2016 Championship: Best Ever, Bar None

Well, history has been made. An undefeated season, an undefeated post-season, and back-to-back titles for Trieu’s Sour Snails. let’s take a step back and look at that accomplishment. Heck, let’s look at what owner Trieu has been able to do in his seven years since our cycle reset back in 2010 -- and they won a title in 2008. Sour Snails was our first new champion in 2010, and then followed that up by making the finals the following year, losing only to a major upset. They collapsed after that year into the Toilet Bowl, but won Damian Lillard as the #2 overall selection in 2013. That only translated to two spectacular regular seasons — and another two upset playoff appearances — before Snails embarked on its current epic run. 36-1-1 plus 6-0 in the playoffs. Heady stuff.

And it’s not like Trieu has just been sitting idly by while his team dominates. He's been one of most active owners, both on the waiver wire and on the trading lines. And some huge names too. He had LeBron James, traded him. He had pre-Cleveland Kevin Love, traded him. He stole Russell Westbrook for Josh Smith (and Andre Drummond). He moved Lillard. He moved DeMarcus Cousins. He kept on winning and winning and winning through it all. (The trade of Cousins now looks prescient as Boogie missed three of championship week’s games, and that clearly would have had an effect on the title bout.) It’s hard to come up with more superlatives for Sour Snails, except to say that they should consider a name change to “Super Saiyan Snails” or something, because they are anything but sour.

The championship game was close though, and it came down to the last few games on Sunday. Team Spade had an outside shot at an upset but then Jimmy Butler came through with his fifth game of the week, shooting 10/11 from the field to help Snails steal FG%. By the time Stephen Curry stepped out on Sunday afternoon to can nine 3PT on 61.9 FG%, the champagne was already chilling in the Snails’ locker room.

What more is there to say about this team? Trieu not only has proven to have the best team but also shown time and time again that he’s the best GM in the business. Even minor moves like Evan Fournier for Gorgui Dieng turned out well. Getting Jordan Clarkson, Jerami Grant, and Luol Deng during hot streaks pushed Trieu’s super six core even further ahead. Even the move for Dirk Nowitzki, which didn't enhance anything, could pay dividends down the line.

Imagine what could happen next year as Snails owns two first round selections , as a result of the Cousins trade. Can anyone step up and beat Snails?!? Let’s go guys. Let’s not let “Snails” become synonymous with “Bulls” or “Lakers” and get them into three-peat land. For now, congratulations Trieu, for showing the rest of the league what a dedicated, involved, and classy champion looks like.

As for Spade, hopefully Randall is happy with his Finals performance. Taking Snails down to the wire was no small feat. Especially when Jrue Holiday ended up injured as the week went on. Kawhi Leonard came back to post two huge games but his two missed ones truly hurt, thrusting the likes of Patrick Beverley, Brandon Jennings, and Kobe Bryant into service. And since we’re Kobe haters here, we’d argue that Kobe’s 11-28, 39.3 FG% showing on Sunday might have been the one that lost FG% for Spade. Sure, Bryant had a gaudy 34 PTS but that wasn’t enough was it? The upset formula would have taken more 3PT anyway, and Spade fell just two short.

Still, with a perfectly balanced roster, plus the find that is rookie Devin Booker, it’s very possible Spade could make a return showing in next year’s Finals as they’ve gone 12-7, 12-7, 15-4 in owner Randall’s three years with us, along with back-to-back division titles. Let's hope they can rise to the challenge next season!

2016 Toilet Bowl: Big Loser, Again

And just like we had a repeat winner in the Finals, last year’s Toilet Bowl winner took the crown again also. Funk Coalition won the rights to 2016 #1 draft pick Karl-Anthony Towns — who averaged 17.8 PTS, 13.3 REB, 4.5 AST, 1.0 BLK and 1.0 3PT for the week — and will get the chance to add another foundational piece in next year’s draft.

Funk started off the week hot and kept up the pressure from there, eventually taking FG% from Buffy, which was likely their category to lose. It was a big week for the Detroit Pistons and Funk cashed in with Marcus Morris (9 3PT), Andre Drummond, and Tobias Harris all contributing across the board. At the end of the day, coach Jon cruised to an easy victory and will be excited to transform his loser team into a so-so team with the help of two #1 overall selections.

Note: Pogiboys nearly pulled back-to-back Toilet Bowl victories in 2013-4, but even with the addition of Anthony Davis and Victor Oladipo, have only managed to regress since a stellar 2015.

As for Buffy, they’ll have to face the off-season knowing that they’ll get a great college guy to pair with Isaiah Thomas and Khris Middleton. It was an impressive coaching job by Buffy during their Toilet Bowl run but in the end they just couldn’t quite avoid the upset. Still, getting the #2 overall draft could result in Ben Simmons or Brandon Ingraham, coinciding with one of the two likely to become a Laker too. Owner Roger must be overjoyed at the prospect.