Deadline Bombshells

With minutes to spare -- and a bit of overage -- two huge deals went down right at the deadline after a flurry of desperate communications league wide. The first one could have championship implications as the #1 seed in Russell Conference, NJ All-Stars, flipped future assets for a win now mentality that could put them in the driver’s seat for a championship. Oh wait, there's still Sour Snails over in Chamberlain Conference, the betting man's favorite.

As we’ll show in tomorrow's article, NJ All-Stars is a big threat and also a championship caliber team. Powered by LeBron James and Paul George, they play an intriguing small ball style that features plenty of outside shooting. What management felt they needed to put them over the top was someone capable of heavy REB, nice BLK, and a good FG%. With intriguing assets sitting on his injury report, Ryan Anderson and rookie Nerlens Noel, GM Eddie was looking to deal. NJ All-Stars had been pounding the wires trying to get a big man for his team but no takers bit. It looked like he would have to head into the playoffs with J.J. Hickson and Kris Humprhies as big men fill-ins.

• ID#43: NJ All-Stars trade Ryan Andersen, Nerlens Noel, and 2015 RD2 to Fob Stars for Joakim Noah.

As the clock ticked down however, Fob Stars emerged from his Los Angeles hole to move his present for the future. Joakim Noah, acquired in a 2011 draft day trade, had been fully healthy for all of 2014 and was throwing down 12.4 PTS, 11.3 REB, 1.5 BLK, 1.1 STL, on 48.8 FG%. For Jimmy, parting with his team's heart and soul will be tough but there’s no doubt Noah deserved to play for a contender. The son of Yannick fits perfectly into NJ All-Star’s roster, even giving them an extra boost with his unexpected 5.0 AST from the center position.

In return, Fob Stars receive the prototypical stretch power forward for his third-to-last ranked 3PT team. While Anderson had an injury plagued lost season this year, he did average 19.8 PTS, 6.5 REB, with 3.0 3PT during his 22 appearances. He’ll boost Jimmy’s PTS and 3PT while not losing too much in REB, which Fob Stars already excels in and this move is a fine example of quite a few ideas from "Trade Machine." And finally, the mysterious Nerlens Noel, who is intriguing due to his wide range of NBA comps. Is he Tyrus Thomas? Is he Andre Drummond? Is he Will Smith? Is he Anthony Davis-lite? Heck, is he Joakim Noah redux? Noel doesn't yet have much of an offensive game but his actual rookie year next season should yield REB/BLK/STL galore for a Fob Stars team that could use an uptick in both.

Overall, this looks like a perfect deal for both sides as NJ All-Stars get the extra sauce they need for a title run and Fob Stars trades his 29 year old vet for a 25 and 19 year old who are bouncing back from injuries. The extra RD2 Fob picked up from All-Stars was just grease to make the deal go. Well done all!

Another trade slipped in maybe a little post-deadline, one that dramatically alters the shape of the Toilet Bowl field. Inept Henchmen and Funk Coalition just made a move a few days ago, the immortal Kevin Garnett for Tony Wroten exchange. That turned out to be the appetizer for this main meal.

• ID#44: Inept Henchmen trade Derrick Rose, Eric Gordon, and 2015 RD1 to Funk Coalition for Dwight Howard, Tony Parker, Avery Bradley, Kirk Hinrich, and 2015 RD2

After multiple failed talks trying to flip a premier center for a premier point guard, GM Jon finally decided he had to roll the dice on former NBA MVP Derrick Rose. It’s not worth going over Rose’s numbers pre-injury because it’s been so long since he’s played for real. Rose's upside is obvious, but his career could also go the way of Penny Hardaway and Brandon Roy. (If I knew how to play craps I would make a craps analogy right now. Double twelves?)

For Inept Henchmen, last week’s uplifting win versus MoRRie’s Pogiboys -- resulting in a higher seed -- made them take note when an instant rematch was scheduled for round one of the Toilet Bowl. GM Trevor set out to find an extra piece to take him over the top in REB, the category that he won by a mere +7 in WK19. Well, adding Dwight Howard and his 12.4 REB should do. Howard will be slotted in alongside Derrick Favors, Kenneth Faried, and Andrew Bogut to do battle with Anthony Davis, Roy Hibbert, Miles Plumlee, and John Henson. It should be quite the matchup!

The twist is that Inept Henchmen’s upcoming 2015 RD1 is now Funk Coalition’s. Inept will receive Funk’s 2015 RD2, likely to be one of the first selections of the round, in exchange for his pick. This gives Funk two first rounders -- at worst a top five and a top seven selection -- in a loaded draft. That’ll match the number of picks Chunky Monkeys have this year, which is an intriguing turn for their round one Toilet Bowl matchup. Basically, Monkeys and Funk both have another team working toward their potential high draft choices. Note: Andre Drummond could be out for the week though, and it’ll be quite the battle for Funk on the boards without both Dwight and Drummy Bear.

Also included in the deal was Tony Parker, Funk Coalition’s last remaining original keeper. Although Parker had served his team well, Funk decided to go in a different direction and opted for more of an outside touch. Parker is averaging 17.5 PTS, 6.2 AST, 50.2 FG% but doesn’t provide any three pointers. Eric Gordon solves that problem with his 1.6 3PT, while adding 15.7 PTS and 1.2 STL. Funk also threw in a still recovering Avery Bradley and recent free agent addition Kirk Hinrich to bolster Inept Henchmen’s current state of affairs. The two guards are expected to take Harrison Barnes and Derrick Williams roster spots, as well as pushing out Tony Wroten. Yes, that Tony Wroten...

Overall, an interesting deal on both sides as Funk Coalition pivots away from his huge lineup to add two injury risk guards while Inept Henchmen builds on his already strong frontline for a play at ultimate big ball, and with a point guard ready to the floor immediately. An unexpected rebuild for two bottom dwellers, we love it!