Draft Day Moves

The end of the draft got pretty ugly, with quite a few players being picked based solely on one double digit scoring or rebounding game. I mean, who is Omri Casspi, Dahntay Jones, or Luc Mbah a Moute? This is like the worst case spelling bee NBA edition. The most mysterious player however, has to be Oleksiy Pecherov. The seven footer lit up the Celtics for 24 points earlier in the week and then gathered 9 rebounds and 2 blocks in last night's effort versus Milwaukee. But Oleksiy woke up this morning to find out that his skills were so valued he'd already been traded in SlamNation before one game had even been played. Team Moribe flipped Pecherov to Sour Snails for Mr. Irrelevant, Corey Maggette -- and didn't even give Pecherov a chance to clean out his locker.

Asked why he moved so quickly to dump Pecherov, a budding fan favorite, GM Mikey said, "We didn't want any Russians on our team. I'm pro-USA, we wanted Americans only. Plus, we have Ben Wallace and Jermaine O'Neal at the center position. That should be plenty." Informed that Pecherov was Ukrainian, Mikey shot back, "What the f***'s the difference?!" The Cold War ended twenty years ago but Team Moribe is still determined to keep America safe. Good for them.

In other draft trading news, Funk Coalition and Half Man Half ImAsian had swapped multiple draft pick positions starting with Round Seven, as the Funk dearly coveted Joakim Noah. In the end, the trade ended up looking like this: Joakim Noah, Chris Duhon, Tyson Chandler, and Francisco Garcia versus Marreese Speights, Kirk Hinrich, Anthony Parker, and Beno Udrih. SlamNation experts say GM Jon paid too much for the part time services of Noah but he insists that it was a great deal. We'll see.