Showing posts with label Divisions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Divisions. Show all posts

2019: Re-Alignment

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Due to moving over to two conferences and no divisions, we're gonna do a slight re-align too, to balance out the conferences. I looked at keeper core scores, and top keepers, and then decided to switch So Buckets and Spade over to Chamberlain while Fat Jubas and Fob Stars slide over to Russell to take their place. We kept an eye toward preserving historical rivalries and making sure each conference still had some ex-champs to boast about.

Strangely our new auto-generated ESPN schedule is a mix of +5 out-of-conference games. So the schedule seems to do this no matter how many times I reset it:
  • One game each versus every other team (15/20 games)
  • Repeat five out-of-conference opponents for the last five weeks of the regular season (5/20 games)
Which means that if we have unbalanced conferences, one conference will just pound on the other. Thus, the slight-re-alignment. Thanks to Josh, Randall, Eric, and Jimmy for suffering the indignity, enjoy your new homes!

And a look at the would-be All-Star teams by conference (all seventeen gold players plus best player from Buffy, Fat Jubas, Fob Stars):

Mid-Season 2018: Thundercats

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An odds-on title winner runs rampant, momentarily stopped by a family member, while a former bottom dweller finally emerges from the depths. [Pre-season 2018]

Chunky Monkeys (14-1)
For awhile there, Evan’s team threatened to go undefeated this regular season, before getting upended by cousin Eddie in WK14. That’s good news I guess. The bad news for the rest of SlamNation is that James Harden is back and he just dropped a historic sixty-point triple double… Since building a super team two years ago, Monkeys have been focused on only one goal, the championship, so all this regular season success won’t mean much to their fans. After getting bounced in the first round after a one-loss season last year, coach Evan needs to stay focused. Let’s hope he doesn’t have any vacations schedule for April this year…

Returning a duo of Harden and LeBron James gives Monkeys the top two MVP candidates, and even with Kyle Lowry struggling, the emergence of sophomore Kris Dunn has given this team even more backcourt dominance. Moving on from Serge Ibaka to Clint Capela was also the right choice, keeper wise, as Capela is having a breakout season. With two MVP candidates, a strong frontline (Capela, Marc Gasol), a plethora of useful wings (Otto Porter Jr., Caris LeVert, Allen Crabbe) — not to meant a weakened Sour Snails, and injuries to DeMarcus Cousins and John Wall for Thien’s team — this version of the Monkeys better win the title! Or else...

Funk Coalition (10-4-1)
Despite commissioning this league for years and years, Jon’s team hasn’t had a winning season until now. In a stunning twist, Funk Coalition is actually good! They’re middle of the pack in most categories, lead the league in FG%, and are poised for their second playoff appearance. The payoff of winning two straight Toilet Bowls is finally here, as Karl-Anthony Towns and ROY candidate Ben Simmons are both franchise cornerstones.  This year’s draft also brought in a fine rookie, Jayson Tatum, who has flashed star potential from early on.

And while keepers Derrick Favors and Kentavious Caldwell-Pope have been wildly inconsistent, the return of Nikola Mirotic and the mid-season trade for Josh Richardson has replaced them in the lineup to delightful results. Freed from the albatross of punting four/five categories, Funk is on a month long winning streak and if D’Angelo Russell can find a way to return to his early season success, Jon’s team of many wings plus KAT and Simmons could finally make some noise in something other than the Toilet Bowl!

Swamp Dragons (7-6-2)
After winning a Toilet Bowl, the expected return is a franchise level player. Well, Eddie didn’t exactly get that. Instead he got the mystery that is Markelle Fultz and Swamp management must be regretting the decision to not grab Dennis Smith Jr., as previously considered. While Swamp waits to see what it has in Fultz, the climb back to contention continues, and with a 5-1 record in recent weeks — including four wins against top teams — this team is right on track.

The strong and diverse core of Paul George, Nikola Jokic, Dennis Schroder, Andrew Wiggins, Robert Covington, and Jusuf Nurkic bring a great balance to the team. The mid-season trade for Jeff Teague has filled in the hole left by the presumptive point guard of the future, and Eric Gordon is more than qualified to be the seventh-best player on this team. Add in the intriguing Taurean Prince and Swamp may not even need Fultz to play this season to escape the Toilet Bowl after three straight appearances. Although getting a glimpse of the #1 overall pick would be nice...

Team Spade (2-13)
After four straight seasons in the playoffs, Randall is headed toward his first Toilet Bowl since entering the league. The least number of wins Spade has had in those seasons has been twelve, and with only two wins so far, it’s likely Spade is slotted into our worst record for the seasons already. Why the dramatic fall? As always: injuries.

Kawhi Leonard has played nine games, Paul Millsap sixteen, Reggie Jackson and Dion Waiters have missed time. Kevin Love just broke his hand again. Ouch ouch ouch. Currently we’re seeing five “O” designations on this team and three “DTDs.” A full 75% of this team is hurt! Is it time for Randall to consider moving away from his stellar keeper core, or is it just about waiting for the perfect moment when everyone comes back healthy to challenge for a title? Unfortunately, the only title Spade will be fighting for is a Toilet Bowl one this year. But if they can win a high pick, this team could be right back to title contention in a hurry.

Mid-Season 2018: Silverhawks

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While there aren't any positional changes at first glance, once we dig in we'll see that Silverhawks are suddenly competitive as a division again, from top to bottom! [Pre-season 2018]

Sour Snails (9-6)
With six total losses, the Snails have lost more this season than their last FOUR seasons combined. They haven’t dipped to five-plus losses since 2013, which was way before their current streak of three-peat championships. Are the defending champs on the ropes? After busting out of the gate 4-1, Trieu’s team has been playing 0.500 ball, and are even on a two-game losing streak. Most troubling is that Snails only rank top two in FT% and Moves, which is weird since we’re used to seeing them dominate the leaderboard in just about every category.

While the trio of Steph Curry, Kevin Durant, and Jimmy Butler are still awesome, the insane depth here has been chipped away due to injury (Mike Conley), ineptitude (Nerlens Noel), and a change of scenery (Brook Lopez, averaging only 11.8 PTS) -- all three were trade acquisitions last year. Rookie Kyle Kuzma is leading this team in GP, and without his bright spark, we dare say that Snails would be floundering in total this season! However, a champ is still a champ until dethroned, so let’s not bury Trieu’s squad just yet...

Fat Jubas (8-7)
Chasing Snails for a division title is Jubas, who is coming off some struggles themselves, despite a winning record. They’ve already outpaced last year’s five-loss season, and with the early season loss of Gordon Hayward — plus a dozen missed games from Chris Paul — Jubas started off 2-4 before righting the ship recently and going through a four game win streak. A mid-season trade for Jrue Holiday has been a godsend as Holiday has helped steady the backcourt with career numbers, and strangely, Joe Ingles, Pau Gasol, and Robin Lopez have been the tops in GP for Eric’s team. Jubas play a slow paced, defense first, game, and they can only hope that the recent return of Myles Turner can push them toward a fight for a Silverhawks title.

Fob Stars (6-8-1)
It looks like Fob Stars is treading water, headed toward a 0.500 record yet again, and without much hope for a post-season berth. A recent loss to one-win Spade has to be bad for team morale, but perhaps the newly traded Tobias Harris can pump his career best numbers even higher in Clipperland. And there are other bright spots on this team. Namely the semi-emergence of Jamal Murray, who has been playing great recently, and the drafting of rookie John Collins, who projects to be a double double machine soon.

Collins and DeAndre Jordan form a nice bouncy duo up front, and Kemba Walker is still one of the most underrated fantasy assets around. And Walker is only twenty-seven, which is still quite young. The inexplicable collapse of Ricky Rubio’s AST numbers hurts Fob Stars though, and it looks like this middling team will continue to rebuild and tread water. Toilet Bowl anyone?

IL Conceived (4-10-1)
It’s already been quite a year for our rookie owner, Frank. It took only one month to match former Jedi Knight’s record of one-win (in two previous seasons, Jedi went 1-36-1 overall), and IL Conceived actually hit 0.500 — including knocking off Sour Snails in WK6 — and looked poised to grab a post-season berth. Then the injuries hit, Aaron Gordon cooled off from supernova status, and IL Conceived pivoted back to a youth focused future.

A mid-season trade of Jrue Holiday and Jeff Teague for Harrison Barnes and Jaylen Brown is a long term strategy, and with a 0-5-1 record recently, Frank’s team is headed straight for the Toilet Bowl. Oh, but this team is highlight friendly! Rookie point guards Dennis Smith Jr. and Donovan Mitchell are high fliers, Gordon and Brown are both rim rockers, and then there’s fellow rookie Jordan Bell, who also dunks like a maniac. Many owners are regretting not nabbing Mitchell in RD1, letting him slip to RD2, and now he’s headed toward a ROY fight with Ben Simmons.

With five of the six dispersal draft picks looking good — sorry Justise Winslow — the foundation has been set for IL Conceived to compete quickly, and with an astonishingly exciting backcourt to boot!

Mid-Season 2018: Voltron

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It’s the same old same old for Voltron division this year, with the exact #1-4 from last season intact. [Pre-season 2018]

Red Dagger (8-3-1)
It’s no surprise to see Thien atop the the standings here, as Red Dagger is once again a leading contender for a Russell Conference title. Having gone all-in before the season with the trade for Carmelo Anthony, this year is ring-or-bust for Thien. Unfortunately, OKC Melo hasn’t been quite as advertised, even though he’s still putting up pretty (inefficient) good numbers. The backslide story continues with John Wall, who has been both injured and lessened somewhat. No matter because Gary Harris has delivered in spades so far this season with 16.7 PTS, 2.2 3PT, 1.9 STL, on 49.0 FG%. He’s picked up the slack for Melo and Wall, and let’s not forget this team still features DeMarcus Cousins and Damian Lillard.

It’s unfortunate Patrick Beverly got hurt though, as he was having a find season as well. But hey, when you’re good, you're good, as Thien added rookie sharpshooter Lauri Markkanen, nice backups in Justin Holiday and Jeremy Lamb, and continues to build depth through constant digging on the free agent wire. This Dagger is headed straight for another playoffs!

So Buckets (7-4-1)
With seven wins already, Josh’s team is likely headed to a playoff spot too, even if digging into their record reveals a team that’s been mostly beating up on the weaker teams. Still, this is a squad ranked second in PTS, which is impressive isn’t it? There’s four prime time scorers on this team: DeMar DeRozan, Kyrie Irving, Joel Embiid, and CJ McCollum. All four are fantasy studs, and now DeRozan has added a three point shot too. Add in sophomore Dario Saric being able to carve out a role in Philly still — 17.6 PTS, 7.3 REB, 3.7 AST, 2.4 3PT, 1.1 STL — and it’s been kind of okay that Rudy Gobert has only suited up for half the available games. With such a strong core — don’t forget Jabari Parker waiting on IR — So Buckets could be poised to take on the big boys in the second half of the season. Remember, this was the team that upset Russell juggernaut Chunky Monkeys in RD1 of the playoffs last year!

Team Cameltoe (3-9)
We’re not sure what happened here. We thought Cameltoe was headed toward major success after a fantastic dispersal draft that gave rookie owner Felipe a competitive roster from the start. Instead, a late season slide last year has more or less continued this season as they are currently on a six game losing streak. How does a team with Anthony Davis and Hassan Whiteside rank last in REB?! (This team also ranked last in REB, AST, moves, and second-to-last in STL.) Sure, both injury prone big men have missed some games but that’s part of their charm.

Buddy Hield has been okay as a deep threat, Elfrid Payton still does his Rondo-lite impression, and Darren Collison still has a starting job, so things shouldn’t be this bad. JJ Redick has been excellent in Philadelphia too. Of course, maybe this is part of Felipe’s plan, as he waits on rookies Josh Jackson, Malik Monk, and IR stashed Harry Giles to grow up? Still, a stellar 2017-18 NBA rookie class and Cameltoe hasn’t had any of his three hit yet... Patience, patience!

Snack Bears (2-10)
Speaking of rookies that haven’t quite popped, De’Aaron Fox, drafted fourth this past year in SlamNation, has been outplayed by quite a few rookies already. It was expected that Fox may not shoot well from the get-go, but his Super Saiyan speed and copious amounts of available playing time in Sacramento was supposed to give him more than 10.1 PTS and 4.0 AST per game right? Same thing with rookie Jonathan Isaac, who was pitched as a versatile swingman, but hasn’t flashed much of anything. So yeah, Snack Bears is headed to another Toilet Bowl, and possibly the worst record in the league.

The thing is, we like this team! Kristaps Porzingis has evolved another level, Andre Drummond can hit free throws now (a clear trade win for Snack post-mega deal), Dwight Howard is averaging a shocking 15.7 PTS, 12.1 REB, 1.2 BLK on 53.5 FG%, Marcus Smart and Rajon Rondo fit this "no PTS by design" team, and Will Barton has been very useful alongside Evan Fournier. Go up and down this roster and it should all spell out more than two wins. We haven’t even mentioned Spencer Dinwiddie, who has been on a tear in Brooklyn recently. We know this is a weird team, set to tank certain categories, but it would seem like there’s enough talent here to gather up for a proper Toilet Bowl run. Let’s hope Brandon can get it together and earn a top pick in next year’s draft!

Mid-Season 2018: Transformers

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A division that gave us no winning teams last year is back on the rise! [Pre-season 2018]

Another Bad Creation (9-3)
After falling into a division title despite a losing record, ABC is here to prove that last year was no fluke. Jostling for a three-peat division title, Oliver’s team is positioned as the best team in Chamberlain Conference so far, which is quite an accomplishment. A full year of Russell Westbrook has helped the team, as well as the re-emergence of LaMarcus Aldridge. But the one key factor that can’t be overlooked is the incredible play of Tyreke Evans, who has been averaging 19.7 PTS, 5.1 REB, 4.7 AST, 2.2 3PT, and 1.1 STL per game, with good percentages too. That’s some superstar level production at a cheap price from the draft. Add in the PTS/REB from Enes Kanter, TJ Warren’s scoring prolificacy, and this team isn’t all that worried about Dirk Nowitzki and Dwayne Wade fading out. Currently on an eight game winning streak, Another Bad Creation looks to be headed for another (hopefully deep) playoff run!

Sager’s Suits and Ties (8-4)
What a surprise! Coming off a rookie year in which Matt only won four games, we assumed 2018 would be a rebuilding year. How wrong we were! SST came to play this season and despite injuries to preseason starting point guard Jeremy Lin, they’ve compiled a stellar record — with all four losses coming 4-5 also — and are for their first division title. What’s going on exactly? One word: Oladipo! Victor Oladipo was the fourth pick in 2017's dispersal draft but he’s elevated himself to (fantasy) superstar levels with 24.5 PTS, 5.2 REB, 4.1 AST, 2.7 3PT, 1.9 STL, 1.0 BLK, and 49.2 FG%. I had to write that all out because how many shooting guards have such incredible numbers? Alongside that, Lou Williams is contributing his usual points and threes, plus the continued good health of Bradley Beal has given SST a killer shooting guard lineup. Sure, Blake Griffin has been dinged up and Draymond Green has taken a dip with his scoring (again), but with so much firepower from the guards, Matt is headed toward a dramatic turnaround.

Squirtle Squad (6-6)
A 4-1 start had us thinking Squirtles was going to ride Giannis Antetokounmpo back to respectability after an eight-win season last year but like the real life Bucks, The Greek Freak may be lacking in some teammate help. It’s been three straight losses for Brian’s squad, albeit against top competition, and it’ll be a battle to get into the playoffs. The recent injury to Nikola Vucevic — who added a lovely 1.4 3PT this season — isn’t going to help. In addition, sophomore keepers Marquese Chriss and Thon Maker have both taken steps back and any promise they showed might be gone soon. The great news is that this year’s prize rookie, Lonzo Ball, the return on making the Toilet Bowl finals, has been much better the last month, averaging 13.9 PTS, 7.7 REB, 7.2 REB, 2.8 3PT, 1.8 STL, and 0.9 BLK, albeit still on horrific shooting. With Ball getting better, Giannis being Giannis, and the soon to be returned Zach LaVine, Squirtles will settle in for a wild card battle for the playoffs, or maybe they’ll sink back into the Toilet Bowl and try to get another high pick?

LA Buffy (2-9-1)
After three seasons of dipping in and around 0.500, the wheels have fallen off the Buffy wagon after starting off 1-6. We knew it would be a rough ride with Isaiah Thomas out, but Danilo Gallinari, George Hill, and Austin Rivers have all missed time too. At least Khris Middleton has been healthy and doing fantastic with a well-balanced and robust stat line as a sneaky great swingman! And Domantas Sabonis has surprised after being freed from OKC, dumping in nice rebounds, points, and field goal percentage.Plus, sophomore Brandon Ingram is looking very solid with 16.1 PTS, 5.4 REB, 3.3 REB, and 0.8 STL/BLK a game. There’s a decent mix of young and old here but health is the major factor. If IT4 has a big second half, and this team gets a bit more healthy, Buffy will have a puncher’s chance in the Toilet Bowl, which would be his fifth straight appearance…

Chamberlain 2018: Silverhawks

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IL Conceived (0-18-1)
The good news is that it shouldn’t be difficult to improve on Jedi Knight’s two year record of 0-18-1 and 1-18 in 2016/7. I mean, one win will tie and two wins will already put new owner Frank on better footing than the previous regime. With a 24-115-5 record in eight seasons, no playoff experience, and a history of in-season mismanagement, IL Conceived will need an entire culture overhaul. It’s a good thing Frank's enthusiastic! The bad news is that getting even two wins might be difficult here. I mean, the best player on the six man core might be Tim Hardaway Jr, who signed a huge off-season contract and should now get all the shots he wants in New York. Youngish vets Jeff Teague and Jrue Holiday are around to steady the backcourt, and there’s immense promise with Aaron Gordon and Willie Cauley-Stein in the frontcourt but they might also just be perpetually on the verge. Justise Winslow was picked up for his defensive upside, but he still can’t shoot. And that’s that on the keeper situation.

However, Dennis Smith Jr. is here! With the third overall pick, Frank grabbed Smith, who was rumored to be considered for the #1 and #2 overall picks. In the end, IL Conceived could have grabbed the kind of superstar that could jumpstart a franchise. Already this prognosticator is all-in on Smith and we think he’ll be better than Markelle Fultz… There’s also another interesting rookie, summer league star Donovan Mitchell, who could now have extra time with Dante Exum out (again). At backup big, there will be a battle for some playing time between Skal Labissiere and Bobby Portis, with Kelly Olynyk and Tyler Johnson likely starters to bring additional outside shooting onto the floor. Overall this could be an exciting team full of growth, but we’re not sure two wins is around the corner. Frank the Tank?!

Fob Stars (9-10)
With another solid nine win season under their belts, Fob Stars have proven that they aren’t in the league’s bottom dwellers anymore — that’s four out of five seasons hovering right around 0.500. With back-to-back playoff appearances to boot, Jimmy’s team is entering its most successful stretch. A couple of trades last year brought in new keepers Ricky Rubio, DeAndre Jordan, and Tobias Harris, all of which can be considered wins. While Jamal Murray flashed some upside last year, he’ll still need to advance quite a bit this season. Kemba Walker is here to lead this team, and he and stretch four Ryan Anderson combine for 5.0 3PT a game.

Poised on the brink of continued success, GM Jimmy also has gone young with his draft. We love Rodney Hood’s scoring opportunities this year, and rookie John Collins has all the opportunity in Atlanta to take over the power forward minutes. And there’s UCLA rookie TJ Leaf in Indiana to do the same (no idea who he was but since Jimmy is a Bruin I guess he must know?). Seth Curry and Yogi Ferrell will likely cannibalize each other’s minutes in a crowded Mavericks backcourt but that’s okay for now. And if Rondae Hollis-Jefferson can find a shot he can really be useful for his REB-AST help. Overall Fob Stars are looking very competitive, with a bunch of outside shooting surrounding DeAndre, and now with a point guard who will really sling the passes around to all deep threats. The old plodding frontcourt of Zach Randolph and Marcin Gortat are finally gone, and now it’s a race to outscore opponents!

Fat Jubas (13-5-1)
It’s a shame Jubas has been stuck in a division with Sour Snails because otherwise they would be the class of the division. Still, with one title, seven postseason appearances, a semi-Toilet Bowl win, and the third highest overall winning percentage (62.6%), Jubas are always a contender. I mean, sort of. Despite three straight upset wins in the first round of the playoffs, Jubas just can’t get over the Sour Snails hump — they’ve been knocked out by them the past three years. Then again, who can defeat the Snails!?!

The returning core of Chris Paul, Gordon Hayward, Nicolas Batum, Jonas Valanciunas, Harrison Barnes, and new keeper Myles Turner should be strong as usual. Paul and Hayward are in new NBA situations but their numbers should at least stay even. Barnes emerged as a real scoring asset last year and Turner is poised for a super breakout year. It’s a shame Batum already hurt but the Frenchman tends to get dinged up anyway. Jae Crowder will need to step in to replace him for awhile as the glue guy. We’re big fans of Milos Teodosic’s incredible passing and we hope he’ll inherit all of Paul’s leftover assists when he ditched Los Angeles. Pau Gasol and Robin Lopez are both serviceable and predictable, and now eerily about the same player fantasy wise. There’s some upside in shooters Norman Powell and Bogdan Bogdanovic so if one of them can break out, Jubas will split the difference between contending and growing depth wonderfully. It’s gonna be hard to do better than last year’s thirteen wins but if anyone has a clear shot at upsetting Snails in the Chamberlain Conference, it’ll have to be CP3 and Milos!

Sour Snails (17-1-1)
There’s not much to say here about a three-peat winner. Just look over last season’s post-Finals article for all the details of how Snails got here. However, we all know that egos get in the way after three straight titles so this is definitely the year Snails go down! Cleared of controversy that Trieu was secretly running two teams, the Snails are looking vulnerable for the first time in awhile. I mean, if vulnerable includes acquiring Kevin Durant mid-season to pair with Steph Curry… While Russell Westbrook’s triple doubles were missed, Durant’s all around efficiency fits this team even better. So where’s the hope here? Well, semi-new acquisitions Mike Conley, Brook Lopez, and Nerlens Noel are all pretty injury prone so if they can all get hurt, along with one of KD or Steph, we could have a Snails showing in the Toilet Bowl! Oh and if Thibodeau runs Jimmy Butler into the ground, that would be nice too.

Four-peats DON’T happen! With only four losses total in the past four seasons, could we be staring at a season in which Trieu suffers four defeats in one year? I say “yes!” Then again, if everyone goes down, “Kobe 2.0” Kyle Kuzma could become the star of the show and probably still lead Trieu to a (summer league) title. Snails’ draft was pretty utilitarian with Markieff Morris, Wilson Chandler, and Josh Richardson for big wings, and tank big men Jahlil Okafor and Bismack Biyombo around in case Lopez and Noel go down.

Seriously, this is the year Snails goes down…. Please?....

Russell 2018: Thundercats

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Funk Coalition (7-12)
If you’re not gonna win the Toilet Bowl, you might as well try to not be in it at all right? After back-to-back loser wins to secure Karl-Anthony Towns and Ben “Next Magic” Simmons, Funk Coalition has completed overturned his keeper core, keeping only KAT as his franchise cornerstone. Gone are Andre Drummond, DeAndre Jordan, Ricky Rubio, Rajon Rondo, and Tobias Harris. After a flurry of pre and in-season trades last year, the new look Funk is KAT, Simmons, Klay Thompson, D’Angelo Russell, Kentavious Caldwell-Pope, and Derrick Favors. Also gone is big ball and with it a new analytics focused approach that completely removes decision making from GM Jon’s very subjective opinions.

With a young skewing roster, the perpetually rebuilding Funk drafted Celtics rookie Jayson Tatum at 2018 1.7, and will wait on his progress. With a hole at small forward until Tatum evolves into Paul Pierce 2.0, Funk drafted Thaddeus Young, Terrence Ross, and CJ Miles to fill up the wings. Nikola Mirotic will be on-board to spread the floor around KAT but the only other front court support here is Favors and FA pickup Cody Zeller. Time will tell if this more balanced version of Funk can succeed but with only one playoff berth in their history, and no division wins, a successful season for Jon would be even sniffing a post-season appearance. Good luck in this stacked division though...

Swamp Dragons (10-9)
After narrowly missing out on the playoffs, Swamp Dragons took their winning but no playoff appearance record and then proceeded to roll their way to the 2018 top pick. After having multiple discussions about trading down, GM Eddie decided to stay put and take the consensus #1, Markelle Fultz. Can Fultz make an impact on a crowded Sixers roster? We’ll find out! Swamp Dragons can afford to roll the dice on Fultz and his new free throw shooting mechanic because Dragon's post-LeBron James rebuild team has returned to competitiveness awfully fast. GM Eddie has done incredible work hitting on young talent via all avenues. Nikola Jokic via free agency, Jusuf Nurkic via draft, and Dennis Schroder via trade. And while the LeBron and Kyle Lowry for Andrew Wiggins and Jabari Parker trade seems to have been a bit of a loss — Parker was cut this off-season — Dragons can boast a wonderful talent base.

And in the potential of Fultz, the playing time ahead of sophomore Taurean Prince in RD3, plus Dewayne Dedmon, Jaylen Brown, and Allen Crabbe in the latter rounds of the draft and it’s clear that Eddie isn’t done fueling up even as the Swampies remain very competitive. And we haven’t even mentioned franchise player Paul George, who is headed to Oklahoma City to play second fiddle, but will likely remain a top tier fantasy force. Throw in the outside pop of Robert Covington (sixth keeper) and Eric Gordon (second 2018 RD1 pick resulting from LBJ trade) and Swamp is young, old, talented, deep, and a beautiful blend of just about everything. Let’s see if they’ll hit a Finals before even their most optimistic projections from a few years ago.

Team Spade (12-7)
With the most playoff appearances in SlamNation history (8), and never having missed the playoffs even once, the Spade franchise has a case for second most successful team in history. Since Randall took over in the 2014 season, he’s gone 51-25, and never had were than twelve wins in a season. A tremendously stable keeper core has helped as Spade has only changed one keeper during Randall’s time at the helm: Kobe Bryant in 2017 for Devin Booker. Just one keeper change in four years! The non-Booker five of Kawhi Leonard, Paul Millsap, Kevin Love, Al Horford, and Eric Bledsoe have just stuck around, and between them, they’ve provided Spade with awesome firepower in every category. Aha, but what about playoff success you say!? Well, Spade has only reached one Finals during this time, in 2016, and while they are perennial contenders, they do have quite the injury prone reputation — Kawhi, Love, and Booker are already DTD to start the season.

The strategy in drafts has always been for Randall to supplement his balanced top six. This year welcomes Reggie Jackson, Dion Waiters, and Patty Mills to the backcourt. Zach Randolph will get bruise his way to his usual numbers, and there’s hope that sophomore Willy Hernangomez can get a starting gig alongside best friend Kristaps Porzingis. Spade also took a flier on 7’3” Boban Marjanovic, who may not get much time in Detroit but will be a fan favorite at least. Maybe Boban can be the lucky charm that can get Spade a return to the playoffs and a much coveted ring.

Chunky Monkeys (18-1)
Of course, for anyone to get to a Finals, they’ll have to get through Chunky Monkeys first. Well, actually no. That’s not the case, because despite going all-in on LeBron James at the beginning of the 2016 season, Evan’s team hasn’t reach the Finals yet in two tries. Last year’s first round upset came on the heels of Kyle Lowry’s injury and while Chunky is loaded with a LeBron, James Harden, and Lowry trio, more tinkering could be needed to find the perfect complementary pieces to The King and The Beard. Last year’s version of Monkeys featured a lot of 3PT, including a combined 3.0 from centers Marc Gasol and Serge Ibaka. Now Ibaka is gone and Monkeys will play more traditionally with Gasol as the lone space clearer at center, as non-3PT shooting Clint Capela is Ibaka’s keeper replacement. Along with that, Otto Porter Jr. came on strong as a younger and better version of Jae Crowder, and he replaced the ex-Celtic in the keeper core.

Unfortunately, Monkey’s draft was slightly confusing. A team with a heavy veteran bent went young with Jamychal Green, Kris Dunn, Caris Levert, Mo Harkless, and Jerian Grant for their draft — Monkeys didn’t have a RD1 but did have two RD2 plus various other trades. The only championship ready contributor here is likely Patrick Beverly, who has a new starting gig in Clipperland. If the real LBJ was GM-ing this team, he’d be demanding some seasoned vets already, as who knows how long his championship window can stay open (with the new look Celtics obviously winning the title in 2019…). Of course, Evan went a league leading 18-1 last year, even beating out 17-1-1 Sour Snails, so it’s hard to say that he doesn’t know what he’s doing. Will we finally see a Monkeys versus Snails in a Mt. Carmel title bout?!

Chamberlain 2018: Transformers

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Sager’s Suits and Ties (4-15)
It was a tough season for SST last season, their first year in in SlamNation. After getting their first win relatively early, in WK3, Matt’s team went on a six game losing streak and any hopes of a 0.500 rookie year was dashed. Unfortunately, it was the worst regular season in the franchise’s history — dating back to Eron, Joven, and Chandler days (C Lucas has mysteriously re-joined our GroupMe!) — so there’s nowhere else to go but up! The good news is that Sager’s Suit and Ties are in prime position to have a great sophomore year. Blake Griffin is on a bounceback year and we love that he’ll now have more assists with micro-manager/aggressor Chris Paul gone. Draymond Green is still the most versatile fantasy player alive despite an off shooting year, and then there’s Bradley Beal, who had a fantastic true breakout season befitting his contract. Enes Kanter is now gone as a keeper, replaced by his former Thunder teammate Steven Adams, and Lou Williams was kept to bring some extra shooting to the core.

With the #4 overall pick in 2018 Matt elected to not invest in a rookie but instead took Jeremy Lin, who has set off social media with his new (appropriated) hairstyle, and will also likely have a pretty good season now that he’s fully healthy. Some prognosticators are saying that Lin will outproduce many of this year’s touted rookies, and he’ll definitely be given full rein to run point for SST -- something they were missing last year. We like the re-upside of RD3 pick Kent Bazemore on an empty Atlanta team and by adding Gorgui Dieng and Al-Farouq Aminu, GM Matt is hoping to build some useful depth. While JR Smith sulks about his non-starting role in Cleveland, he will be handy as another shooting threat. And while we’re not sure how Mason Plumlee will do in a crowded Denver front court, he’s a useful last round gamble. Overall, SST is still looking to find an identity and if they can hit 0.500 or somewhere close to it this season, their supportive fanbase would be happy with the upward trajectory. Also, RIP Craig Sager.

LA Buffy (7-11-1)
It’s official, Buffy is stuck on mediocrity hill. That may not even quite describe how Buffy has slipped to a three year record of 24-30-3 (after a 5-14 campaign in 2014) after their glory days of two division titles (2011, 2013). Playing in the traditional tough Transformers division hasn’t helped, but Roger is now officially the least playoff decorated team in the division — everyone else has at least four post-season appearances. Part of the problem for Buffy has been health issues. Last year Khris Middleton, Danilo Gallinari, and George Hill all missed major time. And now franchise cornerstone Isaiah “Back up the Brinks truck” Thomas will be out until at least February, which effectively takes him out of the 2018 SlamNation regular season. So the hope here is that 2017’s #2 overall pick, Brandon Ingram develops quickly! Roger did swing a pre-draft trade to pick up Serge Ibaka to bolster the frontline and that’ll help a lot as he replaces Tristan Thompson and Robin Lopez as keepers.

Traditionally, Roger’s drafts have skewed veteran heavy and he’s done it again (mostly). This time around though, Roger's gone for youngish veterans, the likes of Avery Bradley, Greg Monroe, Jordan Clarkson, Austin Rivers, and Mike Muscala. Buffy’s only drafted old guy was Ersan Ilysaova, who is thirty. Is Buffy suck a little in-between competitiveness and a youth movement? After four straight Toilet Bowl appearances, it may behoove Buffy to go into the loser bowl once again to grab a high pick in a loaded 2019 draft. We’d like to see this once proud franchise rise again but it may need to count on some more consistent health to avoid the mediocrity treadmill.

Squirtle Squad (8-11)
After four appearances in the Toilet Bowl (2010, 2011, 2016, 2017), Squirtle Squad finally made a TB Finals, and emerged with a high pick at the perfect time. While #2 Lonzo Ball may have more impact on the court with his unselfish play, there’s no doubting that fantasy Ball will at least bang in 3PT and distribute a ton of AST. Paired with Giannis Antetokounmpo’s all-around game, Squirtles could find themselves back in the playoffs after a two year absence — following four straight appearances from 2011-2015. While Zach LaVine’s injury recovery will take awhile, his new situation Chicago is a great one, and last year’s FA pickup of Thon Maker could pay off soon as Maker had a intriguing NBA playoffs run. Marquese Chriss has similar upside and this young Squad could be fully grown soon. For now, Goran Dragic — a result of a Serge Ibaka trade two years ago — and Nikola Vucevic are here to add a steady hand at PG and C until the kids are ready.

With a solid keeper core in place, GM Brian did grab some veterans to round out a potential postseason push. Trevor Ariza is always deceptively great and um, maybe Lance Stephenson and Chandler Parsons could maybe return to some glory? Squirtles is gambling that Timofey Mozgov will be there to grab all the REB for Brooklyn — oh wait, he’s already been cut for Alex Len -- and there were shots taken on sophomores Dejounte Murray and Tyler Ullis (via FA). Squirtles are definitely on a youth movement but their power curve could prove pretty short if Ball can work his magic in fantasy as well as on the floor.

Another Bad Creation (9-10)
Oh the indignity of not only a losing record playoff season but also a division title! Do we have rules against division titles handed out for sub-0.500 teams? No? Well, then ABC can say that last season was a success as they picked up their second Transformers banner (first back-to-back for the division) and Transformers' leading sixth playoff appearance. And oh yeah, not to bury the lead here but Oliver traded Kevin Durant. Yes, the player Oliver swore to never move got moved last season… For former teammate and triple double MVP Russell Westbrook!!! This league shattering deal immediately made Another Bad Creation a team of intrigue and despite getting upset in the first round by Fat Jubas, we’re excited that ABC finally has a point guard for their roster. And what a point guard! While Westbrook isn’t likely to average a triple double again, his numbers will still be incredible.

A very veteran heavy team, ABC is clearly gunning for playoff success behind Westbrook, LaMarcus Aldridge, Dwayne Wade, Wesley Matthews, Dirk Nowitzki, and Marcus “Boston Strangler” Morris. That’s an old team, possibly the oldest in SlamNation and even Malcolm Brogdon, last year's ROY and ABC's 2018 RD1 pick, is a bit old at twenty-four. The rest of the draft brought in Enes Kanter, Tyreke Evans, and Michael Kidd-Gilchrist while post-draft FA pickups added Evan Turner and Trevor Booker. The only other youngish player outside of Brogdon on this team is third year TJ Warren, who flashed signs of being a very effective situational scorer. Overall, Oliver is confident that with a new franchise cornerstone, and all this veteran savvy, he can get over the Fat Jubas playoff hump — ABC has been eliminated by Jubas in the first round three times — and then continue on to even greater things.

Russell 2018: Voltron

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 Snack Bears (4-15)
After starting off winless in their first ten matchups, Snacks managed to go 4-5 the rest of the way. One of those wins was a huge WK16 victory against eventual Russell champ Chunky Monkeys and was Brandon’s highlight of the season. What’s next for this team? Well, a huge lineup is what! After a mid-season mega-deal that sent Kentavious Caldwell-Pope and Derrick Favors packing, Snack Bears now have the look of a punt PTS and FT% team. Recall that during Brandon’s rookie season, he went 10-9 for a surprising playoff berth and could be poised to do the same again behind an even jumbo-ier roster. Andre Drummond joins Kristaps Porzingis and Dwight Howard on the front line to create the most intimidating defensive wall in the league. Will Rajon Rondo and Marcus Smart do weird things and tank percentages? Probably! But they’ll rack up AST, REB, and STL along the way.

Plus, 2018 #4 pick De’Aaron Fox projects to be exactly like a Rondo/Smart lovechild with blazing speed, no shot, and stifling defense. And there’s a chance that fellow rookie Jonathan Isaac could get some major minutes in Orlando behind his defensive skills too. Should some shooting be required, sixth keeper Evan Fournier and third rounder Will Barton, plus late rounders Bojan Bogdanovic (the one on the Nets) and the corpse of DeMarre Carroll could be slotted in to provide some spacing. But if additional heads need to be banged, Tristan Thompson is available off the bench. Frankly, we’re excited to see this big ball team take the floor this season as they could surprise many SlamNation teams that are swinging very small and shooter heavy. Long live big ball!

Team Cameltoe (7-12)
Rookie owner Felipe came out a very respectable 6-7 before sliding into a five game losing streak that took them out of playoff contention. Still, there’s no denying that Cameltoe had a successful first year in Slam as they not only started competitively but also gathered talent and assets along the way. GM Felipe is not afraid to make moves, that’s for sure! Already, three of the six keepers Felipe chose are gone: Brook Lopez, Mike Conley, and now Carmelo Anthony in a pre-draft deal with Thien. See ya later vets!

With Anthony Davis and Hassan Whiteside manning the pivot, Cameltoe is getting a close approximation of the New Orleans Pelicans experience. Add in another bruiser in Marcin Gortat and this three-man unit officially gives Voltron another fearsome big man lineup. Actually, this team is slightly similar to Snack Bears as there’s also a mix of non-shooters at point guard with Elfrid Payton and surprise keeper Derrick Rose as the starting duo. Rookie Josh Jackson projects as a non-shooter too, but his all-around game will be valuable. Of course, Felipe won’t keep The Brow all boxed up without some spacing so Cameltoe also have Buddy Hield, JJ Redick, and rookie Malik Monk ready to bombs away. Marvin Williams has resurrected his career as a stretch four and he could come off the bench to great effect if necessary. Darren Collison and Michael Beasley are low end plug-ins but could be useful in pinches. We really like the draft and stash of Harry Giles because Cameltoe acquired so many extra RD3 picks this year that Felipe wanted to forfeit his later round pick! How bold! Here’s looking to another season from Cameltoe as we see Felipe’s vision take shape.

So Buckets (11-8)
An eight-loss team knocked off a one-loss team in last year’s playoffs, as Josh’s So Buckets handily dispatched Russell Conference juggernaut Chunky Monkeys in RD1. Unfortunately, Buckets was denied a Finals showing by Young Gunn’s but buoyed by last year’s playoff victory — a first for the franchise — Kyrie and Co. are looking to continue their torrid 4-1 finish to 2017. The big news is that Irving is now in Boston, and it’s likely his numbers will increase across the board. Rudy Gobert is a defensive anchor in the middle, and yeah, Joel Embiid could play more games this season. JOEL EMBIID! He puts up the same numbers as a normal player in half the minutes so if he can just be healthy for the fantasy playoffs, Buckets could take out anyone. Add in a nice rookie season by Dario Saric, the fantastic defense/offense switch from Myles Turner to CJ McCollum, plus DeMar DeRozan supposedly working on a three point shot, and this keeper core is insanely drool worthy.

Josh took the first round gamble on Jabari Parker too, for a stash, and that could add to this team’s continued success. We really like the all-around game of James Johnson, and it’s shocking that he’s thirty years old right? Rudy Gay could be a semi-steal on the wing and even if Emmanuel Mudiay never gets better, there’s a nice warm spot on the bench for him. Frank Kaminsky has some stretch potential and while we initially confused Jonathan Simmons with Jonathan Isaac, we now know the difference between the two Orlando players -- Simmons is the ex-Spur who specializes in huge chase down blocks. Overall this team is destined to do better than eleven wins, and we’re possibly looking at another division title for Buckets, which would be Josh’s third after a three year hiatus.

Young Gunn’s (14-5)
After four straight playoff appearances, two division titles, one Finals appearance, what else is there left for Young Gunn’s to do? It's ring or bust every year for them. We say this year after year, but it’s true: Thien has never had a losing season, ever! And while conspiracy theorists suspected that Thien’s media silence was perhaps not all above board, well, the truth is that Thien is just an assassin: quiet and deadly. Young Gunn's return with the powerful trio of John Wall, Damian Lillard, and DeMarcus Cousins. Julius Randle will be given more time to express his talent, and Young Gunn’s is going even more all in by trading pre-draft for Carmelo Anthony, which will bolster this team’s championship hopes. Oh yeah, sixth keeper Gary Harris is looking like a possible breakout candidate too, and clearly an upgrade over last year’s last keeper, Jordan Clarkson.

But Thien isn’t quite pushing all their chips to the center of the table as they went for youth in RD1&2 of this year’s draft, taking two rookies: Knicks point guard Frank Ntilikina and Bulls shooter Lauri “Dirk 0.5” Markkanen. Their third round picks as forfeited in the Melo trade, and they went rookie again with Caleb Swanigan in RD4. Add in Jeremy Lamb, Ish Smith, and Justin Holiday (a late breaking RD6 trade with Cameltoe, again) and this draft looks at odds with Thien’s title push. Then again, Wall, Lillard, and Cousins are all young so this could just be in line with building an even more sustainable franchise. Here’s hoping Young Gunn’s — a rare year where Thien hasn’t changed team names from one season to the next — can get the ring they’ve worked so hard towards.

Mid-Season 2017: Thundercats

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We’ve saved the best for last, as Thundercats boasts our lone undefeated team and feature three teams playing 0.500+ ball. There’s a chance we have three contenders coming out of here, and so far this season, Thundercats have proven to be the best division in SlamNation. [2017 Preview | 2016 Mid-Season]

Chunky Monkeys (11-0)
First, a thank you to Monkey for insuring that Snails doesn’t have another undefeated season, in a 8-1 pounding no less. We’re more than happy to welcome two juggernauts this year, mirroring the real life NBA. If we could somehow just get Durant to Snails and Kyrie to Monkeys, this would practically be the 2016-7 NBA Finals matchup right? Let’s look at where Monkeys stack up: they are third in REB and STL, second in PTS, FG%, BLKS, and first in 3PT and AST (both by wide margins). Impressive stuff. The uptick in AST is especially notable because James Harden is one-man wrecking machine and is throwing up 28.2 PTS, 11.8 AST, and 8.2 REB on the year. I won’t even mention his 3 3.0PT either. But it’s to see that Evan’s got a humming offense.

And now he’s got a frontline too, as Marc Gasol has been scoring well — albeit with 5.9 REB — and also tossing in 3PT, just like front court mate Serge Ibaka. It’s a shame Clint Capela went down for a few weeks, as he was breakout out with a near double-double and 1.6 BLK per. And then we add Otto Porter to the mix, to match alongside Jae Crowder as do-everything SF/PFs, and this juggernaut assembled is almost fated for a Finals appearance. And then if Harden, LeBron James, Kyle Lowry, and a deep collection of guys can’t take out Snails, is there anybody who can?!

Swamp Dragons (6-5)
After 6-13 and 4-14-1 records the past two seasons, we thought Swamp Dragons were still rebuilding. Instead, Eddie’s team is right back in the postseason hunt and while a little erratic, still have the goods to cause noise this season. It’s not easy to trade off LeBron James and Kyle Lowry and then bounce back just a year later. We were a little worried if Andrew Wiggins and Jabari Parker would return value for The King, but now both of them have added a three point shot, and Parker has really emerged to score almost as much as Wiggins. With two matchups against cousin Evan still looming ahead, Swamp will get to find out how close they are to being a contender again.

Along with that, Nikola Jokic has solidified his game after a horrific early season and has pushed Jusuf Nurkic aside to averages of 20.5 PTS, 9.3 REB, 5.7 AST, 1.0 STL and 61.3 FG% over his last two weeks. (Also: look at this Jokic pass, it's insane!) That’s the Jokic Eddie wanted to see, and he finally got him. Dennis Schroder has also, as expected, come up big in a starting role, and Eddie might have even nabbed another fine point guard prospect in rookie Malcolm Brogdon, who has come out of nowhere to average 7.0 AST. And with Reggie Jackson back, plus Robert Covington and DeMarre Carroll on the wings, all anchored by Paul George, it’s a nice mix. The Dragons aren’t quite back to full competition though, as they are pretty low in FG%, REB, and BLK. Even Super Jokic can’t do it alone on the front lines and all the other big guys on here are definitely small ball types.

Team Spade (6-5)
We power ranked Spade as the #2 franchise in SlamNation this summer, and they’ve had a long history of success. So it’s strange to see them struggling near 0.500 mark, after starting off 1-3. Already they’ve lost more games they did than all of last year, and they find themselves fighting with Swamp Dragons and So Buckets for a playoff spot. What gives? For one, Spade is ranked a disastrous last in FG%. Sure, they are first in FT%, but being unable to shoot has not been a hallmark of this team. Unfortunately, the fall guy may be sophomore Devin Booker, who is leading the team in shots attempted, but only dropping in 40.9% of his field goals. Also, old FG% stalwarts like Kawhi Leonard and Paul Millsap aren’t quite as otherworldly as before. Albeit, all those shots are getting Spade to fifth in PTS and second in 3PT. Plus they are a healthy fourth in AST and STL. So maybe there’s nothing to worry about.

Plus, look at all the good news Spade has: a healthy Eric Bledsoe, a return from family time off Jrue Holiday, a resurgent fantasy monster in Kevin Love, plus career highs in BLK/3PT from Al Horford. So what’s to worry about here? Well, that 6-5 record, that’s what. For a team with such talent and cohesiveness, six wins is a mystery, as Randall has suffered losses against not only the top tier teams in the league but also a few against lesser foes. For our back-to-back division champs, this could be the year they somehow backslide into the Toilet Bowl!

Funk Coalition (4-7)
After a lot of talk and bluster, Funk Coalition found themselves at the bottom of the barrel after a spanking by Sour Snails, and now face a total rebuild. The talk of the town is that every player is available, save Karl-Anthony Towns. Every. Single. Player. And for cheap! And even though they’ve picked up another two wins since being highlighted as one of the worst teams in the league, GM Jon knows the big ball experiment is over. Forget dominating the big man categories, as Funk is an atrocious twelfth in FG%, and can’t even get to first in REB. Meanwhile, their AST, STL, BLK, and TO are all average, which means they aren’t winning the categories they need to win. Sure, they could three-peat in the Toilet Bowl, but the Toilet Bowl is for losers!

The main problem this season has been the lack of AST coming from Ricky Rubio and Rajon Rondo. Rubio has been erratic and hurt, and scoring less than ever. And Rondo, Rondo isn’t even playing for the Bulls anymore. Draft day trades for Rondae Hollis-Jefferson, Evan Turner, and Nerlens Noel have come up empty — although Noel may be swinging into shape after injury. Things are so desperate for Funk that they just scooped up a player to hoard on IR that’s out of the entire season. Which means 2017 #1 overall pick Ben Simmons gets to the active roster, even though he has no timetable yet. Sigh.

Someone save this team, someone trade with Jon so he can get out of his misery. Otherwise he’ll be forced to stick with this stupid lineup and destroy the Toilet Bowl field once again, and be declared the Biggest Loser Ever. Save me!

Mid-Season 2017: Silverhawks

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We have three likely playoff teams in this division, and no undefeated teams for a change. It's basically an open race! Okay, not quite, but we do have Jubas and Fob Stars trending upwards while Sour Snails still sit atop the throne. Any guesses on when someone else might win this division? [2017 Preview | 2016 Mid-Season]

Sour Snails (10-1)
Ding dong the champ is dead, the champ is dead! Oh wait, no, they aren’t. After fending off a hard week from Funk Coalition — sorry for that bit of fiction, I just had to pretend — Snails are still basically undefeated, with their lone loss coming in a WK7 matchup versus Chunky Monkeys. With only one more tough game on the schedule, it’s likely Snails will go with just one loss (again). Tops in FG%, PTS, and REB. For a change, they are only third in 3PT and AST, and second in STL (and a paltry sixth in BLK and FT%), but that’s more than enough to make them a dominant team.

This version of Snails definitely skews bigger, with Hassan Whiteside, Gorgui Dieng, and JaMychal Green all getting decent GPs. And Trieu is always scouring the waiver wire too, having already used guys like Sean Kilpatrick and the new pickup of Montrell "Trieu's Troll" Harrell to their advantage. And those four guards are still unbeatable, with Russell Westbrook and Jimmy Butler picking up their games another notch, even as Steph Curry and Klay Thompson are having “down” years. Yikes! Add in the breakout year from Avery Bradley — averaging 18.0 PTS, 7.0 REB, 2.1 3PT, 1.3 STL, 47.9 FG% — and the Snails are not just reloaded, but perhaps better than ever. Makes it great that they lost at least once this season, right? See you in the playoffs Snails, where they’ll try to three-peat!

Fat Jubas (8-3)
Looks like Jubas are well on their way to another eleven win season, if not more! Eric’s team started off 4-0 and have only picked up losses against close to elite teams. A WK14 matchup with Chunky Monkeys loom — as well as an end of season WK19 versus Snails — so Jubas will get to gauge how close they are to actual championship contention as the second half of the season moves on. We know the story here: Can Jubas beat Sour Snails (they’ve gotten bounced by them in the past two years)? If not, they could find themselves facing another loss in the Chamberlain Conference Finals yet again...

As always, Chris Paul is a stud, and even though he’s been dinged up, he’s back now. Same with Gordon Hayward, who is working hard toward an All-Star berth. The huge trade off of CJ McCollum for young stud Myles Turner really added to the front line and the emergence of Harrison Barnes as a legit offensive threat has been a big boon to the team. And let’s not sleep on Nicolas Batum, who started off the season horribly but has rebounded nicely of late. And hell, the early-draft trade of Pau Gasol has even worked out pretty well, even if Gasol has taken a slight step back in the Spurs system. Overall, Jubas are like they always are: great percentages, excellent on the boards, and very steady everywhere else. This team is exactly like CP3’s Clippers, close but ultimately maybe not a cigar?

Fob Stars (6-5)
Having never finished with a 0.500 record, Jimmy’s Fobs are actually right there, with a chance to hit the postseason in back-to-back years. That’s not bad! Sure, most of their wins have come agains inferior teams, but a WK9 victory over Dragon Warriors suggest this team has fighter potential. With an offensive boost from the draft, these Fob Stars have transitioned very nicely from their past history of a big man dominated roster. First off, the trade for Tobias Harris has paid handsome dividends, as Harris has continued being a steady wing with excellent percentages. Much better than having Nerlens Noel on Fob’s bench eh?

With Harris and Ryan Anderson, Fobs can play some excellent small ball around the no-joke Kemba Walker, and that includes the deep shooting of Trevor Ariza, and lately James Johnson. And heck, even rookie Jamal Murray has shown flashes of a possible last season surge. It’s unfortunate that Jimmy dropped Will Barton too early, and that Allen Crabbe (and to a lesser extend, Kent Bazemore) didn’t work out, but still, these Stars are looking good and have the inside track for a playoff showing. They have the oldest big man duo in the league, behind Marcin Gortat and Tyson Chandler, but that’s fine as both are rebounding the shit out of the ball. The big question going down the stretch is if D’Angelo Russell can pick it up, and help this team that is horrible in AST.

Jedi Knights (0-11)
At one point mid-week, Jedi was leading in the matchup against fellow winless 0-10 team Snack Bears, but at the end of the day, they still lost, coming up short in 3PT and STL. We’ve already covered the Jedis' futility this season, so we’re not gonna harp on those points. We’re gonna instead look for solutions here, so that Knights can maybe get a win this year, or at least have a plan for the future. Okay, here we go!

First, put together an advisory board for all trades. After the Otto Porter for Joakim Noah fiasco, that’s a must. Haha. Okay, just kidding. Maybe not. Anyway, while Jedis are bereft of talent, they are not totally without assets. For one, Thaddeus Young and his high steals and well-rounded line has to be useful to somebody. Same could be said for Jeff Teague, who is averaging 15.6 PTS, 7.9 AST, and 1.7 STL. Could they be packaged together to a near contender for some younger player? It’s possible Markieff Morris and Brandon Knight have some limited value too. Moving either for younger players could be good. Sense a theme here? Just go younger younger younger, and more upside! Cut Noah, cut Andrew Bogut, cut Luol Deng, maybe cut Monta Ellis.

Jedi won’t be competitive any time soon but they can at least try to be competitive in upcoming Toilet Bowls. And in a few years, if Kris Dunn and Emmanuel Mudiay, and whoever else can get better, there might be some hope here. Instead of getting veterans, GM Chris needs to work that waiver wire and snatch up guys to remain competitive in the short term, but also take swings on some young guys who aren’t getting major minutes now, but are clearly headed for big things. For example: Thon Maker. Again, joke but no joke.

Basically our suggestion is to just work that waiver wire, hard! With only four moves total, Jedi ranks second-to-last in that category, and that won’t cut it. They should be streaming the last two spots on their roster, just fishing for guys. And then just use the rest of the bench to hold players. Guys like Trey Lyles, who was on this team right as the season started, but then got cut. Same with rookie Caris LeVert, who was on the roster but is now gone -- and now on the upswing. These are guys Jedi just needs to sit on and hope they grow, or gain some trade value eventually. The Jedis need to be prospectors, and dig dig dig!

Mid-Season 2017: Voltron

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Our second divisional look focuses on Russell Conference’s Voltron. We got three young and exciting teams here, plus one winless squad going for an epic first win. It's exciting times ahead! [2017 Preview | 2016 Mid-Season]

Dragon Warriors (8-2)
Our defending Voltron champs are once again well on their way to another back-to-back division title (they did it in 2011-12). They started off 8-0 this year, before losing their last two weeks to two strong teams. No matter, a looming regular season face-off against his brother, Sour Snails, is the only matchup left where Thien won't be favored. We figure a two game buffer is good enough here, as Dragon Warriors are always regular season beasts.

And one of the reasons Warriors win so much is their excellence at using plug-and-play guys, as they once again lead the league in moves, with 45 — almost double the next nearest owner. All those moves means coach Thien maximizes his player slots, and with his already talented team, that leads to many many wins. Overall, Dragon Warriors are third in PTS, second in AST, tops in STL and absolute last in TOs. Plus they tend to pound the boards, while surprisingly being a little light from beyond the arc, even with DeMarcus Cousins dropping in 1.8 3PT per game (!).

The core of Cousins, Damian Lillard, and John Wall are fabulous, and now Warriors can add Julius Randle to that list. If you haven’t been paying attention, Randle has been killing it this year, flashing huge AST numbers for a power forward, and averaging 13.6 PTS, 8.7 REB, 3.8 AST, on 50.1 FG% for a unique stat line. Disgruntled Rudy Gay has missed a lot of games this season, but he’s still an all-around asset when he plays. Jordan Clarkson, Mason Plumlee, and TJ Warren are nice hit-or-miss bench options, and once again all those streamed free agents maxes out everything these Dragon Warriors can do!

So Buckets (6-4)
The Buckets are back! After two non-playoff seasons, Josh’s team is in the driver’s seat for a wild card spot, and we love the trade that delivered CJ McCollum — even though they’ve only been 2-2 since acquiring him. Since arriving a month ago, McCollum has upped his scoring to 24.3 PTS on an efficient 49.8 FG%. Clearly, he likes his new home.

And how about that DeMar DeRozan! His career year has resulted in 27.5 PTS, 5.0 REB, 4.0 AST, 1.3 STL, on 47.3 FG%. With McCollum, DeRozan, and Kyrie Irving, this team can sure score. And you’ll notice that we haven’t even talked about likely Rookie of the Year Joel Embiid yet. The Process has been better than advertised is is putting up huge numbers across the board in only twenty-five minutes a game. Embiid has paired with Rudy Gobert to stiffen up Buckets’ interior defense — first in the league — and also gives them a strong low post presence.

On top of all that, old hand Deron Williams is quietly averaging 6.8 AST and 1.7 3PT, picking up a bit of the slack for Jamal Crawford’s erratic season. The only other down note on this team has been Aaron Gordon’s so-so numbers, as he hasn’t received the role nor the minutes to continue last season’s late season domination. Still, we absolutely love this team and this lineup is drool worthy for its upside. There are still two H2H matchups with division leader Dragon Warriors on the block, so there’s an outside chance Buckets could take Voltron, but if not, they’ll still likely charge right back into the playoffs.

Team Cameltoe (4-6)
So how’s our other new owner doing? We predicted that Cameltoe would be an immediate playoff contender but perhaps we were too hasty. They started the season off 1-4 (their lone win was versus Jedi Knights) but looking closer, we can see that they were facing off against three current division leaders, plus another likely playoff team. Rough schedule! Since then Felipe’s team has gone a respectable 3-2 and has an outside chance at a post-season berth.

Guess who’s leading this team in GP? How about iron man Eric Gordon, who has been a man born anew in Houston. He’s averaging 17.7 PTS and a league leading 3.8 3PT. No wonder Cameltoe is good from beyond the arc, despite their point guard combo of Elfrid Payton and Derrick Rose not being prolific 3PT shooters. Both have been pressed into duty as Mike Conley has been fighting off injuries all year.

The big three of Anthony Davis, Carmelo Anthony, and Brook Lopez have been all just about as expected, with Davis regaining his almost fantasy MVP form -- 28.9 PTS, 11.8 REB, 4.0 STL/BLK is good right? -- and nobody suffering any debilitating injuries, which has to count as a win. Plus rookie Buddy Hield just won Rookie of the Week behind some fine shooting. Whew, so Hield isn’t a bust!

In general, Cameltoe is good in 3PT and BLK, not so great at FG%, and pretty terrible at REB, ranking second-to-last. Could a big man be added here? Still, overall Felipe’s team looks great on paper, and we foresee plenty of wins coming. Just one more victory will equal Morrie’s Pogiboys win total from last season, and we think Cameltoe can do much better than that. Part of the issue may be a lack of moves, as Felipe is learning the ropes about for our GP cap, but those issues will iron themselves out soon probably.

Snack Bears (0-10)
We already looked at the winless Snack Bears two weeks ago. Since then nothing much has changed. They’re second-to-last in FT%, poor in PTS and 3PT, and can’t really AST or STL for their lives. But at least they’re strong in FG%, BLK, and TOs! More importantly, they’re currently engaged in a 0-10 battle against Jedi Knights, and this represents their best chance at not going winless this season. Have we ever had two 0-10 teams going head-to-head? I doubt it, so this is kind of a historic week for SlamNation. We'll be keeping a close eye on this one...

A Toilet Bowl appearance is already assured for Snack, but Brandon could be making moves to insure a deep consolation run. And they’ll need it because this roster could sure use one of next season’s highly touted rookie point guards — Jeremy Lin is back on the shelf. Other injuries also continue to hound Snack, but Derrick Favors is back at least. And we’ve got flashes of life from rookies Dragan Bender and Jaylen Brown, and Michael Carter-Williams might have just fallen into a starting role. Anyway, let’s just hope we don’t have any winless teams this year, go go Brandon!

Mid-Season 2017: Transformers

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We’re at ten weeks in, meaning we’re halfway through and looking toward the playoffs. Now that football is behind us, we can fully focus on fantasy basketball! Let’s take a look at Transformers division, which we had dubbed "officially the most competitive division in SlamNation” just three short months ago… [2017 Preview | 2016 Mid-Season]

Another Bad Creation (6-4)
While our defending division champs have a two game lead on the rest of the pack, ABC is actually only the third best team in Chamberlain conference this year, as they are behind two Silverhawks teams in win/loss. After starting off 2-2, ABC got four wins in a row -- albeit against pretty weak competition -- before dropping their last two games in close matches. And now they’re about to face five of six opponents who are all over 0.500. Get ready Oliver!

So far it’s been the Kevin Durant show, as expected, as he’s averaging 25.7 PTS, 8.7 REB, 4.7 AST, 1.9 3PT, 1.5 BLK, and 1.1 STL on 53.7 FG%. "M-V-P, M-V-P!” Adding a second / double alpha in Dwyane Wade was an excellent move, and let’s not forget LaMarcus Aldridge in the frontcourt too. Other good news includes Wesley Matthews’ return to full health and 3.0 3PT and 1.5 STL per game from him, along with steadying work at point guard from Sergio Rodriguez — now TJ McConnell as Rodriguez recovers.

It hasn’t been all sunshine and rainbows though, as Greg Monroe, Jahlil Okafor, and old man Dirk Nowitzki hasn’t exactly lived up to preseason promises. Monroe and Okafor aren’t getting more than 20+ minutes of playing time to show their stuff and Dirk is only just now suiting up for work. There is some nice spot shooting help on the bench behind Marcus Morris and Terrence Ross, but this team needs a dose of help on the boards — and FG% — more than anything else. Anyway, if the all offense / no defense big man trio can can pick up their games, Another Bad Creation could capture the first back-to-back division titles in Transformers history!

Squirtle Squad (4-6)
The good news is Squirtles have already outpaced last season’s three wins. The bad news is three of those wins have come against the worst teams in the league. Right now they’re second in Transformers but outside looking in on the playoffs, and they’ll need to pick it up if they hope to get to the postseason. Buuuuut, who cares! Because Dark Giannis has fully arrived! Antetokounmpo is eligible for four ESPN positions, shoots 53.6 FG%, scores 23.8 PTS, grabs 9.0 REB, dishes 5.9 AST, and st(bl)ocks for a combined 3.8!!! On top of that, Zach LaVine has also been dumping in 20.9 PTS and 2.9 3PT, while the two of them provide nightly dunk dunk dunk highlights. Who needs the postseason?!?

Well, GM Brian would probably like to get some better coaching involved — bad FT%, not much ball movement -- he’s been busy scouring the waiver wire for talent and has already shifted through a mass of bodies. Aside from Nikola Vucevic (still underrated) and Goran Dragic (same), there’s not a whole lot going on here. Mo Harkless (keeps auto-correcting to “Mo Harmless”) has emerged as a nice swingman option, and Josh Richardson has been finding his scoring groove post-injury, but otherwise this team is just waiting for rookie Marquese Chriss to get more minutes and for Chandler Parsons to prove that he can stay on the court.

We’re not really sure where Squirtles are headed this season, as a hard schedule awaits, but who cares, Giiiiiiiaaaaannnnis is taking over!

LA Buffy (3-7)
Is Isaiah Thomas a better offensive player than Isiah Thomas, or am I just a heavily biased Celtics fan? I mean, the non-HOF version of Isaiah is throwing up 27.9 PTS, 6.1 AST, and 2.6 3PT on 45.0 FG% this season. For his career the Pistons’ Isiah’s highest scoring season average was 22.9 ppg, and he only shot 29.0% from three… Should Thomas Jr. book his ticket to Springfield?!

At least someone from Buffy will get to travel somewhere nice this season, as Roger’s team isn’t likely to get to their 0.500 record of a year ago. This year’s version of Buffy has a terrible FG%, is second to last in AST, and is dead last to STL. They hit their FTs and take care of the ball though! The four man frontline of Tristan Thompson, Robin Lopez, Kenneth Faried, and Zach Randolph are all kind of having so-so seasons, with none of them close to approaching a double-double. And even as big as they are, they can only get Buffy to slightly below average in REB.

At least Thomas is getting scoring help from Danilo Gallinari and George Hill, who are both having excellent seasons. Hill, especially, has been killing it in Utah to the tune of 18.8 PTS on a shocking 54.7 FG%. That other Utah vet though, Joe Johnson, should be put out to pasture soon. There’s an outside chance Buffy has the firepower to make some noise in the eventual Toilet Bowl, but some of that hope rests on Brandon Ingram showing some more, well, everything. In a not so slight 27.4 minutes per game, the #2 overall pick can’t get many STL or BLK with those long arms. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many consecutive zeros on a player’s steals and blocks scorecard column before! Take a look. But Ingram will get better, and so will Buffy. It’ll just take some time.

Sager’s Suits and Ties (2-8)
We covered the then one-win SST two weeks ago, and since then they’ve gone 0.500! Sure it was a win versus a winless team but as an replacement owner, Matt will take it! The news is bleak however for Blake Griffin, who has now hurt his other knee and could face a few weeks on the IR — just as Victor Oladipo comes off of it. Suits and Ties won’t hit an easy patch in their schedule again, and they’ll have to just get ready for a Toilet Bowl run and a nice bunk in the cellar.

The irony is that huge injury risk Bradley Beal has stayed healthy and is playing great — 22.0 PTS, 2.8 3PT, 45.3 FG% — and he has Oladipo and Louis Williams as his mini-clones, but it would help if someone other than Draymond Green could protect the rim — even Steven Adams only averages 0.9 BLK and is actually better at STLs. We’re not saying Green can’t do it all, but he’s been unhappy with his team’s effort even amid injuries. But still, all in all, Matt has just been feeling out SlamNation before he prepares to crush us all in the near future. Let’s wish him luck in the near future plotting our demise!

Russell 2017: Voltron

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Here we go with this year's draft recap and team previews. We welcomed in two new owners and celebrated the back-to-back championships of Sour Snails, who have officially reached villain status. We also took a look at our league history, and if you're looking for some more numbers, here's our breakdown from 2014 of weekly averages and how they can help. [2016 Mid-Season]
Header formatting: #2017DraftPickPosition: TeamName (2016SeasonRecord, 2015SeasonRecord)

#4 Team Cameltoe (5-12-2, 14-5)
No stranger to sixteen team leagues, new owner Felipe inherits a team that is built around Anthony Davis. The dispersal draft mixed things up, and Davis will now be flanked with Carmelo Anthony, Brook Lopez, Elfrid Payton, Mike Conley, and Derrick Rose. That’s a pretty solid keeper core. And it’s also one built to win now. As in, right now!

With that in mind, Cameltoe went with a mix young and old for his draft. Rookie gunner Buddy Hield will be counted on to man the starting shooting guard spot, and if he’s not ready, Eric Gordon will be ready to fire away in his stead -- last round pick, rookie Denzel Valentine will struggle to make the roster. And there will be quite the competition for the starting PF/C slot too, as Dwight Powell, Montrelz Harrell, and Larry Nance, Jr. were all scooped up to compete for minutes. It’s possible Melo could just slide down to power forward, opening up a starting gig for Wilson Chandler, who is an excellent fantasy player when healthy. Overall, we’re looking at Cameltoe to compete right away for a postseason berth, and if Brow can stay healthy — not to mention Melo, Lopez, and Rose — Cameltoe could be set to do some damage.

#6 So Buckets (8-10-1, 8-10-1)
After two divisional titles in 2013-4, So Buckets started to sink toward mediocrity. Well, we’re here to say that this might be our favorite rising team in SlamNation. An intensely young keeper roster is now seasoned and ready to explode onto the scene. And if nagging injuries are behind them, So Buckets has all the pieces to once again challenge for a Voltron title.

You know exactly what you’re getting with Kyrie Irving and DeMar DeRozan: Lots of scoring, some ancillary stats, and decent percentages. Rudy Gobert had an off season last year but still averaged 11.0 REB and 2.2 BLK. Now he’ll have Myles Turner helping him out, not to mention the NBA debut of Joel Embiid, who could be the next Hakeem Olajuwon. Haha, maybe. And then there’s Aaron Gordon, who is ready for a breakout to his breakout last year. Add in this year’s RD1 pick, Dario Saric, and So Buckets is brimming over with potential. Even Alex Len might average close to a double-double down in Phoenix. (Don’t forget RD5 pick Dante Exum!) Old hands Deron Williams and Jamal Crawford were nice value picks and they’ll help take Josh’s team back above 0.500. Young Jerami Grant might get a lot of run at small forward for the 76ers, but who knows what's gonna happen with that team, aside from an Embiid explosion!

#10 Snack Bears (10-9, 8-11)
Nobody expected fantasy rookie Brandon to pilot his team to the playoffs but he sure did, and unearthed Kristaps Prozingis with the 2016 #6 overall pick to boot — after Emmanuel Mudiay, Jahlil Okafor, and Stanley Johnson. He’ll anchor a front court that features Derrick Favors and Dwight Howard, the rare big men who average over 1.0 STL and 1.5 BLK apiece. (Gorgui Dieng would have been a third, if he hadn’t been moved in late December for Evan Fournier.)  Fournier and Kentavious Caldwell-Pope are excellent swingmen, with Fournier set to explode this season. And we couldn’t be higher on Taiwanese-American son, Jeremy Lin, who finally gets to pilot his own team again — in Brandon’s new Brooklyn home no less.

Snack Bears’ draft featured another highly touted Euro, Dragan Bender, who could be another Porzingis, given some time. And Brandon Jennings and Michael Carter-Williams are both backups in real life, as well as on this team. With his strengths in REB, BLK, TO, the Bears sort of play a version of big ball, and Brandon filled out the rest of his roster with Bismack Biyombo, Timofey Mozgov, and Domantas Sabonis. With an extra year to refine his team, can the Bears keep ascending the pecking order?

#12 Death Star (11-6-2, 13-5-1)
After starting off the season 6-0-2, Death Star took a bit of a stumble the rest of the year but still ended up winning Voltron division by one game. They handled business in round one of the playoffs but were bounced in the conference finals. Can they do better this year? The duo of John Wall and Damian Lillard are the second best backcourt pairing in the league — next to brother Trieu’s Curry and Westbrook combo — and now he’ll have DeMarcus Cousins and Rudy Gay to add additional firepower. Losing Hassan Whiteside will hurt a lot in FG% and BLK, but Cousins is a fantasy monster and Thien wasn’t winning FG% often anyway.

Adding Gay gives this team a scoring wing option they haven’t had in years — when they were known as Super Ninja, in 2013, with Paul Pierce — and he’s going to fit this team perfectly. Julius Randle played out his pretty much rookie year and put up an easy double double, and he was joined by preseason trade acquisition, and fellow Laker, Jordan Clarkson. Hopefully both will continue to grow.

Death Star's draft was missing a first rounder, from the Cousins trade, but they managed to grab a lot of power forward options: Mason Plume, Taj Gibson, and Terrence Jones. And Gary Harris could add a bit of punch to the backcourt, but he’ll need to compete for shots in a crowded Nuggets rotation. And last round pick TJ Warren has now been officially named the starter for the Suns. Overall, we know what Death Star is gonna do: score score and score, and most likely, win win win. The only question is how far Wall and Lillard can take them this season...