2010 Championship: Kingdom Come

After annihilating the competition during the regular season, suffering just one loss and one tie, the Sour Snails were heavy favorites to win the 2010 championship. While they did indeed finish out the season and prove their dominance, it wasn't easy. There were quite a few unexpected bumps during the playoffs as they barely squeaked by the Fat Jubas (tied heading into the last day), very barely beat back Half Man Half ImAsian (it took some amazing FG% and PTS numbers on Sunday, mostly from LBJ, to seal the win), almost suffered the biggest upset in SlamNation history against the Chunky Monkeys.

There was some controversy during the Finals week as the Monkeys made a clerical error and filled their lineup to the max, negating their Sunday games. Gracious as ever, Snails' owner Trieu offered to count the crucial last few games, even though going by the strict letter of the law would have ensured a victory. That set up a very exciting Sunday slate of games, which caused at least four fans to faint and another sixty sent home for overly exuberant celebrations.

The return of Chris Paul for a full week was huge to Evan's upset chances, and while he averaged nearly 10 AST per game, Paul's scoring and steals numbers were off his normal pace. What CP3's return did however was drastically reduce Snails' rookie Darren Collison's contributions, which really hurt Trieu's lineup.

Still the combination of top picks Lebron James (30.7 PTS, 9.7 REB, 7.3 AST, 1.3 STL) , Josh Smith (15 PTS, 9.7 REB, 4.7 AST, 2.3 BLK), and Gerald Wallace (15.0 PTS and 9.0 REB), flanked by Stephen Curry (19.7 PTS, 9.3 AST, 2.3 3PT, 1.3 STL) and Aaron Brooks (18.3 PTS, 7.0 AST, 2.0 3PT) proved to be too much for the Monkeys.

In the end, the Snails showed class and character and deserve every diamond on their soon to be received twelve carat championship ring. Plus one championship for the Chamberlain Conference and the Silverhawks division. This is Trieu's second SlamNation championship, and his team could be set for a huge repeat next year. Congratulations!

Let's not overlook the amazing post-season the Monkeys had however, toppling both Russell Conference division leaders, Nande ReBuRonSAN and Bayside Bombardiers in consecutive weeks. In the end, they lost 3-5-1, tying 3PT, winning the crucial STL category, and coming up just short in FG%. They proved that just getting into the playoffs gives any team a chance for success. Late in the season, coach Evan had all but given up on his playoff chances but he slipped in and pulled off a Butler-like run to the Finals.

In the end, the Monkeys were outdone by poor shooting. Trevor Ariza (7.0 PTS, 25 FG%), Rasual Butler (11.0 PTS, 34.0 FG%), Andrea Bargnani (19.5 PTS, 39.4 FG%), and Chris Paul (10.8 PTS, 42.2 FG%). Only Brandon Roy shot the ball well, with 18.0 PTS on 46.2 FG%. Strangely, Trieu had LBJ and Curry shooting over twenty shots a game but at only 47.1 FG% and 38.3 FG% respectively, which means the other guys really stepped up their accuracy during the championship week, burying open shots as James and Curry drew defenders away. Nets' rookie Terrence Williams was especially potent, hitting about half his shots on fourteen attempts per game. Williams for MVP?

Let's talk about Trieu the general manager. While we were skeptical of his draft, Trieu proved all the analysts wrong by taking the right people and focusing on an incredible small ball team that could also compete in REB and BLK. And what about the fifth round selection of Stephen Curry, a Nostradamus-like move. At that point in the draft, no rookies had been taken yet but Trieu had the foresight to tag Curry ahead of Brandon Jennings, Tyreke Evans, and Blake Griffin. Over the playoff run, Curry averaged 20.4 PTS 7.5 AST, 4.5 REB, 2.8 3PT, and 1.9 STL, becoming the second offensive option and perfectly complementing Lebron. Add in the contributions of fellow rookies Chris Douglas-Roberts, Dejuan Blair, Darren Collision, and the aforementioned Terrence Williams and it's safe to say that Trieu has an eye for young talent.

Heck, he won the entire thing despite carrying just one center eligible player into the playoffs, sophomore Clippers big man DeAndre Jordan, who had almost 7 PTS/REB and 1 BLK per game. Okay, I'm just gushing at this point. Needless to say, Trieu had the Midas touch this season and we're looking forward to his continued success in future years. The Sour Snails are at the top of the heap and have the youth and talent to stay there, not to mention the rights to Lebron James for infinity!

2010 Toilet Bowl: The Golden Ticket

Despite a big slide at the end of the regular season and falling out of the playoffs, Thien really pulled his game together and ended up with a great consolidation prize: the number one overall pick in next year's draft. While he started off the playoffs a little slow, he picked up steam and dispatched his opponents 5-4, 6-2-1, and 7-2. The Toilet Bowl Finals versus Buffy looked like it might be tough matchup on paper, especially missing franchise center Andrew Bynum, but Thien's team handily won REB and BLK, along with just about everything else.

Roger's team had Marc Gasol and Randy Foye ailing, but Tim Duncan, Lamar Odom, Mehmet Okur, Carlos Boozer, and Danny Granger all had pretty full schedules. Buffy's deep squad came out of the gates stumbling and never recovered, opening the door for a pounding at the hands of the Golden Dragons / Hot Gems / Golden One (Thien changed his name during each week of the playoffs in an effort to sell more merchandise, savvy).

Leading the way for Golden One was Dwayne Wade (30.7 PTS, 6.7 REB, 4.3 AST, 1.7 STL, 1.0 BLK during the week), who gave everything he had during the season, avoided the injury list, and produced like the ultra superstar that he is. Co-captain Paul Pierce contributed mightily with an all around effort, notching 19 PTS and nearly 5 REB/AST per game. And while Mike Miller, Al Harrington, and Raymond Felton may not strike immediate fear into opposing fans, they all came through in dream fashion, contributing 3PT, STL, and AST across the board. And a special prize must go to Chris Kaman, who dominated the inside with 18.8 PTS, 12.5 REB, and 1.5 BLK over his past four games.

With this Toilet Bowl championship, Thien's team will be guaranteed a great player next season and will likely do better than this year's 9-9 record. Amazing job Golden Gem Dragons!

As a side note, with Trieu and Thien both winning during the playoffs, this must be the most successful GM sibling pair in league history. It's as if John and Jim Paxson had both collected championships during their front office tenures. Mama must be so proud of her boys! And insiders say that their older brother, Tony, is no slouch in the basketball department either. Triple threat!

Toilet Bowl Finals

#5 Hot Gems (9-9) vs #6 LA Buffy
The race is on for the number one pick next year. Recent hauls at the number one position have included Kevin Durant and Michael Beasley, with Durant vaulting the Sour Snails from a worst-to-first championship in 2007-2008. So this Toilet Bowl could have huge implications as the early clear prize is Kentucky's John Wall, a franchise caliber point guard. Of course, second prize might not be too bad either, as forward Ohio State's Evan Turner is a potential do-everything type fantasy player. So who will be competing for the honor of selecting first? It looks like it'll be Roger's Buffy from the Chamberlain Conference and Thiens' Hot Gems from the Russells.

After neatly disposing of non-contender Jedi Knights in RD1, Buffy faced division foe (and higher seeded despite the same record) Squirtle Squad. The Squirtles took out league weakling Fobstars easily but ran out of steam against Buffy, losing 2-6-1 as Shaun Livingston made an appearance for one game. Shaun Livingston! With Danny Granger heating up big time, Roger's team is poised for a Toilet Bowl win, one that could land them the perfect piece to go along their enviable big man lineup of Tim Duncan, Carlos Boozer, Lamar Odom, Marc Gasol, and Mehmet Okur. While old vet Andre Miller has been more than serviceable, getting a young stud like Wall could really top off an up and down season for Buffy.

Don't start the parade yet though, because the Hot Gems have patched things together after collapsing over the last few weeks of the regular season. Instead of being in the playoffs, the Gems slip slopped into the Toilet Bowl (allowing the Chunky Monkeys to sneak in and be on their Cinderella ride to the Finals) and barely dispatched the Human Amoebas and Funk Coalition. And they weren't pretty victories either, as they won by 3 PTS in their matchup against the putrid Amoebas and barely squeaked by the horrendous Funk. Led by Dwayne Wade and Paul Pierce, the former Golden Dragons are a little thin across the board and could be primed for an upset. A 26 PTS, 17 REB outburst by Al Harrington gave Thien's team the early week lead but there's still a lot of games to go. The big man duo of Chris Kaman and Theo Ratliff will really have to work the boards and protect the rim if Gems wants to win.

The good news for these two teams is that both Wall and Turner are slated to be superstars. While getting a point guard is priority one for both squads, I doubt Turner would be a bad consolidation prize. The 2011 Draft is shaping up to be Durant-Oden Part II so it'll be exciting to see who escapes with the first overall pick. Congrats to Hot Gems and Buffy for making it to the Toilet Bowl finals!

Championship Preview

#1 Sour Snails (16-1-1) vs #4 Chunky Monkeys (9-9)
With both teams emerging out of a fast and furious finish from the previous week, the dust settled (just barely) on Sunday night. By the time midnight rolled around, it was the Chunky Monkeys versus the Sour Snails. With both teams relatively healthy (the Monkeys are missing Harden and Chandler) while the Snails are missing Josh Howard, this will be a clash of the titan (and non-titan in the case of the Monkeys).

This match-up is a juxtaposition of opposites.

• 1 vs. 2. It features the first and second overall pick in Lebron James -- who's been in a stratosphere by himself this year and the incomparable CP3 -- a potential bust who's missed a large portion of this season with a serious knee injury.
• Perfect vs Perfect. 100% on Calc AB vs 100% on Calc AB (this is a private matter between Trieu and Evan)
• 1 vs. 8. Mostly importantly It features the first seed and the 8th seed. The Snails, who by and large cruised to one of the most dominant seasons in history, have been the run-away favorites all season. WIth the exception of a mid-season, asterisk highlighted all-star week loss to Buffy, the Snails never lost a game all season. Headlined by the ridiculous LBJ, the Snails feature athletic freaks like Crash, J-Smoove and unbelievable young funs including Steph Curry, Aaron Brooks, Darren Collison. Honestly, the team doesn't need much else. The question is whether the young bucks can keep it up for this last week. There are signs of slow down in Brooks, Collison is losing minutes to CP3 and Steph Curry has been undoubtedly knicked up these last several weeks.

On the other side of the table, the Monkeys limped in to the playoffs with little expectations. In fact, team brass, with CP3 out with a knee injury, basically admitted defeat mid-season with the trade of Danny Granger and Memo Okur for the then-injured BRoy and young but unproven talent like Wilson Chandler and Channing Frye. However, with some luck (Thien's team suffered an unimaginable choke-job from a 5-game slide) and some timely wins, the Monkeys found themselves as the final seed of the playoffs.

There are a few underlying stories in this matchup. This is expected to be Chris Paul's first full week back at full strength (as illustrated by his 15 point and 13 dimes effort last night). However, the counter to this is that the Snail's super sleeper Darren Collison has taken a big hit to his PT. While Collison has still been filling up the stat-sheet, it'll be interesting to see how this all plays out. The Monkeys have had a few players step up in recent weeks including new starters, Jrue Holiday (thanks to doghouse bound Lou Williams) and Channing Frye (freak injury to Robin Lopez) while Snail stars Aaron Brooks J-Smoove have hit a bit of a rut.

That said, this is still a classic David and Goliath matchup. The mighty Snails are the unquestioned Goliaths. The Monkeys aren't even quite David's at this point. They are David's puny younger brother. The Monkeys will need their two captains in CP3 and BRoy7 to play like all-stars to have a chance. The Snails have 4-5 all-stars on their rosters alone so the Monkeys will need their entire lineup to step up if they are to have a chance.

[Editor's note] Both teams have been in the Finals before, with a similarly outmatched squad (on paper) from Season 1 for the Monkeys and a winning season from the Snails in Season 2. Back in 2008, they even met in the playoffs for a round. Is this the biggest rivalry in SlamNation? Let's find out who wins first eh?

Playoffs: Conference Finals

CHAMBERLAIN CONFERENCE
#1 Sour Snails (16-1-1) vs #3 Half Man Half ImAsian (11-7)
There was almost a major upset in SlamNation as the Sour Snails were tied with Fat Jubas heading into the last day of games. As it was, they barely won the 3PT, STL and BLK categories. Only a combined seven threes by Lebron James, Steph Curry, and Danilo Gallinari (plus a huge game winning block by LBJ in the closing seconds) enabled the Snails to move ahead. Whew, disaster averted! It must be troubling that the Snails were taken to the wire but the Jubas always play them tough so maybe their toughest competition is over.

Then again, they face a successful Cinderella this week as Half Man Half Amazing took down number two seed Korea! Korea! without breaking a sweat, neatly capturing six categories by a wide margin. It didn't help that Dwight Howard only played two games for Korea! and was outblocked 10 to 5 by JaVale McGee. The only players who remotely showed up to play for Steve's team was Manu Ginobili and Vince Carter, and they couldn't fend off an explosive Kevin Durant and Troy Murphy.

So what now? Do the Snails recover from a scare or do they have another unexpected fight on their hands? In their one regular season matchup, Trieu defeated Oliver 5-4 but by pretty wide margins in all the categories. They should dominate all the small ball categories and then it's up to REB and BLK to determine the winner. If McGee and Murphy keep throwing up double doubles for Half Man Half Asian, the Snails might be in trouble. And ho shit, what about Drew Gooden's 26 point 20 rebound effort on Tuesday night? Only to be somewhat offset by Gerald Wallace's 17-19. And what about Kevin Durant's 45 points on Monday? King James, Trieu needs you to power him into the Finals! This could be a real battle and both teams have their stars going a near full schedule. This is the marquee matchup of the week for sure.

RUSSELL CONFERENCE
#2 Bayside Bombardiers (11-7) vs #4 Chunky Monkeys (9-9)
Talking about upsets, the Monkeys pulled one off while the Bombardiers narrowly avoided falling victim to one. Let's start with the Monkeys, who cruised to a big upset over Nande by carrying their end of regular season momentum into the playoffs. As Mikey's team got decimated by injuries --six players felled, prompting him to ask for help from the league office to fill out games played -- Evan's squad took advantage behind Trevor Ariza (9 STL, 13 AST), Jrue Holiday (5 3PT, 8 STL, 18 AST), and Channing Frye (7 3PT). That's right, the stars of this team were nowhere to be found but Brandon Roy, Andrea Bargnani, and hypothetically Chris Paul will need to step up if they want to defeat the Bombardiers. Toppling a one seed was hard but they'll need more to do it again.

We saw Pierre's team as a potential upset victim because their #2 versus #3 seed matchup was a bit of a misnomer but they dispatched 100 Acre Wood Heffalumps through a hard fought week of 30+ games for each team. They squeaked out wins in 3PT and TO, while tying REB, on the way to a 5-3-1 victory. They have Pau Gasol, David West, and Jamal Crawford all playing well and Mo Williams returned for some big numbers. Center Samuel Dalembert is averaging nearly a double double with two blocks per game and if he can keep it up, he'll be a big reason for the Bombardiers' playoff success.

Generally speaking, this is a classic small ball versus big ball matchup. The Bombardiers are loaded inside while the Monkeys have smooth shooters as their big men. As it stands now, the fight could be over AST since the Monkeys are a little light in that department without CP3 at full strength. One of these teams will barely lose the PTS or TO category and that could be the cause of their defeat. This is going to be an intriguing matchup and the outcome could hinge on Paul returning for major minutes as soon as possible. Who will represent the Russells in the Finals? We can't tell either!