners Jamal Crawford and Eric Gordon (averaging a sneaky 1.7 STL) have been about as good advertised. Andrew Bogut has put up some monster rebounding numbers of late, and his 1.7 BLK are encouraging. Also, Harrison Barnes could be poised for a lot more playing time with Andre Iguodala out indefinitely. We’re not sure why Gerald Wallace and Thabo Sefolosha are still on this team, but a rebuild is in order here. We hope Trevor is ready to tackle this big feat, but it’ll be an exciting push for either the playoffs or the Toilet Bowl either way. Also: There's an empty roster spot on the bench, pick someone up man!
Advice: Tank hard, trade all remaining assets, and go for the full rebuild.

MoRRie’s Pogiboys
At this point we have to consider the idea that Alvin is tanking every season just to get all the assets. I mean, he’s got a newly acquired Brook Lopez (20.5 PTS, 1.9 BLK), Roy Hibbert annihilating the boards and opponents’ shots (3.0 BLK), plus the insane sophomore year emergence of Anthony Davis, and he’s still only 2-4. I mean, that frontline is amazing! Plus he’s got ROY candidate Victor Oladipo — 14.1 PTS, 5.0 REB, 3.6 AST, 1.8 STL, 0.9 BLK/3PT over the past month — and the surprise near double double emergence of Miles Plumlee. In addition to all that, John Henson could be on the way to becoming JOHN HENSON! if he keeps his 2.1 BLK up. Sure, Otto Porter Jr. could be a bust, J.R. Smith has regressed, but the pluses should outweigh the negatives right? We honestly have no idea how Alvin isn’t tearing up the league right now, maybe he hired Jason Kidd to be the coach or something. Heck, Mike Conley and Brandon Jennings (17.5 PTS, 7.8 AST, 1.8 STL, 1.9 3PT, 40.4 FG%) haven't even been mentioned yet!

Pogiboys is bottom four in 3PT, tops in BLK (by a HUGE margin), and just about average everywhere else. With assets everywhere, this team should be way better, but maybe locker room chemistry or behind the scenes shenanigans is weighing the team down. Or Alvin is tanking to get another high draft pick in the upcoming loaded draft. Come on, fess up before we expose your not-so-secret scheme!
Advice: Move some of those excess BLK for other pieces, or figure out exactly why all this talent can’t mesh together. Or just wait it out and see if this group can start winning eventually.

Beast Brawlers
Pre-season, we said that Thien’s team was "consistent winners but treading water without playoff success.” It looks like that could change now as he’s been aggressive in pursuing trades to reshape his roster. Moving Rudy Gay and Tyson Chandler for Damian Lillard has resulted in a nice 1-2 punch with Lillard and John Wall in the backcourt. Beast Brawlers is top five in AST/3PT/STL, and first in FT%. They have the makeup of a small ball team while also being respectable in TO/PTS, and are even top three in BLK — although losing Chandler will drop that some. This fast paced team even has Andrea Bargnani gunning away with his 1.0 3PT and 1.4 BLK average. It all makes for a very interesting, and theoretically competitive team.

However, having Bargnani and Robin Lopez be two of your top three in games played probably isn’t a recipe for success. Dwyane Wade has been having a great season but has sat out most back-to-backs, limiting him to sixteen appearances, and there’s rumors that he’s on the trading block. Paul Pierce’s game has calcified and there don’t seem to be a lot of young pieces ready to move into primetime spots here. Maybe Andew Bynum recent mini-resurgence is a sign of bigger things, but his health will always be an issue. There are role players of value here, such as Martell Webster's 3PT and Mario Chalmers' STL, but this team is likely still going somewhere and nowhere at the same time.
Advice: Time for a revamp and rebuild! Wall and Lillard are two huge assets but the rest of this roster is either too old or too ineffective. Still, this team is awfully high ranked in a lot of categories and that could mean there could be some light on the horizon.

So Buckets
Last year’s division winner is not looking great so far this season — they started off 0-3. If they were an NBA team, they would be playing absolutely no defense (second to last in STL/BLK), prone to turning the ball over (bottom three in TOs), and unable to hit their freebies despite being guard heavy. Twenty point scorers Kyrie Irving, Evan Turner, and DeMar DeRozan keep them semi-competitive in PTS, while a group effort fuels decent REB work but it's not enough. Granted, this team has been hit hard by early season injuries. First off, Larry Sanders has been horrible, and is now gone for weeks. (Seen his hilarious slip sliding dance video?) Same with Andre Iguodala. That can’t help the defense.

Pau Gasol is shooting 41.7 FG%, which is only barely offset by his 9.5 REB and 1.2 BLK. Nikola Pekovic has been non-existent as a BLK presence, and while he’s got good center value, he’s not exactly protecting the rim. And it's safe to say that keeper holdover Mo Harkless has been an absolute dud. Still, there are some nice surprises: Evan Turner (20.3 PTS, 6.7 REB), Jodie Meeks (13.5 PTS, 2.2 3PT), and Jared Sullinger (13.3 PTS, 7.0 REB) are all outperforming their expectations. It's too early to give up on anything, but it looks like Josh will have to fight uphill to climb back to league wide competitiveness.
Advice: Wait for Larry Sanders and Andre Iguodala to return and see what happens. Although we suspect this team needs to shore up the STL/BLK categories a bit to return to the top. The good news: 2-4 is tied for the division lead!

Heroes and Zeros

I know it’s early but we’ve already got a few frontrunners and a few teams who have stumbled out of the gate. Fat Jubas and Spade, the past two champions, are both sitting pretty at 3-0 while Jedi Knights, Fob Stars, and So Buckets have yet to pick up a win. Let’s take a look.

Fat Jubas (3-0)
Coming off of a huge trade for Chris Paul, it must comfort Eric to know that his team hasn’t had any trouble continuing their winning ways. They haven’t really faced a challenge yet so far this season and the trio of CP3, Gordon Hayward, and Nicolas Batum have been adding contributions across the board. Gordon, especially, is in the midst of a breakout season with 19.3 PTS, 5.9 REB, 4.5 AST, 1.5 3PT and 1.3 STL. While this team isn’t strong on scoring, they are first in FT% and AST, plus strong in REB and BLK. The front line of Jonas Valanciunas, David West, and Brandon Bass aren’t flashy but they’ve been obviously effective. If would be nice if swingman Tyreke Evans could find his game, but so far he’s been slow to integrate himself in New Orleans. Also: Steve Blake is averaging 7.3 AST to Steve Nash’s 4.8. Ouch. We’re pretty sure Fat Jubas will be one of the season long contenders, and with Paul vying for a MVP award, it’ll be hard for anyone to take down this team.
Weakness: Pushing the pace on this disciplined team is the way to go, as a sharpshooting team can outscore them in bunches, capitalize on this team's lack of 3PT, and maybe take them out in STL.

Spade (3-0)
We warned you before the season didn’t we? Spade is here to play and now that we’ve got a few weeks of stats to look into, they are proving to be just as awesome as feared. This team is top five in seven categories, with a top three ranking in PTS, FG%, 3PT, and REB. Their only weakness is a below average ranking in BLK, and the nastiest thing is that all this production isn’t coming at the expense of TOs, as they are ranked middle of the pack there. Aside from the strong keeper core, GM Randall also unearthed Kevin Martin, Arron Afflalo, and Kyle Korver in the draft. Those three combine for 59.3 PTS and 9.0 3PT per outing. It’s hard to pick who is having the better start of the season, Martin with 24.4 PTS or Afflalo with 21.7 PTS and almost five REB/AST per game. Also lurking is the soon to return Kobe Bryant. Plus, whoever thought Eric Bledsoe might flop with more minutes is way wrong. Bledsoe is killing it!
Weakness: We’re not sure, but Chunky Monkeys almost took them down this past week by out AST/STL/PTS and tying them for BLK. Then again, “almost” meant a 5-3-1 win anyway.

Fob Stars (0-3)
Jimmy’s team was 0.500 last year but they’ve sunk down to the bottom again, even after a good draft. What gives? Marcin Gortat has been good with 12.7 PTS, 9.9 REB, 1.8 BLK in his new Wizardy home, and Shawn Marion is quietly having a throwback season with 8.1 REB, 1.4 STL, 1.1 BLK. Heck, even Isaiah Thomas is contributing with 17.8 PTS, 4.9 AST, and 1.7 3PT. The problem seems to be a lack of identity on this team, and no star power. Gortat, Zach Randolph, and Joakim Noah sound like an imposing frontline but Fob Stars is nowhere near the league leaders in any big men stats. In fact, they are absolutely last in FG%. That is mostly attributed to Kemba Walker and Gerald Henderson’s combined 29.0 shots per game on about 35.0 FG%. This team can’t shoot at all. And it’s not like they are getting production for all those shots either, as they are second in last for 3PT, sixth in TO, and fifth in STL. Fob Stars will get Louis Williams — and eventually Trey Burke — back, but those two would seem to exarcebate the problem. And let’s not talk about Dion Waiters, who has been good, but his minutes could be slashed after an immature outburst. Maybe this team needs to have a players only meeting?
Solution: Keep plugging away and try to get a superstar via the Toilet Bowl. Or blow it all up and move the bigs and try to play small ball with a roster that deathly in need of some type of vision.

Jedi Knights (0-3)
It’s a dark time for the Republic. Lum’s team is firmly mired in Empire Strikes Back, mid-movie, when everything is going wrong. These Knights have problems scoring, shooting free throws, and um, just about everything else. The only category the Knights are above average in is TO, which makes sense since there’s a lot of nothing going on here. (Their next best category is STL, in which they are ranked #8 in the league. That is not good.) What’s stranger is that there are a lot of nice pieces on this team. For one, rookie Michael Carter-Williams has busted out of the gates to the tune of 17.4 PTS, 7.6 AST, 5.4 REB, 2.6 STL, 1.9 3PT. That’s star material, even on 38.9 FG%. OJ Mayo, David Lee, Thaddeus Young, Chandler Parsons, and DeAndre Jordan with his 13.2 REB and 2.2 BLK are all doing good things. Sure, Greivis Vasquez could step it up but he’ll get better. In short, we don’t know why the Knights are so bad, but something needs to be revamped. This team is just calling for a Dr. Jack makeover. Fob and Jedi face off in WK5, so one of them will get off the winless column by then. Unless they tie...
Solution: The Jedi need to find a Yoda to come in and mold all these pieces into a winner.

So Buckets (0-3)
It’s not good when your team loses 0-9-0, like So Buckets did to Spade in WK2. Did we mention that Josh is the one who invited Randall into SlamNation? Nice way to pay him back Randall! So far So Buckets haven’t even accrued enough category wins to win one week, much less get an actual win — 1-7-1, 0-9-0, 3-6-0 weekly scores. After a stellar division winning year last season, why have the wheels fallen off so early? Well, for one LARRY SANDERS has transformed into “larry sanders” and was averaging 3.7 REB and 2.0 BLK before getting injured from a nightclub excursion. Pau Gasol and Nikola Pekovic are strong frontcourt presences but Gasol’s days as a 20 ppg scorer look to be done. Heck, he’s at 13.0 this year, less than Pekovic’s 13.7 ppg. The backcourt trio of Kyrie Irving, Evan Turner, and DeMar DeRozan are all big scorers but they haven’t been able to give this enough oomph to push up their small men categories, even with multi-category Andre Iguodala on the wings. So Buckets can score, as evidenced by their #4 ranking in PTS, but they are middle of the pack everywhere else, and very weak in STL and BLK. Also, Maurice Harkless and his 9.6 PTS, 4.5 REB, 1.2 STL could make a case for the most underperforming keeper now that Markieff Morris and Gerald Henderson have proven capable of having some moments.
Solution: Patience, as the team seems to have enough pieces to pull itself out of an early season hole. Well, once Larry Sanders shows up.

Oh Brother!

Just two weeks into the NBA season and we already got another big move! Trieu and Thien combined to move quite an intriguing set of pieces, especially after there were talks of a four way trade being explored. In the end, it was the reigning R.O.Y. Damian Lillard who will exit stage left, in return for Rudy Gay and Tyson Chandler. (The two brothers last combined in a trade for Raymond Felton.)

• ID#39: Sour Snails trade Damian Lillard and Samuel Dalembert to Super Ninja for Rudy Gay and Tyson Chandler

First up, how about Super Ninja, who has already undergone a name change today (currently they are "Revamped Team”) and is likely going through a few more monikers before we’re done this season. Thien’s team is the only one with a win in Voltron division so far but they’re clearly looking to make some major moves as they revamp a steady winner that is good but always falling short of contender status. It seems like owner Thien has demanded some post-season success!

It’s a little too early to look at team stats, but Revamped Team currently leads the league in STL, is fifth in AST, and average or below average everywhere else. It looks like they’ll add more to their strengths with Lillard, who is having an outstanding start of the season and averaging 21.1 PTS, 5.4 AST/REB, and 3.6 3PT. He’ll pair with John Wall and Dwyane Wade to be a powerful backcourt. Paul Pierce will now have the starting small forward position all to himself, with Corey Brewer and his 1.9 STL backing him up in the rotation.

A quick free agent trigger has had Thien spin through Kenyon Martin, Zaza Pachulia, Jordan Hamilton, Jeremy Lamb, Steve Blake, Marcus Morris, and Jason Smith already. In fact, they are second in the league with 25 moves — second to Trieu’s 27 moves. It seems like they’ve already dumped Samuel Dalembert and picked up Martell Webster. Dalembert’s 8.1 PTS, 6.6 REB, 1.0 BLK, and 0.9 STL would seem to have some use but he’s already off the roster.

Sour Snails got a nice surprise with a quick return from injury from Russell Westbrook, making Lillard semi-expendable. Trieu has been eager to add another big to pair with DeMarcus Cousins, and it seems like Tyson Chandler will be that answer. A team source said, "Chandler is the key as we can boost our defensive stats with the move and still have stud point guards. We're bringing balance to a small ball core but still have the offensive firepower to take everyone else down! Hahahahaha!" [Some of that quote might be added in by the editor.] Chandler is out for quite a few weeks but upon his return he'll add in a ton of REB/BLK, and Snails can easily play small until he recovers.

The Snails are near the top of the charts in FG%, FT%, 3PT, STL, and PTS and Gay will add to all of that with his 19.3 PTS, 1.9 ST, 1.3 3PT, excellent FT%, plus add in 7.4 REB and almost a BLK per game. It would seem like Gay will take over Klay Thompson’s starter position at SF, and we think this could mean that Thompson’s time with Snails is limited — especially with Trevor Ariza currently going crazy, approximating a pretty dead on impersonation of Gay so far this season.

The backcourt for Snails is still beyond strong with Westbrook, Stephen Curry, Monta Ellis, and Thompson, so it looks like Trieu is trying hard to diversify positionally while finding more bigs to plug into the lineup. Viva Vitor! We know Sour Snails is always gunning for a championship and we're excited to see how both of these teams will revamp on the fly while still racking up wins. Rumors are that Thien and Trieu are ready to move more pieces, so fellow owners, get on those trade channels!

Russell Conference: Voltron Division

#1: Inept Henchmen (1-17-1, 5-7)
Exit Human Amoebas, enter the Henchmen. A team that was literally littered with talent was deconstructed a bit as the dispersal draft cost the former Amoebas some big pieces. Still, Derrick Rose and Dirk Nowitzski are on hand and both are looking for huge rebound years. The fan base here is clamoring for a winner and new owner Trevor is aiming to bring a winning culture to a franchise that won a title just three seasons ago but have sunk to just one win last season. With that in mind, he drafted veteran stalwarts like Kevin Garnett, Jamal Crawford, Mo Williams, and Thabo Sefolosha to blend into his team. We know exactly what we’re getting from those four. All are arguably past their primes but could be overlooked value contributors. Heck, we’ve even started to believe in keeper Gerald Wallace, whom we previously expressed some doubt about. After he ripped into his new Celtics teammates after a pre-season game, we think he’s got the fire to return to glory. Fifth round pick Alex Len now looks like a steal post-Gortat trade, and third rounder Harrison Barnes has a bright future and he’ll get heavy minutes on a top heavy Golden State team. We’re not sure what this team will exactly play like, but it’s safe to say that if Rose, Dirk, and Eric Gordon can stay healthy, this team won’t stay inept for much longer. Also, huge points for the best logo in the league!
Status: Halfway between rebuilding and pushing for relevance. A veteran heavy team is looking to win now.

#5: MoRRie’s Pogiboys (8-10-1, 8-4)
If Pogiboys hits the Toilet Bowl again, we’ll know Alvin is just trying to win the best rookies year after year instead of gunning for a SlamNation title. Actually, a case could be made that going back into the Toilet Bowl is exactly what Pogiboys is planning to do. Their draft was so aggressive on youth and upside that we think they’re trying to replicate the 2009 Human Amoebas model of drafting. What can you say about a draft that consisted of Victor Oladipo at #2 overall, Otto Porter Jr. in RD2, followed by John Henson, Dennis Schroeder, Luigi Daatome, and Miles Plumlee? We count five rookies and and one second year player who played thirteen minutes a game last year. This is a super youth movement! Free agent pickup Chauncey Billups was snapped up to provide leadership and to buy drinks for all these underaged guys. There’s a balanced keeper core of Brandon Jennings, Mike Conley, J.R. Smith in the backcourt and Anthony David, Roy Hibbert, and new trade acquisition Brook Lopez in the front court, but we’re not sure where Alvin will find two other players to fill out the starting lineup.
Status: Transitioning with an eye toward next year, again. If even two of the young’uns pan out, this team will be explosive soon.

#7: Super Ninja (9-9-1, 8-4)
Thien’s team started off 4-9-1 last season before ripping off five straight wins. Still, they ended up in the Toilet Bowl and then got bounced by Pogiboys, leaving them to draft seventh overall. They used that pick on Brandon Knight, who could have sneaky value as a third guard behind John Wall and Dwyane Wade. Mario Chalmers and Darren Collison will also contend for some backcourt duties. Ravaged by injuries to Tyson Chandler and Andrew Bynum last year, Super Ninja still proved that they are the steadiest team in Voltron division by eeking out a 0.500 record. As covered in the franchise players article, they’ve also shown rare stability by having four of their original players dating back to the 2010 season. Also, in an amazing stat, Thien has never suffered a losing season in four years! Each year he changes his team name, more than once sometimes, and that seems to be the path to success. Look below:

• 2010: Hot Gems (9-9)
• 2011: Slam’N Dragon (11-8)*
• 2012: The Horizon (8-4)*
• 2013: Super Ninja (9-9-1)

That’s two division titles denoted by the asteriks and also a Toilet Bowl win in 2010 that netted them John Wall. That’s a hefty record of success — and lots of fresh jersey sales each year — but with a core that is aging a bit (ie. Paul Pierce and maybe Wade), it’s time to make a push for true contender status. Toward that end, Thien decided to throw his lot in with Andrea Bargnani in RD2, and also brought in Robin Lopez, Corey Brewer, and free agent pickup Marco Belinelli. This is clearly a team looking to win a ring now, damn the torpedos!
Status: Consistent winners but treading water without playoff success.

#10: So Buckets (10-9, 3-9)
In year two of his reign, Josh took his 3-9 team and piloted it to a winning record, a division title, and a playoff run that was only derailed by injuries to Kyrie Irving and Pau Gasol. Not bad for a sophomore campaign. This year So Buckets is gearing up for another division battle and looking for sustained success. Nikola Pekovic and DeMar DeRozan bring exactly what this team needs at C and SG, and there’s hope that Michael Kidd-Gilchrist can grow into a viable forward. Another point guard is sorely needed to keep up with Irving, but last round pick Ramon Sessions is probably not the answer. Then again, this team features two swingmen who average about five assists per game (Evan Turner and Andre Iguodala) and a sweet passing big man in Gasol, all of which helped So Buckets to a top AST ranking last season. If new keeper Moe Harkless can sustain his versatile late season stat line, that will make him a nice complement to a team that has lots of odd pieces but mesh nicely together. Adding Pekovic, DeRozan, Kidd-Gilchrist, Derrick Williams, and Kris Humphries represent a nice haul for a team looking to fill in the pieces. A team that’s stronger on the court than on paper, So Buckets have Irving and Larry Sanders to build around, and they are in an interesting space where they are growing yet already winning. Here’s to more of both!
Status: Division title favorite and trending upward. True contention is still around the corner?

Chamberlain Conference: Silverhawks Division

Two former champions have come from this division, but at the other end of the spectrum are two teams that have traditionally been doormats. Is the shift of power beginning, or will Sour Snails and Fat Jubas continue to duke it out for Silverhawks supremacy? [2013 Preview]

#2: Jedi Knights (3-14-2, 2-10)
It's been a dark place at the bottom for Lum and his faithful Jedi Knights. A few of their bigger trades have turned out awful. I mean, would anyone say "yes"again to Dirk Nowitzki for Andray Blatche, Mo Williams, and this year's number three overall? Ahem, no comment. Still, with two very high first rounders, this was the off-season for Knights to rebuild quickly. Lum tapped Carter-Williams and Jimmy Butler with the third and fourth overall picks. We love Butler’s upside and he’ll pair with incumbent SG O.J. Mayo to provide a lot of good numbers. Carter-Williams can’t shoot but he can do everything else so he should be a nice source of AST/STL next to Greivis Vasquez. Without a second rounder, the Knights added Nene, DeMarre Carroll, and Evan Fournier with the rest of their draft. They also grabbed PJ Tucker off the free agent pile to flesh out their roster. Carroll and Fournier are pure speculation picks so they’ll ride the pine till they can prove something. Adding Nene to a front line of David Lee, Thaddeus Young, and DeAndre Jordan seems like a perfect fit. This teams needs to build some momentum or the fans might soon turn. Five total wins in two seasons is a tough pill to swallow, even as GM Lum works hard to strengthen a keeper core that needs an injection of talent.
Status: Rebuilding, always rebuilding. It only seems right that this sci-fi themed team will win the draft rights to Andrew Wiggins right? Ho Ender!

#8: Fob Stars (9-9-1, 1-11)
Rebounding nicely from an atrocious one win season, Jimmy righted the ship and went 0.500 last year. Not a bad jump. Now to maintain that upward trajectory! Through the draft, Fob Stars got some nice pieces. Now that Mr. Gortat is going to Washington, he’ll add to a very strong frontline that already includes Zach Randolph and Joakim Noah. Gortat makes Fob Stars immediately much more competitive in BLK alongside Noah. First round pick Trey Burke will start the season injured but he’s got Rookie of the Year potential and he could be another nice scoring guard next to Kemba Walker, Dion Waiters, and Louis Williams. Jeremy Lamb will get the shot to be the Thunder’s third scoring option. Gerald Henderson of all people was a keeper for this team, and it would be nice if Lamb could overtake his spot. We also think Isaiah Thomas could have a shot at heavy minutes in Sacramento. Could he elevate himself to keeper status? Perhaps on this team. Old steady Shawn Marion will be pressed into service at the forward positions, and he’s the lone SF on the roster unless you count Mike Miller, who is likely injured already. Overall, a strong draft and a team that isn't very far away from a playoff spot.
Status: Rebuilding but with lots of growth potential, especially if Burke is a hit.

#9: Fat Jubas (10-9, 9-3)
Eric won a ring two years ago and we thought they were on the downslope after that with headliners that were all old men. But a huge trade for Chris Paul has changed everything. Another aggressive trade during the draft brought in David West, who will solidify the PF position nicely. With Gordon Hayward, Tyreke Evans, and Nicolas Batum sticking around -- plus Steve Nash, who was dumped and then picked up again, Jubas suddenly has a nice blend of old and young. Plus they got a nice sixth round steal of C.J. McCollum, who could prove to be quite good after he returns from injury. Third rounder Tiago Splitter will be the first big off the bench, or he'll start if Jonas Valanciunas can't fill the hole left by Marc Gasol in the middle. Amare Stoudemire is around in case he’s ready to return to fantasy relevance, and last pick rookie Archie Goodwin is a deep sleeper that only Suns’ fan Eric knows about. I think. Brandon Bass and rookie Tim Hardaway Jr. were brought in to fill the roster off the free agent market. Both could have nice value.
Status: Going for the title, rebuilding on the fly in an attempt to win two rings in three seasons.

#13: Sour Snails (14-5, 4-8)
Perhaps the most decorated team in SlamNation, Sour Snails has one championship ring, two Finals appearances, a Toilet Bowl final, and got another division title last season along with a #1 Chamberlain Conference playoff seeding. (But they were the owner who traded away a young Lebron James. Although to be fair, Trieu used a piece in that trade to fully reload last year.) A trip to the 2013 Finals looked likely for Sour Snails until they got narrowly upset by Buffy in the conference finals. Despite trade rumors swirling, Trieu elected to stay put this off-season and play out his draft hand. First round pick Danny Green is another gunner on a team chock full of shooters -- Stephen Curry, Klay Thompson, Damian Lillard, Monta Ellis -- and it looks like this will just be a Splash Family. Desperate to add some big men help for DeMarcus Cousins, Trieu tabbed Jared Sullinger, Samuel Dalembert, and Chris Kaman in the middle rounds. All three guys have injury histories but only one of them really needs to work out here. The Snails don’t have any small ball big men so it looks like they’re committing to a traditional lineup for now. We’re not that high on late picks Al-Farouq Aminu and Josh McRoberts but either could surprise. Trieu (mistakenly/drunkenly) jumped the gun on free agent Steve Blake a couple of days ago, which just goes to prove that a Lakers fan will always try to cheat the system to get what they don't deserve. Ahem, Pau Gasol trade. Yep I'm still bitter... Oh right, semi-new team co-captain Russell Westbrook will be eventually back to lead this group of insanely talented guards. Who's worried?
Status: Poised to conquer the conference again, with a draft that yielded another quality bomber and some serviceable big men for DeMarcus to cannibalize if things go wrong.

Russell Conference: Thundercats Division

Officially the toughest division in the league, Thundercats has sent three teams to the playoffs each year, with Funk Coalition being left behind each time. This could be the year for change however, as one squad has likely decided to Riggins for Wiggin or um, Hungry for Jabari. Also, this is the home of the defending champs! [2013 Preview]

#6: Funk Coalition (8-9-2, 3-9)
After two losing seasons — the only team in Thundercats to have any losing season in the past two years — Funk Coalition finally has the team they’ve been rebuilding for. A big ball lineup that features Dwight Howard, Al Jefferson, Josh Smith, and Andre Drummond will be out to destroy backboards and annihilate shots. The backcourt will be without Rajon Rondo for an unknown amount of time though, so it’s only Tony Parker at the controls. Eschewing any outside shooting whatsoever, Jon picked up Iman Shumpert and Avery Bradley to fill out the backcourt. Both are tremendous NBA defenders, and hopefully that translates into plenty of STL. Funk also traded down in the draft three times, picking up a few extra picks that translated into those two plus Andrei Kirilenko, Kevin Seraphin (less intriguing with Marcin Gortat now on the Wizards), Jared Dudley, and Thomas Robinson. First round pick Anthony Bennett will be in a playing time log jam and will likely need time to develop, unless he’s a big fat bust… We’re not sure if Funk would have been better served by not trading down and securing the likes of a David West or Caron Butler, but time will tell.
Status: Rebuilt, but with a super big ball approach that is still in the testing phase.

#11: Chunky Monkeys (11-7-1, 8-4)
For a team that had 19 wins over the past two seasons, it sure seemed like Monkeys hit the reset button rather quickly. Perhaps sensing that his team was losing talent by attrition — Markieff Morris was an off-season keeper — Evan traded away Chris Paul and abandoned the small ball he’d been successfully using for years. In comes Marc Gasol and a whole slew of big men to accompany him. The question is, are late round picks Donatas Montiejunas, Vitor Faverani, and Taj Gibson the answer? All three smell like transition pieces. Luol Deng was a value selection in round one and it’s possible that Alec Burks emerges as a nice shooting guard but he’s not going to get much time behind James Harden, Wesley Matthews,  and a slew of quality point guards. After capturing the #3 playoff seed in last year’s Russell Conference, it sure looks like Chunky Monkeys is headed straight for the basement.
Status: Tanking (but won't admit it). With two first round picks next year, Monkeys are likely fighting for a loaded draft class.

#14: NJ All-Stars (15-4, 8-4)
In his second season as owner, Eddie hoped to win a title after a rookie season run that saw them sprint to the 2012 Finals. NJ All-Stars was led or nearly led the league in 3PT, REB, AST, STL, and PTS. Plus they were above average in FG% and FT%. Their only weak spots were BLK and TO. But then they got upset by division foe 100 Acre Wood Heffalumps in the first round. Ouch. With a keeper core featuring multi-everything LeBron James and Paul George, this team has a lot of bases covered. It seemed like this was the off-season for them to build on more strengths and get ready for another title run. Instead they swerved a bit by taking two rookies — Kentavious Caldwell-Pope and Nerlens Noel — that aren’t likely to help immediately, and another semi-young guy, James Anderson in the fifth round that we know nothing about. Last year’s off-season trade of Luis Scola and DeAndre Jordan resulted in this year’s RD2.2 Reggie Jackson, and he should contribute with Russell Westbrook out. J.J. Hickson is back for another spin, and Channing Frye and Trevor Ariza were also drafted. Do we prefer last year’s support players of Luol Deng, Isaiah Thomas, Hickson, AK47, and Al-Farouq Aminu better than Caldwell-Pope, Jackson, Frye, Hickson, and Ariza? We think so. It’ll be interesting to see what NJ All-Stars can do with a supporting cast that seems slightly weaker. We do love the long term potential of Noel though, who will be stashed away for next season.
Status: True contender. Always a favorite to win the division but fuming from a first round exit last season.

#16: Spade (9-8-2, 8-4)
After a stunning playoff run that saw them upset higher ranked teams in three straight rounds to win the championship, the former 100 Acre Wood Heffalumps have reloaded with new ownership and an even better roster than last season. Their championship win was the closest ever in SlamNation history, but Spade can silence any doubters by being the first repeat champion. It looks like new owner Randall is out to destroy all challengers by flooding his team with outside shooting. Kevin Martin and Kyle Korver are on-board, along with Danilo Gallinari, who will wait on injured reserve alongside Kobe Bryant. Last year’s point guard, George Hill, returns via the draft to run the team and he’ll team up with new addition Eric Bledsoe to form a strong backcourt. Arron Afflalo and Marcus Thorton were drafted in RD4&5 to hold the SG spot until Kobe returns. With Kevin Love, Al Horford and Paul Millsap up front, this team has all the pieces to repeat.  Plus, the new Lakers’ starting power forward, troubled retread Shawne Williams, is on hand to make appearances from the Spade bench. We heard he gives great cautionary talks about getting arrested and going to jail too.
Status: The odds on favorite to take it all, especially with Kobe on the bench waiting/lurking/scheming.

Chamberlain Conference: Transformers Division

Here we go, post-draft division previews, at the rate of one a day. We start with Transformers, a division that traditionally sees a lot of upheaval from year to year. It's also been a tough place to play as the teams have taken turns jostling for the division lead, with Half Man Half ImAsian being the only one not to win one yet. [2013 Preview]
Header formatting: #2014DraftPickPosition: TeamName (2013SeasonRecord, 2012SeasonRecord)

#3: Eron, Joven and Chandler (6-13, 5-7)
Already strong and balanced on the front lines — led by Carmelo Anthony and Blake Griffin — EJC went heavy on guards and swingmen. Ricky Rubio will run with Nick Young and Vince Carter alongside him, with Jarrett Jack coming off the bench for some scoring pop. We think Swaggy P and Ex-Vinsanity’s 3PT shooting will be perfect complements for this roster. It’s a shame Danny Granger is dinged up, but he’s not needed at the beginning of the season with newly acquired SF Jeff Green slotted into the utility slot. Cody Zeller went ahead of fellow rookies Anthony Bennett, Trey Burke, and Kentavious Caldwell-Pope in the first round and he should have the chance to play big minutes out of the gate. Sixth round pick Jordan Hill could carve out some supplemental REB/BLK stats on a team that’s stacked with bigs. We like how Lucas really went for lots of shooters to balance out a frontcourt heavy roster that features Anthony, Griffin, and Utah youngsters Derrick Favors and Enes Kanter.
Status: A team trending upward with a playoff spot within reach if the young bigs work out.

#4: Half Man Half ImAsian (7-10-2, 8-4)
Oliver won the Toilet Bowl and jumped on Ben McLemore. He’ll need McLemore to start his ROY campaign early as Nate Robinson and J.J. Redick were drafted and then immediately slotted into the starting lineup — with Tony Allen as a change of pace backup. MVP candidate Kevin Durant is poised for a monstrous year but he’ll need some help to pump this team into the postseason. Ersan Ilyasova is back to being a superior stretch forward but even he could fight for consistent minutes on this deep frontcourt. There were rumors that some teams were moving up to select Amir Johnson but Oliver got him in the second round and he’s likely a low double double candidate. (Admission: I was one of those teams coveting Johnson.) With LaMarcus Aldridge, new trade acquisition Greg Monroe, Anderson Varejao, and JaVale McGee, Half Man has a ton of big bodies to throw at people so it’s going to be up to McLemore to quickly step up to the spotlight. Michael Beasley is also on this team to provide chaos. And to hold the drugs.
Status: Contender, with the addition of Monroe and growth from McGee. Needless to say, we love McLemore and Johnson this year too.

#12: Squirtle Squad (12-6-1, 10-2)
The most consistent team in the division, Brian’s team has been the class of the division for the past two seasons. They won the Trasformers title two years ago and was just one game out last year and would have made a strong title push if not for injuries up and down the roster. With a strong, balanced, and somewhat newish keeper core -- Bradley Beal, Tobias Harris, Nikola Vucevic are all new, while Greg Monroe and Brook Lopez were traded away -- Brian drafted a lot of upside guys: Kelly Olynyk, Patrick Beverly, Giannis Antetokounmpo, and Steven Adams. All four will start on the bench while their elders take the floor to win games. First and fifth rounders Wilson Chandler and Manu Ginobili will start before maybe giving way to the youngsters. Most of the advancement from this team will come from within as the Squirtles need both Deron Williams and Ty Lawson to stay healthy, plus continued growth from Beal and Harris to push into contender status. The real question we should be asking is if Antetokounmpo's nickname is the Greek Freak or The Alphabet?
Status: Always a regular season beast, Squirtle will be playing for postseason success this season.

#15: LA Buffy (13-6, 5-7)
The Spurs lost their championship because they couldn’t secure one rebound; Buffy lost theirs because they couldn’t put up four more PTS. A dream season that started off 11-1 ended in a heartbreak in the 2013 Finals. Now what? Well, Buffy is filled to the brim with veterans so they will push ahead for another title shot. Last time they went 13-6, in 2011, they collapsed to 5-7 the following season. Roger is hoping that doesn’t happen again. They’ll need another big season from Tim Duncan but Roger got him some help in the form of Tristan Thompson and Omer Asik. Asik is almost for sure to be traded, so he’ll have solid numbers once that happens. Those three, along with Chris Bosh and Carlos Boozer, give this team a strong frontcourt. First round pick Joe Johnson will step in alongside Jameer Nelson, Raymond Felton, and Jeremy Lin. Adding more veterans to the mix, Roger traded away three lower round picks for a RD3 that he used to select Caron Butler, who could have sneaky good value in Milwaukee and he’ll start at SF. Jordan Farmar was clearly drafted because Roger is a Lakers’ homer. In our fantasy league, Roger drafted Jordan Cameron and I semi-mocked it by declaring that I had to Google him. Now look at JORDAN CAMERON! So in that vein, I say to Roger: "Who is John Jenkins?"
Status: Still stinging from the closest Finals loss ever, Buffy is reloaded and dying for revenge.

Who Are the True Franchise Players?

Since 2010 was our reset year, after three years of the old cycle, I wanted to take a look at which of those franchise cornerstones were still with their original teams. Here is that original draft article, plus the link to that entire draft. As you'll see, most of those guys were jettisoned.

Round One (2010)
"Nothing surprising up top. Lebron, CP3, and Dwayne Wade in short order. This being a dynasty league, taking LBJ was definitely the right move despite CP3's fantasy dominance. And while Kevin Durant and Danny Granger are hyped as the next best things, Wade is still a numbers monster -- if he can stay healthy. The only semi-surprise was Lakers' fan Steve passing up Kobe Bryant at five (very defensible since Kobe ain't that young anymore) and nabbing Dwight Howard. If you draft Dwight, the rest of your draft has to be carefully orchestrated and built around his strengths. It was a bold move and could pay big dividends as many of the lower drafting GMs were hoping to get Howard.

A slew of big men went in the latter half of the first round, in this order: Bosh, Nowitzki, Stoudemire, Jefferson, and Gasol. We'll see if that was the correct choice since all of them come with some red flags (age, injury, situation). The big shocker in Round One was Mikey's drafting of Gilbert Arenas. He's counting on the Hibachi returning to fantasy prominence but this was a huge gamble with Arenas' injury history. In a slightly smaller surprise, Suns superfan Eric-L takes old man Steve Nash, who has another two years max at elite level."
-The Jump Off (2010)-

Where Did They Go:

• #1 Lebron James, traded from Sour Snails (2011)
• #2 Chris Paul, traded from Chunky Monkeys (2014)
• #5 Dwight Howard, traded from Eron, Joven and Chandler, formerly 2005 NBA All-Star Team (2013)
• #6 Danny Granger, traded from Inept Henchmen, formerly Human Amoebas (2011)
• #8 Chris Bosh, traded from Fob Stars (2012)
• #9 Dirk Nowitzki, traded from Jedi Knights (2012)
• #10 Deron Williams, traded from Funk Coalition (2011)
• #11 Amare Stoudemire, traded from MoRRie's Pogiboys (2013)
• #12 Brandon Roy, traded from Buffy (2011)
• #13 Al Jefferson, traded from Squirtle Squad (2010)
• #15 Gilbert Arenas, traded from NJ All-Stars, formerly Nande? ReBuRonSAN (2011)
• #16 Steve Nash, cut from Fat Jubas' keeper roster (2014)

So who's still around on their original teams? It's a short list: Dwayne Wade, Kevin Durant, Kobe Bryant, and Pau Gasol. Steve Nash technically made it back to the Jubas after he was unceremoniously dumped this off-season, but being selected in the normal draft -- even with Eric's 2014 RD1 pick -- isn't the same. It's safe to say that Nash lost his franchise player status.

Of the remaining original franchise guys, we are confident that Durant will likely stay with Half Man Half ImAsian for the next decade or so, but there's a decent chance that Wade could be traded eventually. I mean, CP3 just got moved so anything can happen. Will Kobe and Pau get to retire their numbers with their original teams? (Kobe is back on the same squad after being up for the dispersal draft this year.) Everyone else clearly had little to no loyalty to their original first rounders.

While we're here, let's take a look at how keepers have evolved over the past few seasons. We did this this right after our first season, Keeper Analysis 2011, so let's do it again. Bolded names are players drafted in the first six rounds that still remain as keepers with their original team.

Teams with the most top six players still around: Super Ninja, who amazingly still has four of their top six. Dwayne Wade, Paul Pierce, Andrew Bynum, Rudy Gay. In order to boot. That's great drafting by Thien. Buffy, Human Amoebas, and 100 Acre Wood Heffalumps all retain three of their original draft picks.

Teams with zero players left from their top six rounds: Chunky Monkeys, Squirtle Squad, NJ All-Stars, Fat Jubas, and Eron Joven Chandler. (Although the NJ All-Stars had Andre Iguodala moved off due to the dispersal draft.) The Squirtles moved four of their top six through trades: Al Jefferson, Carmelo Anthony, Tyreke Evans, and Blake Griffin, which is impressive.

A lot of teams are down to one lone original keeper, especially after this off-season: Sour Snails (Steph Curry), Oliver (Kevin Durant), Fob Stars (Zach Randolph), Funk Coalition (Tony Parker), Pogiboys (Brandon Jennings), and So Buckets (Pau Gasol). And how about that OJ Mayo? He surprised as an unexpected long time keeper. Jedi Knights have kept Mayo -- and David Lee -- for the haul.

Now to take a look at the lower round selections that ended up being keepers still -- not necessarily with their original team. As you can see, James Harden, taken late in 2010 RD11, has clearly gone from scrub to All Star in impressive fashion. Plus he's still on the team that drafted him, Evan's Chunky Monkeys!

Rodney Stuckey and Luol Deng, both 2010 RD7 picks, almost made the cut for this list but were dumped this past off-season. Spencer Hawes and Jamal Crawford are new keepers this year, both playing for their non-original teams. Hawes had never been a keeper before, but Crawford was one in 2011. And how about that Kyle Lowry, 2010 RD11.12 pick and still going strong!

Born to Assist

We thought the off-season trade pyrotechnics were over but in one day, Eric managed to turn the league on its head with three trades in a row! On Friday morning, SlamNation woke up to the news that Fat Jubas and Eron Joven and Chandler had agreed to terms on a "Jeff (Green) for Jeff (Teague)" swap. That was exciting enough as Eric needed a young point guard to pair with Steve Nash -- now back on the Jubas after being cut and then re-selected with Jubas' first round pick.

With the draft underway, Jubas moved up in the draft to RD2 -- by trading away 2014 RD3 and RD4 to Funk Coalition -- to grab big man David West. Another nice move, as West had 17.1 PTS, 7.7 REB, 1.0 STL, 0.9 BLK in a comeback season last year. Oh but we weren't done yet, as rumors swirled that Eric had his eye on an even bigger prize.

Just a little after midnight, a gigantic blockbuster came through the wire: Fat Jubas had acquired Chris Paul in exchange for Marc Gasol and Jeff Teague, plus they gave up a first rounder in next year's loaded draft class. Wowza. In less than twenty four hours, Eric had turned Jeff Green into Chris Paul through smoke and mirrors. Chris Paul, a top five fantasy player and the top player at an important position. Chris Paul, who just signed a fat contract with the Clippers and averaged 16.9 PTS, 9.7 AST, 2.4 STL, 1.1 3PT, and with sterling percentages last year. Chris Paul, who… well, you get the idea. We love CP3!

• ID#34: Fat Jubas trade Jeff Green to Eron Joven Chandler for Jeff Teague
• ID#35: Fat Jubas trade 2013 RD3 and RD4 to Funk Coalition for their 2014 RD2
• ID#36: Fat Jubas trade Marc Gasol, Jeff Teague, 2015 RD1 to Chunky Monkeys for Chris Paul, 2014 RD6, and 2015 RD2 

Let's look at what these trades did for every team's roster. The Jubas will have a gaping hole at center now, just a year after acquiring their answer there. Gasol averaged 14.1 PTS, 7.8 REB, 1.7 BLK, 1.0 STL, with great percentages and low turnovers. While Gasol's raw numbers weren't eye popping, his extreme efficiency from the center position was perfect for Eric's team. Currently, ESPN has Gasol ranked as the #8 player in fantasy, right in-between Kyrie Irving and Paul George. If Jonas Valanciunas, summer league MVP, can break out this year, then Eric can breathe easier. Until then, he'll have to rely on drafting some holdovers for the pivot position.

Adding CP3 to the backcourt obviously elevates this team's guard play. Steve Nash should have a bounce back year AST-wise at least, and that will help the Jubas get more competitive there. Last year they were ninth in the league in AST, and that was with Nash as the leader, averaging a paltry 6.7 AST. We can look for Jubas to become one of the league leaders in AST now. Paul will also help tremendously in the STL department, where Jubas was ranked a paltry thirteenth. Like we said, a huge upgrade in the backcourt. After an off-season of jettisoning veterans, Eric looks like he's come right back into contention mode.

Now let's look at the Chunky Monkeys, who are clearly in a revamping mindset. Our last small ball team has officially waved the towel on that strategy. Gaining Gasol and Teague are a nice start to restructuring their roster, but we think Evan probably should have made this trade pre-keepers. I mean, he could have kept David West instead of Markieff Morris if his timing was better. Still, we commend his bold move in trading away his franchise cornerstone. With Teague averaging a very respectable 14.6 PTS, 7.2 AST, 1.5 STL, and 1.1 3PT, Evan won't lose too much of CP3's production while gaining a top center in Gasol.

The Monkeys are now in need of more bigs, as they are flush with guards: James Harden, Teague, Jrue Harden, Goran Dragic, and Wesey Matthews. We're very excited about what else is to come for this franchise as they find a new direction. Also, that valuable 2015 RD1 from the Jubas could be huge. If next year's draft is as loaded as rumored, then it will be a valuable pick even if Jubas make it into the playoffs. We don't want to throw the T-word around, but we think Chunky Monkeys might be aiming for a quick tank and a rebuild. Anyone else?

As for Eron Joven and Chandler, we're unsure why they let Teague go. We are high on Jeff Green's all around fantasy potential, but a Teague and Ricky Rubio pairing seemed like a nice backcourt of the future for Lucas. Now EJC will be very forward heavy with Green, Carmelo Anthony, Blake Griffin, and Derrick Favors. That's actually a pretty enviable rotation, especially with emerging Enes Kanter at center. Perhaps Lucas has read that the supply of point guards is super deep right now and moved accordingly. Jeff Green averaged 12.8 PTS, 3.9 REB, and almost 1 3PT/STL/BLK a game last season, but we can expect those stats to jump this year with all the shots and playing time he can handle in Boston. We're intrigued how Lucas fleshes out the rest of this roster, and how he'll build on a 6-13 record.

Overall, thanks to Eric, Lucas, and Evan for giving us a very exciting SlamNation day! Can we top that? Note: It looks like October 18th is the day for huge rebuilds. Last year, Funk Coalition pulled off three trades on the same date, with moves that involved Gasol, Dwight Howard, Carmelo Anthony, Al Jefferson, Blake Griffin, Jeremy Lin, and Kenneth Faried. Who will step up to the plate in 2015?!

On a minor trade note, Funk Coalition swapped picks to move down the 2014 draft even further, collecting extra low end picks by moving their 2014 RD2 and RD3. We hope there's more action in this draft to come from all parties.

• ID#36: Funk Coalition trade 2014 RD3 (via Fat Jubas, ID#35) to Buffy for their 2014 RD4, 2014 RD5, and 2015 RD5

Two New Owners

When two former champs -- including the defending champs -- exit the stage, who do you bring in to replace them? Jose and Eric-A both announced that they were vacating their teams at the end of last season. Panic ensued but after a long and arduous search, one that included an all expenses paid jaunt to Africa to look for prospects -- ala The Air Up There -- our selection committee have turned up two bonafide star owners: Trevor and Randall.

• Trevor is a huge Clippers fan and is also a writer -- the best kinds of people on Earth, obviously. We are excited for his debut on this very blog. Goodness knows somebody else needs to blog here besides me. Maybe everyone should contribute an article once in awhile. Ahem. Either way, Trevor has been eyeing SlamNation for awhile and we're excited to have him. Fun fact: Trevor apparently reads and writes Anglo-Saxon. I have no idea what this means, but it sure is fascinating! 
• Randall is a sixteen year fantasy basketball veteran, the rare Utah Jazz fan and has played in multiple fantasy leagues with Josh -- and I believe a football league or two with me. He's from New Jersey, religiously follows Linsanity, and wants to up the league ante to more cash, which seems like a declaration of "I'm gonna win this whole thing in my rookie year" to me. We should all be immediately afraid.

Dispersal Draft Rules & Results
Trevor and Randall did a quickie dispersal draft, this time a simple six round snake draft -- unlike two years ago when LeBron James was an obvious prize and we had to move things around picks wise to accommodate. Randall wanted to go #1 and so Trevor kindly took the #2 position. See below.

A quick team preview of the new keepers:

Spade (Randall)
Representing for the defending champs is no small feat, especially being thrown into Thundercats, aka the division of death, that featured all four teams winning at least eight games last season, but it looks like Spade will be just fine. In fact, they could be the pre-season frontrunners out of the gate. With a frontcourt featuring Kevin Love and real life teammates Al Horford and Paul Millsap, this team will be rock steady in PTS, REB, and even STL for a big man trio.

Love doesn't block many shots but mini-Wade Eric Bledsoe gets almost a block per game, which is an interesting team dynamic as the point guard out blocks the power forward, while the power forward has more three point range. We love Bledsoe and Kawhi Leonard in the starting backcourt, as both bring tons of STL and useful stats across the board, even if they are not huge scorers. PTS will be sixth man Kobe Bryant's job. We weren't sure where Kobe would be dispersal drafted but he's going to be pissed that he slid down to the fifth round. Even if Kobe misses a few weeks/months, his incredible scoring and all around numbers are going to be the perfect icing for a keeper core that has a great mix across all fantasy categories.

Interestingly, half of this team's core were Heffalumps' main holdovers -- Kobe, Horford, and Kawhi. Spade will basically keep that main core of the old Heffalumps, minus Faried, and add Love, Millsap, and Bledsoe. We're intrigued by what Randall's team can do on the (fantasy) court, and quite frankly, frightened more than a little.

Inept Henchmen (Trevor)
Trevor's team has slid right into the former Human Amoebas' high risk, high reward strategy. The Amoebas were buried by injuries the past two seasons but were always super talented on paper. Five of the top six dispersal draft picks were from Amoebas, and six ex-Amoebas were drafted versus just four ex-Heffalumps.

If all things go right injury wise, Derrick Rose and Eric Gordon are a perfect backcourt pairing. (Sidenote: We were mildly surprised to see Clippers' fan Trevor pass up Eric Bledsoe.) The two of them bring everything to the table you want from the PG/SG positions. A rejuvenated Dirk Nowitzki has lost his center eligibility from a few years ago but he's going to bring lots of small ball power forward stats. Whatever Dirk lacks in REB/BLK, Kenneth Faried will bring as an active double-double who basically just runs the floor to dunk and to pile up nice STL/BLK numbers. In theory, Gerald Wallace would fit that mold too but we saw how far Crash fell last year. Even with plenty of playing time in Boston, we're not sure if he was a better pick than say, last dispersal pick Kawhi Leonard. Still, why nitpick? For my Celtics' sake, I hope Wallace gets forty minutes a game and he accrues 12 REB, 2 STL/BLK for Trevor and Boston doesn't win a game all season!

With a big hole at center, Trevor reached into the free agent ranks to grab injury prone Andrew Bogut, who has played 109 combined games over his past three seasons. When he's on the court though, Bogut's a defensive force. All in all, Inept Henchmen has a nice blend of pieces but most of the team's success will come down to injuries. If Rose, Gordon, and Bogut can stay on the court, this team can challenge for a post-season berth and the Voltron division title.

2014 Schedule

The new schedule has been adjusted -- and released -- and as always, it's semi-weighted for division finishes. That's what Alvin tells me anyway. I'm not sure exactly how that works, but it's to help parity or something. All I know is that I keep losing, and I don't know why! [Click for archived "schedule" posts]

What we haven't ever looked at is how that weighted schedule plays out. Each 19 week regular season consists of the following:

• 6 Division games
• 6 Conference games
• 7 Out of conference games

For example: Eron, Joven, and Chandler finished 6-13 last year, good for last place in Transformers division. This upcoming season they'll play everyone in their own division twice, and then their fellow Chamberlain Conference foes, the Silverhawks division, for six games. They face off against the Jedi Knights and Fat Jubas twice, while only matching up against Sour Snails and Fob Stars once each. Ideally they'd play everyone in the opposing Russell Conference once, but with only seven out of conference games, EJC skip out on facing 100 Acre Wood Heffalumps this year.

What that means is that if you're in a tough division -- and to a lesser extent, a tough conference -- you're constantly battling against each other year after year, just as it should be. In fact, the last three games of your team's season will always be against fellow division mates, which can make for great head-to-head games for post-season contention. Also, six of the last seven games are against division or conference rivals, which makes the back half of the season very important for determining the two conference wild cards and jostling for division titles. Take a look at how the season schedule plays out each year:

• WK1-10: Two division games, three in-conference games, five out-of-conference games
• WK11-19: Four division games, three in-conference games, two out-of-conference games

Pre-Draft Moves: Supply and Demand

Prior to the keeper deadline in previous seasons, there's always been a lot of shuffling as owners who had surplus talent moved to extract value from their roster before the six keeper max. Some great deals could be had too, as future fantasy stars like Ricky Rubio and Ty Lawson were available for the low low price of future picks. Compared to the previous two years, this off-season was actually pretty quiet. While there were a lot of players mentioned in talks, in the end it was Squirtle Squad who made the only two trades.

• ID#31: Squirtle Squad trade Greg Monroe to Half Man Half ImAsian for 2015 RD1
• ID#32: Squirtle Squad trade Brook Lopez to Pogiboy for 2014 RD3 and 2015 RD6
• ID#33: League Mandated: Human Amoebas receive Heffalumps 2014 RD3 (originally Funk Coalition, Trade ID#18) and RD5 (originally Sour Snails, Trade ID#24). Update (10.18.13): Heffalumps receive Human Amoebas 2014 RD5.

With a roster that featured an overabundance of keepers, Brian chose to jettison two of his big men in exchange for three picks. Greg Monroe averaged 16.0 PTS, 9.6 REB, with 1.3 STL last season, a semi-breakout for him. His game is unique for a big man in that his block numbers are sub-par, and his FG% is at a measly 48.6%. It'll be a crowded frontcourt in Detroit but Monroe will be a nice building block for Oliver's Half Man Half ImAsian, where he'll split the post with LaMarcus Aldridge, Anderson Varejao, and JaVale McGee.

As for Brook Lopez, he re-established himself after a lost season due to injury and returned with 19.4 PTS, 6.9 REB, 2.1 BLK, with stellar 52.1 FG% in 74 games. His first All-Star appearance last season should have been a boon for his value but he was ultimately deemed expendable by Squirtle. (For Lopez, this is his fourth team in one calendar year. What's a guy gotta do to stick around?!) Alvin gladly snatched him up to pair with his young frontcourt consisting of Anthony Davis and Roy Hibbert. It's safe to say that they'll now be one of the league leaders in blocked shots.

To explain that last league mandated trade. With two new owners coming in, and Human Amoebas having traded away a lot of their picks -- while 100 Acre Wood Heffalumps had acquired two -- it felt only fair to switch them around and let each of them have their full complement of six picks. So while previous trades to other franchises were still honored, the commishes felt that shifting Heffa's extra picks to make up for Amoebas' deficiencies was the right move. On with the show! Update (10.18.13): A slight clerical error results in the same rationale for the trade, but now Heffas get Amoebas' 2014 RD5, meaning they'll give up two of their acquired picks but gain one.

Keepers: Chamberlain Conference

Time to look at the newly declared keepers for 2014. Last year we took a little spin through each division before the season started, giving a season preview for each squad, but with an expansion draft and then a real draft coming up, we may not have time for that. Instead we'll point you to those capsules from the beginning of the 2013 season -- how times change -- and just look at keeper holdovers. [ 2013 Silverhawks | Transformers ]

Silverhawks Division
Sour Snails
Trieu made huge moves last season, mainly acquiring a whole new set of players in exchange for Kevin Love. He hit jackpot with Rookie of the Year Damian Lillard and then another megatrade for Russell Westbrook gave the Snails a five guard lineup of Lillard, Westbrook, Steph Curry, Klay Thompson, and Monta Ellis. Stick those five around DeMarcus Cousins and we're excited to see where this high powered team can go. Off the roster from last off-season: Love, Josh Smith, Danilo Gallinari, Raymond Felton.

Fat Jubas
Eric (now the only Eric left in the league) underwent a big revamp too, one year after winning the SlamNation championship with a team that featured Steve Nash and Kevin Garnett. Now both are gone and it's rebuilding time. The lone holdovers, Nicolas Batum and Gordon Hayward are both high upside youngsters and Jubas now now feature Marc Gasol and Jonas Valanciunas on the inside with Tyreke Evans and Jeff Green providing mercurial potential on the wings. It's a fond farewell for Nash and KG, but their time as fantasy keepers is done.

Fob Stars
Last year's Fob Stars keepers included Michael Beasley, Emeka Okafor, and Chris Kaman so really, anything should be an upgrade this season. However, Jimmy was a bit slow to move on some trades -- we would have loved to see them be aggressive and get Greg Monroe or Brook Lopez, or both -- and will have Kemba Walker, Dion Waiters, and Gerald Henderson replacing the crap sandwich from last year. The other three holdovers are Zach Randolph, Joakim Noah, and Lou Williams. Can this team continue to upgrade its talent while remaining competitive? Time will tell.

Jedi Knights
We lauded Lum's offseason moves for Amare Stoudemire, DeAndre Jordan, Luis Scola last season but only Jordan proved to be keeper worthy. Now Lum will return Jordan with O.J. Mayo, Thaddeus Young, and David Lee. Greivis Vasquez was acquired via trade -- for Wesley Matthews -- and the other keeper is 2013's RD3 pick, Chandler Parsons. There's a bright future here, if Lum can nail his two first rounders this season, #3 and #4 overall.

Transformers Division
LA Buffy
Even while shuffling his lineup, Buffy remains a strong contender. Out the door goes Danny Granger and Elton Brand, replaced by Jameer Nelson and Raymond Felton -- acquired last mid-season for Andrew Bogut. GM Roger decided he needed to balance out his strong frontline -- Carlos Boozer, Chris Bosh, Tim Duncan -- and give Jeremy Lin some help in the backcourt. This team is still long in the tooth, but obviously effective.

Squirtle Squad
Brian revamped his keeper core quite a bit this past off-season with some big decisions. There was a lot of keeper worthy talent on the Squirtles' roster and management saw fit to trade away Greg Monroe and Brook Lopez. Deron Williams and Ty Lawson, along with Serge Ibaka, are holdovers but Bradley Beal, Tobias Harris, and Nikola Vucevic give this team some intriguing new pieces. Left behind was old stalwart Joe Johnson, who has clearly lost his All-Star luster.

Half Man Half ImAsian
A nice and easy offseason for Oliver. He kept a tight five of Kevin Durant, LaMarcus Aldridge, Anderson Varejao, Ersan Ilyasova, and JaVale McGee. With Rodney Stuckey no longer proving to be keeper worthy, a 2015 RD1 pick was traded away for Greg Monroe. We love the upgrade at here and this could now be an fearsome front line if McGee develops. And let's keep in mind that Oliver gets the #1 overall pick this season after winning the Toilet Bowl. Shock us with Anthony Bennett!

Eron, Joven and Chandler
After a big keeper shakeup last season, his first as an owner, Lucas finds some stability by electing to stick with Carmelo Anthony, Blake Griffin, Ricky Rubio, Jeff Teague, and Derrick Favors. New addition Enes Kanter is clearly an upgrade over aging Manu Ginobili, the Spurs' championship dream killer. We're excited to see this team grow from within.

Keepers: Russell Conference

Out of the sixteen first round picks last season, only six became keepers the following year. Here's the full list: Anthony Davis, Damian Lillard, Dion Waiters, Kenneth Faried*, Andre Drummond, Jonas Valanciunas. The * for Faried is assuming he gets kept by one of the new owners. Does that help value the strength of a first round pick? Who's the say really, as seven second rounders last year were on this year's keeper rosters: Kemba Walker, Thaddeus Young, Jeff Green, Jameer Nelson, J.R. Smith, Bradley Beal, Greivis Vasquez. Maybe even Harrison Barnes and George Hill pending new ownership decisions. [ 2013 Voltron | Thundercats ]

Voltron Division
So Buckets
Josh has slowly acquired some fantastic assets while rebuilding from his expansion season. Kyrie Irving is here to lead the way and last year resulted in LARRY SANDERS! being discovered. He's not the only new face as Moe Harkless will be kept too -- out goes Gerald Wallace and Darren Collison. Pau Gasol, Andre Igoudala, and Evan Turner remain from the previous season.

Super Ninja
There's something to be said for consistency. For the second year in a row, Thien is keeping the same six guys: Dwayne Wade, Paul Pierce, Andrew Bynum, Rudy Gay, John Wall, and Tyson Chandler. (The last players to break that up was Chris Kaman and Raymond Felton in 2011.) We could make an argument for DeMar DeRozan or Nikola Pekovic as keepers, but who would they replace? Now let's see if Thien can keep one team name for the whole season...

MoRRie's Pogiboys
Brandon Jennings, Mike Conley, and Roy Hibbert are back while Tristan Thompson, Marcus Thornton, and Brandon Knight are gone. Last year's overall number one pick, Anthony Davis, is a huge upgrade obviously, and we like a late move for Brook Lopez -- Alvin gave up 2014 RD3, 2015 RD6. New Sixth Man of the Year J.R. Smith is better than Marcus Thornton ever was, and we think Pogiboys will be able to add another special piece with their #2 overall pick in this year's upcoming draft.

Human Amoebas
This former champ, who looked absolutely unbeatable as recently as 2011, is now going to be sent to the meatpacker. Eric-A's team was never short on talent but injuries ground this team to dust recently. A huge trade for Kevin Love last season -- losing DeMarcus Cousins, Monta Ellis, Andre Drummond, Metta World Peace -- brought in another franchise piece to pair with Derrick Rose. We think the 2014 keeper core could have looked like this: Rose, Love, Dirk Nowitzski, Eric Bledsoe, Paul Millsap, and either Eric Gordon or Harrison Barnes. That would've been something. Instead the Amoebas are no more and the franchise awaits a new owner and keeper core!


Thundercats Division
NJ All-Stars
Lebron James is flanked by Paul George, Kyle Lowry, and Ryan Anderson again. Replacing Isaiah Thomas and Luol Deng as keepers will be Jose Calderon and Spencer Hawes. We are interested in GM Eddie's thinking as he tinkers with the perfect pieces to keep around an incredible forward combo of James and George. When you have King James onboard, there's not a lot else you need!

Chunky Monkeys
One of our die-hard small ball teams, the Monkeys are powered by Chris Paul, James Harden, Goran Dragic, and Jrue Holiday. A trade brought in sharpshooter Wesley Matthews last season, and he will take Aaron Afflalo's spot. The interesting thing is that Andrea Bargnani has been dumped in favor of Markieff Morris, a move we can't quite make a positive or negative call on yet. Strong man David West never fit on this team last year, and will be left to dangle.

100 Acre Wood Heffalumps
The returning champs abdicated the throne and would have left behind a keeper core built around an injured Kobe Bryant. It's safe to say that Al Horford, Kawhi Leonard, and possibly Kevin Martin would have been kept, but after that it would have probably been a combo of Kenneth Faried, Jamal Crawford, and maybe George Hill to displace Kris Humphries and Bismack Biyombo. All that is academic now as this team will be re-drafted.

Funk Coalition
After a year of rebuilding -- with a ton of trades -- Jon has the makings of a team that finally makes thematic sense. Russell Westbrook, Marc Gasol, and Tyreke Evans were moved aside for Al Jefferson, Josh Smith, and Andre Drummond. Those three will flank Dwight Howard to form a gigantic front line -- with Marcin Gortat left to dangle -- while Tony Parker and Rajon Rondo will collectively shoot the fewest 3PT out of any point guard tandem.