Mid-Season 2018: Thundercats

An odds-on title winner runs rampant, momentarily stopped by a family member, while a former bottom dweller finally emerges from the depths. [Pre-season 2018]

Chunky Monkeys (14-1)
For awhile there, Evan’s team threatened to go undefeated this regular season, before getting upended by cousin Eddie in WK14. That’s good news I guess. The bad news for the rest of SlamNation is that James Harden is back and he just dropped a historic sixty-point triple double… Since building a super team two years ago, Monkeys have been focused on only one goal, the championship, so all this regular season success won’t mean much to their fans. After getting bounced in the first round after a one-loss season last year, coach Evan needs to stay focused. Let’s hope he doesn’t have any vacations schedule for April this year…

Returning a duo of Harden and LeBron James gives Monkeys the top two MVP candidates, and even with Kyle Lowry struggling, the emergence of sophomore Kris Dunn has given this team even more backcourt dominance. Moving on from Serge Ibaka to Clint Capela was also the right choice, keeper wise, as Capela is having a breakout season. With two MVP candidates, a strong frontline (Capela, Marc Gasol), a plethora of useful wings (Otto Porter Jr., Caris LeVert, Allen Crabbe) — not to meant a weakened Sour Snails, and injuries to DeMarcus Cousins and John Wall for Thien’s team — this version of the Monkeys better win the title! Or else...

Funk Coalition (10-4-1)
Despite commissioning this league for years and years, Jon’s team hasn’t had a winning season until now. In a stunning twist, Funk Coalition is actually good! They’re middle of the pack in most categories, lead the league in FG%, and are poised for their second playoff appearance. The payoff of winning two straight Toilet Bowls is finally here, as Karl-Anthony Towns and ROY candidate Ben Simmons are both franchise cornerstones.  This year’s draft also brought in a fine rookie, Jayson Tatum, who has flashed star potential from early on.

And while keepers Derrick Favors and Kentavious Caldwell-Pope have been wildly inconsistent, the return of Nikola Mirotic and the mid-season trade for Josh Richardson has replaced them in the lineup to delightful results. Freed from the albatross of punting four/five categories, Funk is on a month long winning streak and if D’Angelo Russell can find a way to return to his early season success, Jon’s team of many wings plus KAT and Simmons could finally make some noise in something other than the Toilet Bowl!

Swamp Dragons (7-6-2)
After winning a Toilet Bowl, the expected return is a franchise level player. Well, Eddie didn’t exactly get that. Instead he got the mystery that is Markelle Fultz and Swamp management must be regretting the decision to not grab Dennis Smith Jr., as previously considered. While Swamp waits to see what it has in Fultz, the climb back to contention continues, and with a 5-1 record in recent weeks — including four wins against top teams — this team is right on track.

The strong and diverse core of Paul George, Nikola Jokic, Dennis Schroder, Andrew Wiggins, Robert Covington, and Jusuf Nurkic bring a great balance to the team. The mid-season trade for Jeff Teague has filled in the hole left by the presumptive point guard of the future, and Eric Gordon is more than qualified to be the seventh-best player on this team. Add in the intriguing Taurean Prince and Swamp may not even need Fultz to play this season to escape the Toilet Bowl after three straight appearances. Although getting a glimpse of the #1 overall pick would be nice...

Team Spade (2-13)
After four straight seasons in the playoffs, Randall is headed toward his first Toilet Bowl since entering the league. The least number of wins Spade has had in those seasons has been twelve, and with only two wins so far, it’s likely Spade is slotted into our worst record for the seasons already. Why the dramatic fall? As always: injuries.

Kawhi Leonard has played nine games, Paul Millsap sixteen, Reggie Jackson and Dion Waiters have missed time. Kevin Love just broke his hand again. Ouch ouch ouch. Currently we’re seeing five “O” designations on this team and three “DTDs.” A full 75% of this team is hurt! Is it time for Randall to consider moving away from his stellar keeper core, or is it just about waiting for the perfect moment when everyone comes back healthy to challenge for a title? Unfortunately, the only title Spade will be fighting for is a Toilet Bowl one this year. But if they can win a high pick, this team could be right back to title contention in a hurry.

Mid-Season 2018: Silverhawks

While there aren't any positional changes at first glance, once we dig in we'll see that Silverhawks are suddenly competitive as a division again, from top to bottom! [Pre-season 2018]

Sour Snails (9-6)
With six total losses, the Snails have lost more this season than their last FOUR seasons combined. They haven’t dipped to five-plus losses since 2013, which was way before their current streak of three-peat championships. Are the defending champs on the ropes? After busting out of the gate 4-1, Trieu’s team has been playing 0.500 ball, and are even on a two-game losing streak. Most troubling is that Snails only rank top two in FT% and Moves, which is weird since we’re used to seeing them dominate the leaderboard in just about every category.

While the trio of Steph Curry, Kevin Durant, and Jimmy Butler are still awesome, the insane depth here has been chipped away due to injury (Mike Conley), ineptitude (Nerlens Noel), and a change of scenery (Brook Lopez, averaging only 11.8 PTS) -- all three were trade acquisitions last year. Rookie Kyle Kuzma is leading this team in GP, and without his bright spark, we dare say that Snails would be floundering in total this season! However, a champ is still a champ until dethroned, so let’s not bury Trieu’s squad just yet...

Fat Jubas (8-7)
Chasing Snails for a division title is Jubas, who is coming off some struggles themselves, despite a winning record. They’ve already outpaced last year’s five-loss season, and with the early season loss of Gordon Hayward — plus a dozen missed games from Chris Paul — Jubas started off 2-4 before righting the ship recently and going through a four game win streak. A mid-season trade for Jrue Holiday has been a godsend as Holiday has helped steady the backcourt with career numbers, and strangely, Joe Ingles, Pau Gasol, and Robin Lopez have been the tops in GP for Eric’s team. Jubas play a slow paced, defense first, game, and they can only hope that the recent return of Myles Turner can push them toward a fight for a Silverhawks title.

Fob Stars (6-8-1)
It looks like Fob Stars is treading water, headed toward a 0.500 record yet again, and without much hope for a post-season berth. A recent loss to one-win Spade has to be bad for team morale, but perhaps the newly traded Tobias Harris can pump his career best numbers even higher in Clipperland. And there are other bright spots on this team. Namely the semi-emergence of Jamal Murray, who has been playing great recently, and the drafting of rookie John Collins, who projects to be a double double machine soon.

Collins and DeAndre Jordan form a nice bouncy duo up front, and Kemba Walker is still one of the most underrated fantasy assets around. And Walker is only twenty-seven, which is still quite young. The inexplicable collapse of Ricky Rubio’s AST numbers hurts Fob Stars though, and it looks like this middling team will continue to rebuild and tread water. Toilet Bowl anyone?

IL Conceived (4-10-1)
It’s already been quite a year for our rookie owner, Frank. It took only one month to match former Jedi Knight’s record of one-win (in two previous seasons, Jedi went 1-36-1 overall), and IL Conceived actually hit 0.500 — including knocking off Sour Snails in WK6 — and looked poised to grab a post-season berth. Then the injuries hit, Aaron Gordon cooled off from supernova status, and IL Conceived pivoted back to a youth focused future.

A mid-season trade of Jrue Holiday and Jeff Teague for Harrison Barnes and Jaylen Brown is a long term strategy, and with a 0-5-1 record recently, Frank’s team is headed straight for the Toilet Bowl. Oh, but this team is highlight friendly! Rookie point guards Dennis Smith Jr. and Donovan Mitchell are high fliers, Gordon and Brown are both rim rockers, and then there’s fellow rookie Jordan Bell, who also dunks like a maniac. Many owners are regretting not nabbing Mitchell in RD1, letting him slip to RD2, and now he’s headed toward a ROY fight with Ben Simmons.

With five of the six dispersal draft picks looking good — sorry Justise Winslow — the foundation has been set for IL Conceived to compete quickly, and with an astonishingly exciting backcourt to boot!

Mid-Season 2018: Voltron

It’s the same old same old for Voltron division this year, with the exact #1-4 from last season intact. [Pre-season 2018]

Red Dagger (8-3-1)
It’s no surprise to see Thien atop the the standings here, as Red Dagger is once again a leading contender for a Russell Conference title. Having gone all-in before the season with the trade for Carmelo Anthony, this year is ring-or-bust for Thien. Unfortunately, OKC Melo hasn’t been quite as advertised, even though he’s still putting up pretty (inefficient) good numbers. The backslide story continues with John Wall, who has been both injured and lessened somewhat. No matter because Gary Harris has delivered in spades so far this season with 16.7 PTS, 2.2 3PT, 1.9 STL, on 49.0 FG%. He’s picked up the slack for Melo and Wall, and let’s not forget this team still features DeMarcus Cousins and Damian Lillard.

It’s unfortunate Patrick Beverly got hurt though, as he was having a find season as well. But hey, when you’re good, you're good, as Thien added rookie sharpshooter Lauri Markkanen, nice backups in Justin Holiday and Jeremy Lamb, and continues to build depth through constant digging on the free agent wire. This Dagger is headed straight for another playoffs!

So Buckets (7-4-1)
With seven wins already, Josh’s team is likely headed to a playoff spot too, even if digging into their record reveals a team that’s been mostly beating up on the weaker teams. Still, this is a squad ranked second in PTS, which is impressive isn’t it? There’s four prime time scorers on this team: DeMar DeRozan, Kyrie Irving, Joel Embiid, and CJ McCollum. All four are fantasy studs, and now DeRozan has added a three point shot too. Add in sophomore Dario Saric being able to carve out a role in Philly still — 17.6 PTS, 7.3 REB, 3.7 AST, 2.4 3PT, 1.1 STL — and it’s been kind of okay that Rudy Gobert has only suited up for half the available games. With such a strong core — don’t forget Jabari Parker waiting on IR — So Buckets could be poised to take on the big boys in the second half of the season. Remember, this was the team that upset Russell juggernaut Chunky Monkeys in RD1 of the playoffs last year!

Team Cameltoe (3-9)
We’re not sure what happened here. We thought Cameltoe was headed toward major success after a fantastic dispersal draft that gave rookie owner Felipe a competitive roster from the start. Instead, a late season slide last year has more or less continued this season as they are currently on a six game losing streak. How does a team with Anthony Davis and Hassan Whiteside rank last in REB?! (This team also ranked last in REB, AST, moves, and second-to-last in STL.) Sure, both injury prone big men have missed some games but that’s part of their charm.

Buddy Hield has been okay as a deep threat, Elfrid Payton still does his Rondo-lite impression, and Darren Collison still has a starting job, so things shouldn’t be this bad. JJ Redick has been excellent in Philadelphia too. Of course, maybe this is part of Felipe’s plan, as he waits on rookies Josh Jackson, Malik Monk, and IR stashed Harry Giles to grow up? Still, a stellar 2017-18 NBA rookie class and Cameltoe hasn’t had any of his three hit yet... Patience, patience!

Snack Bears (2-10)
Speaking of rookies that haven’t quite popped, De’Aaron Fox, drafted fourth this past year in SlamNation, has been outplayed by quite a few rookies already. It was expected that Fox may not shoot well from the get-go, but his Super Saiyan speed and copious amounts of available playing time in Sacramento was supposed to give him more than 10.1 PTS and 4.0 AST per game right? Same thing with rookie Jonathan Isaac, who was pitched as a versatile swingman, but hasn’t flashed much of anything. So yeah, Snack Bears is headed to another Toilet Bowl, and possibly the worst record in the league.

The thing is, we like this team! Kristaps Porzingis has evolved another level, Andre Drummond can hit free throws now (a clear trade win for Snack post-mega deal), Dwight Howard is averaging a shocking 15.7 PTS, 12.1 REB, 1.2 BLK on 53.5 FG%, Marcus Smart and Rajon Rondo fit this "no PTS by design" team, and Will Barton has been very useful alongside Evan Fournier. Go up and down this roster and it should all spell out more than two wins. We haven’t even mentioned Spencer Dinwiddie, who has been on a tear in Brooklyn recently. We know this is a weird team, set to tank certain categories, but it would seem like there’s enough talent here to gather up for a proper Toilet Bowl run. Let’s hope Brandon can get it together and earn a top pick in next year’s draft!

Mid-Season 2018: Transformers

A division that gave us no winning teams last year is back on the rise! [Pre-season 2018]

Another Bad Creation (9-3)
After falling into a division title despite a losing record, ABC is here to prove that last year was no fluke. Jostling for a three-peat division title, Oliver’s team is positioned as the best team in Chamberlain Conference so far, which is quite an accomplishment. A full year of Russell Westbrook has helped the team, as well as the re-emergence of LaMarcus Aldridge. But the one key factor that can’t be overlooked is the incredible play of Tyreke Evans, who has been averaging 19.7 PTS, 5.1 REB, 4.7 AST, 2.2 3PT, and 1.1 STL per game, with good percentages too. That’s some superstar level production at a cheap price from the draft. Add in the PTS/REB from Enes Kanter, TJ Warren’s scoring prolificacy, and this team isn’t all that worried about Dirk Nowitzki and Dwayne Wade fading out. Currently on an eight game winning streak, Another Bad Creation looks to be headed for another (hopefully deep) playoff run!

Sager’s Suits and Ties (8-4)
What a surprise! Coming off a rookie year in which Matt only won four games, we assumed 2018 would be a rebuilding year. How wrong we were! SST came to play this season and despite injuries to preseason starting point guard Jeremy Lin, they’ve compiled a stellar record — with all four losses coming 4-5 also — and are for their first division title. What’s going on exactly? One word: Oladipo! Victor Oladipo was the fourth pick in 2017's dispersal draft but he’s elevated himself to (fantasy) superstar levels with 24.5 PTS, 5.2 REB, 4.1 AST, 2.7 3PT, 1.9 STL, 1.0 BLK, and 49.2 FG%. I had to write that all out because how many shooting guards have such incredible numbers? Alongside that, Lou Williams is contributing his usual points and threes, plus the continued good health of Bradley Beal has given SST a killer shooting guard lineup. Sure, Blake Griffin has been dinged up and Draymond Green has taken a dip with his scoring (again), but with so much firepower from the guards, Matt is headed toward a dramatic turnaround.

Squirtle Squad (6-6)
A 4-1 start had us thinking Squirtles was going to ride Giannis Antetokounmpo back to respectability after an eight-win season last year but like the real life Bucks, The Greek Freak may be lacking in some teammate help. It’s been three straight losses for Brian’s squad, albeit against top competition, and it’ll be a battle to get into the playoffs. The recent injury to Nikola Vucevic — who added a lovely 1.4 3PT this season — isn’t going to help. In addition, sophomore keepers Marquese Chriss and Thon Maker have both taken steps back and any promise they showed might be gone soon. The great news is that this year’s prize rookie, Lonzo Ball, the return on making the Toilet Bowl finals, has been much better the last month, averaging 13.9 PTS, 7.7 REB, 7.2 REB, 2.8 3PT, 1.8 STL, and 0.9 BLK, albeit still on horrific shooting. With Ball getting better, Giannis being Giannis, and the soon to be returned Zach LaVine, Squirtles will settle in for a wild card battle for the playoffs, or maybe they’ll sink back into the Toilet Bowl and try to get another high pick?

LA Buffy (2-9-1)
After three seasons of dipping in and around 0.500, the wheels have fallen off the Buffy wagon after starting off 1-6. We knew it would be a rough ride with Isaiah Thomas out, but Danilo Gallinari, George Hill, and Austin Rivers have all missed time too. At least Khris Middleton has been healthy and doing fantastic with a well-balanced and robust stat line as a sneaky great swingman! And Domantas Sabonis has surprised after being freed from OKC, dumping in nice rebounds, points, and field goal percentage.Plus, sophomore Brandon Ingram is looking very solid with 16.1 PTS, 5.4 REB, 3.3 REB, and 0.8 STL/BLK a game. There’s a decent mix of young and old here but health is the major factor. If IT4 has a big second half, and this team gets a bit more healthy, Buffy will have a puncher’s chance in the Toilet Bowl, which would be his fifth straight appearance…